Ceaseless Oblivion

I own nothing. As always. However, in my head, I own a Laundromat and Cloud and Sephiroth do my laundry…and each other in the closet. *laughs as both men get it on* One last thing! I made Cloud 25 and Sephiroth 34 because one year has passed since Dirge of Cerebus and Advent Children. That is all, enjoy!

Rated M for a vivid memory, and immense blood and gore. You have been forewarned!


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What can we take on trust
in this uncertain life? Happiness, greatness,
pride - nothing is secure, nothing keeps.
~Euripides, Hecuba

Never in Cloud's life had he experienced something like this. He had never remembered a time in his past life, in his teenage years or adulthood when he felt this enraptured with anything, much less a specific someone. Sure, he had loved training and getting better, pushing his body to the limit. That was for his wish though, to join SOLDIER and to live his dream.

However, never had he been so beguiled with a certain someone. That someone was the man who was trailing behind him, walking as his companion, and now, friend. If only Sephiroth knew that a friend was the last thing his body wanted.

Since he had considered the thought of him being "that way," as in, being into men, Cloud had thought about the pro's and con's, though all that led for was a headache and frustration. If he was into men, it would explain why he was never interested in Aeris in or Tifa for that matter. Yes, they were beautiful women, Tifa with her hourglass figure and Aeris with her petite waist and dainty hands. But none of them stirred his blood, ever. He just wished for them to be friends, and nothing more. Since Aeris was in the Promised Land and Tifa with Reno on Gaia, learning to cope with his death, there was no point in not accepting that he was not into them.

Then there was the matter of thinking if he had been that way his whole life. Cloud knew that this simply did not happen, this realization, this way of thinking. Meaning, he had to be into men his whole life. He looked at it from a psychological manner: since he could not remember his father and had always strived to find a father figure, he figured that this derived from his longing for male attention. However, that person who he had wanted, that idol he had was following him now, and was the man who had caused him so much turmoil. Sephiroth was the reason behind so much of his own grief, identity crisis, and friendship loss that he didn't know what to think.

That brought up other issues as well. Since Sephiroth was the man that he had looked to when he was younger, wishing he could be just like him, he thought it to be nothing but resurrected hero worship. The man wanted change, and it was evident that it was working. There was no more sardonic laughter, no more dark musings from said man. Instead, he was a calm being, one who observed, theorized, and calculated, both in silence and in outward shows. He was someone saner, someone nearly sound in body and mind. It impressed Cloud, but he still could not ignore the past. What happened had happened, and if he was not so stubborn, he might be able to look past it entirely. Cloud was a lot of things, but he was never one who could do that lightly.

That is what made this entire situation so frustrating. For, if he was into men and was now bewitched by Sephiroth, the man who had given him misery to his core, then he was going to have to do some serious rethinking. Or, deny with every fiber of his being. Which was what he was doing currently.

Cloud remembered the way Sephiroth had looked when he stripped in front of him. He had to look quickly away and dig at the earth, feeling heat pour from every pigment of his skin. Every cell in his body screamed at him, wailing to go over there and have his way with the man, just to get some release from him. This made him dig at the ground faster, dirt staining his fingernails as he threw the ground every which way. It was far better to be humiliated by this display than to be embarrassed by what he might have done.

His tongue danced in his mouth, and he pressed it to his teeth, trying not to imagine how good it would feel to capture Sephiroth's lips in his own. This made a flush light his skin, and he felt like scolding himself for being nothing better than some wanton girl with a crush on an older man. For in theory, Sephiroth was a good nine years older than him, someone who he should not even be allowed to think of in such a manner. Besides, how could a younger man such as himself even conceive the thought of anything aside from hero worship? It was unnatural, this lust, this like, this…whatever it was.

Therefore, he would forget it ever happened. Which was far easier said than done.

In the process of a week since the fateful time when Sephiroth stripped in front of him, Cloud battled this attraction since the moment he woke up to the time he closed his eyes it seemed. Tifa always said he had the ability to cherish everything, every emotion and every single person in his life. He had no idea how true those words would be.

So, in denying himself, he knew what he had to do. He had it down to a science, the art of denial itself. All he had to do was not look at Sephiroth directly, rather at the space behind him, the ground, or something else. Yes, this would definitely be a set back in their friendship that he claimed they had, but it was far better than getting flushed and hard while looking at the man. To his shame, that happened at least once a day. Never mind if they happened to touch, for that was when Cloud felt his skin blaze, as if some match were held beneath his skeleton, setting his soul aflame.

