rate_review Reviews

you realy shoud contune this story it's very good trust me:)

that was a great stoy you shoud coune it :)

Thanks for the reviews guys. I lost my password to this username so I am thinking about creating another story called Wutai Girl 2 which will continue this story. My new name will be Sapphire Weapon.

..Well this is not the way i act but.

Nice story awsome!!!!!!!
never give up Writting Lemons

..Well thats over with..as you can see there not many Cloud/Yuffie Lemons out there
Thats is your mission if you accept

I don't like the format of characters talking through script, but I guess as you're new, that's easily overlooked for now. Not bad, there are a few things that I'd change, but all in all it wasn't too bad. The only thing though is I stopped taking this seriously during the first chapter when Yuffie is going swimming. As soon as she starts to unclothe, she immediately goes into giving out how good she looks naked. It could of been a little more 'poetic' in describing her body. Also, what is it with girls and shaving their pubic hair? I just don't understand why a maturing teenager would want to look exactly how she did when she was 10. But, that's not really anything to do with your story, she can look however you think she looks naked. If you read this reviewanytanything, just think of it as crunstructive criticism and don't take offense if you disagree with how I feel. Might commcommend a Beta Reader. They help in locating errors that you or the spell checker are unable to locate and give insight on how the story made them feel. I'd be happy to assist. Anyways, good story.

Quotation marks are your friends. Garbled speech with hardly any indication of who is saying what is your enemy. Also, you say Yuffie is now magically in love with Cloud after one night together - I think not. This whole thing appears to be a PWP that's trying to pretend it DOES have a plot, and it just isn't working. Sorry and all... :/

You said review right..well here I am...I want to see more chapters...this story is not stupid..I rather enjoy it a lot. Keep it up...the great adventures of Yuffie...*giggelz* Maybe eventually she will reach up to Sephy...*gigglez*

-saya

please make more chapters