All of Us Monsters
folder
Final Fantasy VII › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
12
Views:
1,054
Reviews:
20
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Final Fantasy VII › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
12
Views:
1,054
Reviews:
20
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Final Fantasy VII, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter 12
Disclaimer: I don't own SquareEnix or any of their Squaresoft
characters. I don't own Advent Children, or else I would be rich. I
don't own Cloud, Fenrir (his bike), Vincent, or any of Cloud's many many many
swords. I do not intend to make money off this. I just like to
write.
have seen the movie, you might understand where this could be coming from,
although *now* i have taken great liberties with Vincent's character...
I've recieved lots of good words for this on the Livejournal Community acfiction. Still
no sex (yet). Trust me, it may get
better before you know it, loves.Chapter 12Cloud must have seen me only seconds before his mind could put two and two
together. But his heart knew. It had always known that, without him,
my own heart could not continue to beat by itself because I wouldn't let it,
couldn't stand to sleep alone at night with my own wretched body churning and
throbbing with life that was better spent in death. I was not greedy or selfish -
I was downright pathetic. But it was madness or Cloud, and I was slowly
falling into a pit of self-induced insanity for him. So when I pushed the muzzle under my chin, my need screamed out in silent
despair and I was ready to let go of it in the most final and irreversable away.
Unlike six months of repenting isolation, someone answered.My life did really flash before my eyes. I saw myself, young and free but too wise and too thoughtful. Alone, until I became a Turk,
and death was a dark pleasure in the monotonous rhythm of living from which I took
far too much pleasure, the only thing I ever - rarely -allowed myself to feel... I saw Lucrecia, her flashing smile, her dancing eyes, the love, the aching, damning
love as the devil in glasses and a white labcoat took her away and I did
nothing, nothing good enough at least, to stop him.I saw Cloud in the firelight, sitting with his eyes flashing blue and red
with the fire. I remembered the taste of his lips and the sound of his
voice when he spoke to me in the softest, most honest of whispers, betraying his
secrets and his need to me in the blind, faithful way that children did.
Only he wasn't a child, and he knew what he wanted, and it wasn't me, had never
been me. I had kept his bed warm while he was dying, and that was all.
Now he would find someone worthy, more alive than I could ever be. Someone
who could laugh more easily than I, who loved more easily, someone who asked no
questions and told no lies, even to themselves, about their relationships with
him.All our adventure, battles, torment, injury, heartbreak, revelation, and
triumphs piled up before my eyes in a mountain of self-discovery. Then I
took all of that in one moment, and threw it away from me, as far away as I
could make it, like throwing a box of memories from a window and watching it
fall open and each item spiral into black, besotted oblivion.All of that happened in a handful of seconds. I had taken three
breaths. I counted them when I closed my eyes and prepared for it, the
bullet, the tiny angel that would penetrate my brain and bring a darker sleep,
better than any I could have hoped for. Three... Two....But fate decreed that it was not to be. Not by a long shot, I am
fortunate to say.Intervention. I should have heard him. The signs hadn't mattered,
because I would have followed through no matter what I had seen. But I did
not expect the hard, warm pressure of someone grabbing my wrist and twisting it
so painfully that I dropped the gun onto the floor. There was a crack as
it discharged and a grunt of pain and I was no longer fully aware of who or
where I was at all, or who had been shot. But my attempt at death had been
cheated from me, and the next thing I felt was implacable rage."NO!"I fought the hands that held me. I struggled, writhing on the chair as
a sudden weight fell on my legs, and I was trapped. I snarled, striking
out, my bare hands reaching to crush hold of whomever had slighted my plan.
But instead I only found a muscular arm against my chest, pinning me back and
back until I almost had no breath."Do you want to die?" the intruder shouted. "Is that how it
is? You want to fucking die so bad you won't even look at me? Look
at me, Vincent!"I writhed again, frustration mounting... and then
it was gone. I was blessed with a good long look at my intruder, and the
blonde hair falling carelessly every which way in a neat array of disobedient
hair. The porcelaine angelic quality of his face which, in any other
light, I realized would be a healthy glow attained by days laying in the sun.Cloud had me trapped, utterly and completely. I was crushed and
thoroughly helpless against the cushions of the chair. I had no more strength to push him away then I had
voice to shout. I leaned my head back slowly, swallowed hard, and
came back to myself. I gathered up my memories, who I was, and put them in
the corner to observe and recollect later because right now, I was rigid with
self-loathing and shock.I had been one breath away from killing myself, and Cloud Strife had stopped me.It occured to me that Cloud was panting. The scent of trees and
gasoline collided with my senses; suddenly I was weeping. I twisted my
face away and moaned. The nature of Cloud's embrace immediately changed, and
instead of pinning me roughly to the chair, he guided me like a gentle wind into
the circle of his arms. He stood up and brought me along, weak and
wretched, my heartless sounds of undoubtably the largest bout of despair I had
ever felt. To my own ears, I sounded broken and hollow, as if I had been
crying like that for weeks... and perhaps I had and didn't remember.Enough of that.Cloud was soothing me. I had never imagined him to be capable of it,
but he was soothing me as though I were a child, which perhaps made more sense
now that I think about it. He held me close in his arms, the warmth of his
heat welcome. I only wept harder before the landslide of despair began to
trickle away. His kindness tore me up and then swept me together, all in
one, harsh movement... but gradually my strength was building back again.
