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January 9, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Wha?? There's more to come right?? GAWH .. need to read & find out more :)
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October 19, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Awsome.
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September 17, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Beautiful, absolutely beautiful.
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September 16, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Woohooo! Great story so far, I love it so keep it up!!! Great plot and wonderful description of the mako poisoning, take your time writing, I know the rest to come will be just as splendid if not better ^_~ I have faith in your writing skills!!!
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September 11, 2006 at 12:00 AM
You somehow confused some things...
Kadaj ist the youngest one, yazoo is the middle brother and loz is the oldest.
Kadaj ist the youngest one, yazoo is the middle brother and loz is the oldest.
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September 11, 2006 at 12:00 AM
*continuation of the first rev*
at least they are in the original story and people can get really confused if you write about kadaj being the eldest (at least it read like he was) when they still have the thoughts in their minds that kadaj is the youngest of them.
at least they are in the original story and people can get really confused if you write about kadaj being the eldest (at least it read like he was) when they still have the thoughts in their minds that kadaj is the youngest of them.
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September 11, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Besides: Your OC is a hyper-mega-uber-extrem Mary Sue.
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September 9, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Wow, I love what you've done with the three silver haired boys and the girl just makes it better, kudos to you!!! I love the emotion that you put into your writing, and the way you make them seem so real is phenominal. I understand that it's hard to get people to read your work when you write an alternate universe fic, trust me, I have a few, but I really would like to see more of this story, it's well written and very entriguing. Keep it up, I look forward to the next chapters!