rate_review Reviews

I have love your story from the beginning. I have no clue why you dislike chapter eleven. I think it was very well written and sweet too. I like the fact that we now know the direction, the relationship may take with the star characters.

YAY a review at last
Excellent chapter.
I loved how Seifer is starting to take more and more interest in oir Kitten.

Hope to read you soon.

It was an interesting chapter, and the length was good. Smut or no smut, though I think that's really your strong point in all this, any story that’s attempting plot is not going to have much of anything worth telling if every chapter is centered on a lemon.

I’m nitpicking because that’s what I do, but only for authors I feel deserve it. I feel you’re doing a good job and have a lot of potential to improve, hence my continued reading of this story.

I know you do not have a beta, which explains all the awkward sentences and the errors here and there. I’ll mention a couple things that stood out. 1) Someone cannot speak ‘silently’ unless they’re speaking inside their head. I assume this is perhaps a small misunderstanding with your English. It is paradoxical to have someone say something aloud and describe their voice level as ‘silent’. ‘Silent’ has no real interpretive uses and is not synonymous with ‘quiet’. I think what you were going for was ‘quietly’. 2) I'm slightly thrown by Squall's lack of education, not even finishing elementary school. I know you made mention of it in the beginning, but it seems rather pointless and only demeaning to his character. At least make him a high school drop out, anything less doesn’t incite pity for the poor and prideful hero, but rather it diminishes respect held for him. 3) I haven’t read other responses to this story, but your author’s notes seemed to be trying to downplay some negative reaction to Seifer’s feigned rape. Extreme or not, that’s how you went with it as an author, so never mind what others think or let it influence too much. And also, given the piece you wrote that started all this… that stunt Seifer pulled is nothing. So I have to wonder who would complain about it after reading the prequel consisting of a gangbang.

Okay, too long, but I didn’t review every chapter, so consider it compensation. Keep on writing and practicing, you’ve got a talent for lemons and potential for everything else. I assumed a lot in this review, so please don’t take my overbearing critique the

Loved this chapter! I really like the cameo Quistis made. And Seifer finally turning over a new leaf, I guess you could say. It was very nie to see them actually.. get along for once. I guess I can forgive the lack of smut... this time. ;D Hah, just kidding. Great job, as usual. Looking forward to your next update?

Awww. Seif's such a sweetheart!!! In his own way... xP Cute chapter - I can see why Squall was mad...He's like a private guy and Seifer can be overbearing. I'm amazed at how fast you get these chapters out - then again, they're so addicting, I think I'd sob my eyes out if I had to wait months between chapters. :) Wonderful job!

Seifer is so messed up. Will he ever understand that physical pleasure does not equal consent and lack of psychological damage? Squall's too good at hiding and being proud . . . otherwise, he'd probably have broken down and bawled by now. (Not that I think Squall should cry! That'd be sickeningly OOC.) So, how has Squall been avoiding Seifer? I hope Seifer is frustrated even more in the next chapter. It's time he got a little torture for everything he's put Squall through.

Loved it. Great chapter, and well needed after the last. It's good to see that while Seifer doesn't exactly regret his moves, he at least knows he went too far. And I'd love to see Irvine play a larger part. I could almost see Squall getting a little attached to him and Seifer getting all jealous. Good job and keep it up!

I loved this chapter~! It's starting to form a nice plot. :3 I love how Seifer's getting all affected by this, I wonder how Squall feels though? :D I hope you update soon! Keep this story up, it's so good.

Such a MINOR thing.
-dies laughing- xDD
I'm working on the chapters. Sorry it's taking so long. =x

LOL!! Will Seifer finally apologize or force his way(as always)? If he can find Squall, of course...
/Seifer/Fuck off...
Go use your fist, blue balls!^^
Good continuation!^^