He crooned and murmured against my ear, a promise, a favor (love?), and his
friendship. I brought my hands to his chest and pulled on his crinkling
winter jacket."You alright now?"I opened my eyes slowly. Had I been falling asleep on my feet?Slowly, tiredly, I nodded. Cloud, regardless of anything I might have
wanted, nodded stiffly and took me into his arms again, shivering violently for
a second. "God, Vincent, what the hell was going through your mind?""...I don't know.""Let's get you upstairs. And then maybe with a little rest you can tell
me what's going on..."In a few minutes, I was stripped out of my work clothes and resting
quite comfortably in my own warm, beautiful bed (for which I had been craving
all day - my body was aching for reasons I could not understand) and Cloud was wrapping up his arm. I
blinked, a cold chill seeping into my veins."Cloud, the Geostigma--" My lips formed the words; my
mind hadn't caught up with the present, still tangled in webs of memory.
Half-panicking, I sat up.Cloud pushed me back with his free hand. "No, no. It's not Geostigma. The gun went off and I got the ricochet, that's all. I'm
alright. See?" He showed me the bandage. It was a small affair, barely worth looking
at, but it was not wrapped around his entire arm. I relaxed slowly,
trembling imperceptibly. My mind was in a jumble. But he was here.
Cloud was here, and I'd have been a fool not to be thankful.The warrior took my hand, leaning close. I didn't understand how he got
here or how he even found me. But it was an unimportant fact. I just
wanted him to be close; I felt the tears again and their threat to
overcome me. He slid onto the bed, his long, muscular limbs finding
a secure place to rest around my body."Am I dreaming?" I said softly. I could not wake up to another
disappointment. Not again. I was so afraid of it that I didn't want
to close my eyes.His words came with warm breath that fanned against my neck. "No, Vin.
No, this isn't a dream. I'm right here, and I'm taking care of you..."He closed his eyes. I listened to him breathing for a long time.
I was not even remotely embarassed but rather intrigued at the twist my destiny
had taken. In my defiance, I had wanted nothing more of life if I could
not have it with Cloud. And yet there he was in my living room,
nonchalantly waiting for me that same day. I felt my lips curl upward slowly. It was too much. I laughed
humorlessly.Cloud squeezed me gently. "Vincent?""I went crazy," I stated, "because I was convinced,
absolutely certain, that you would no longer care to have me.""Why were you laughing?" His voice was close, near my ear, and it made
me shudder hard. His supple, strong arms were ruthlessly snug and if I had
wanted to escape, I doubted he would have let me easily. I didn't move."Because, don't you see how ironic it all is? I don't understand why
you're here. Am I mistaken to assume that you're here out of love?" Eyes shut, I pressed my lips together and stole a shaking breath. I was
trying to imagine myself, some minutes earlier, if Cloud hadn't saved me from
myself. Would I have been laying on the floor in a pool of blood, coat
crumpled like blackened, broken wings underneath my still and lifeless body?
Cloud... oh, what would he have done?Cloud smiled. I could feel his lips against my cheek as he kissed it.
It was a shy, nervous thing, but it was *something*, and I had to be grateful
for that. But I did not expect the flood of relief and sadness and joy
that rocked my mind. I was dizzy for a second while he spoke to me."It was hard enough tracking you down... I spent one month looking through
every town and village I could. I don't know how many times I've said 'man
with red eyes and black hair'... but I never gave up. I even..." He
paused hesitantly. "What?""...checked the basement of the Shinra Mansion. You weren't in there.
You weren't even in the library or in any of the other rooms, either. I went
crazy trying to find you. And then I heard a rumor that you moved out of
your old shop to find business up North. I took an airship to Bone
Village, then a bus to Icicle Inn, and.... here you were. I asked around;
I rented a snowmobile and got to your house... and just in time."By the time he was finished, I had schooled my nerves into becoming calm
again. His voice put me at ease. I had lived six months in this
house with nothing to listen to but the telvision, radio, my own mental
reiterations, and the hum of the refridgerator. The flowing, light timbre
of his voice, which belied the strong, cold exterior of his being, washed over
me like a cool forest stream.The warrior leaned upon his elbow. He touched my shoulder, his head
tilted to one side. "...Vincent, you were really going to kill yourself.
I don't know how that can be funny to you, but it isn't to me!""I'm sorry...""Sorry? That isn't good enough! I... I thought I was going to...
to--""But I'm not dead. I'm fine." I turned over to face him,
and I took his face gently in my hands and kissed him, long and hard, and he
melted against me. We breathed each other's air for a few moments. I
thought with a sense of deja vu what a generous, loving kiss he had, and how
good he was to me, as his hands pulled at my blankets and he slid underneath
them to rest along the length of my body, which by all rights shouldn't have
been growing as warm as it did. He returned the kiss harder, delicately
soothing me with his hands when I began to try and pull away. And things
were clear and bright again, as though Cloud had come into my life and turned on
the light, abolishing the darkness I had lived in for so long.