But, all he had to do was not look at the man. At least, so he thought. Sephiroth's voice was always loud and booming, commanding and filled with strength, a voice that could lead whole nations. Hell, it had led to the victory in the Wutai war. But it was also one of the most beautiful things Cloud had ever heard.

How had he not noticed how handsome it was before? It was deep, rich, what lullabies and orchestras were made of. It was the bass and the lighter instruments combining in the man's vocal cords, creating a symphony of noise, one that was pleasant to the ear. And to other places as well. No matter what words came from his mouth, Cloud felt a small shudder ripple up and down his spine. It made him feel weak, and so foolish for succumbing to it. He felt like an ingredient used in witchcraft, one that was used for a higher cause, a deceived little pawn towards some ultimate trickery.

To make matters even worse, he found that every night without fail, his mind would stray towards a certain memory in his youth, one that was better off forgotten. It was something he had thought of once or twice here before, but not every single day like it was now.

Sighing, Cloud relived the memory once more, as his companion and friend slept, unaware of his dirty thoughts he had in his youth towards him, almost ten years ago.

It was a few days before SOLDIER was due to appear in Nibeheim, and Cloud had just turned fourteen years old. With all of his training beforehand, he was a rather built young man, one who was determined to be a hero like Zack Fair and Sephiroth, more Sephiroth than Zack however.

Sephiroth's poster hung on his wall, on the right side of his room where his bed lay. His room was spotless, and his mother had gotten to praising him from being so neat constantly, saying that Sephiroth should have been his idol earlier on in his life. This made Cloud flush, for he enjoyed thinking of the man a little too much lately.

Like that night. He lay awake, and knowing that his mother was fast asleep in the other room, did not hesitate to do something healthy, something that every young boy should have done. Cloud sat up with his back to his bed posts, took a small intake of breath, and took off his sleeping pants and briefs. Sometimes when he was too excited to sleep, a slight bit of masturbation helped release his pent up energy and anxiety. Though, those were hardly his thoughts as he did the act.

Cloud gripped his throbbing erection and began stroking the head of it, working it counter clockwise, and then clockwise. Foreplay was always best he knew. Unbeknownst to his mother, Cloud had some lube in his sock drawer, something that he had kept hidden from her for many years. Ever the secretive one.

The youth reached into the drawer and retrieved the bottle, and poured a small amount of it into his hand. It smelled sweet, almost like berries. He resisted the urge to lick it, and instead pictured a girl in front of him, a shy and timid girl. She looked a little like Tifa, his neighbor who had asked him that if she ever got into trouble, that he save her with his SOLDIER skills. He was only happy to comply. He was too weak to save her on , thus he would do everything in his power for her.

The specter smiled to him, and she stood up in a red satin bra and underwear, accentuating her breasts and backside. Cloud began stroking himself almost furiously, picturing the girl taking a hold of his cock and placing it in her mouth. He let a small gasp escape his mouth, and then began breathing deeply, trying not to shout. He had once come so loud, he was not surprised he didn't wake up the entire neighborhood. But he had long since learned not to shout so loud.

Vividly, Cloud saw the girl smile and suck on him. That was not going to happen he knew, but he heard that in SOLDIER, many women were more than willing to give a warrior a good time. He might lose his virginity before his next birthday. The thought made him stroke himself harder, and he felt heat pour down his loins, his inner thighs lighting up with internal heat. This was so satisfying, he could not imagine what it would be like with a partner.

Cloud felt his eyes rest instead of on the made up girl on his bed to his right wall, the image of Sephiroth looming over him, his own personal god. He knew that Sephiroth had to do this as well, for every male and female had a right to self satisfaction. This was not wrong. His heart beat faster when he looked to the framed poster, one that posed Sephiroth with his masamune blade in his left hand. He looked directly at the camera man, as if it were appalling to look at something other than the man's eyes. Sephiroth's oculars were of a man used to self confidence, a man who was used to getting his way. This man was his everything, and meeting him someday would be a dream come true.

Out of nowhere, Cloud felt his breath hitch in his throat. Pre cum poured out of his member, and Cloud started, wondering what had inspired it. It was not the made up girl he was thinking of, but rather Sephiroth. Sephiroth. The name sent a delicious tingle to race up and down his spine, and without thinking, Cloud began saying the name aloud.

"Sephiroth." His cock twitched in anticipation, and Cloud entered himself, placing not one, but two fingers into his shaft. He groaned with the pleasure of feeling himself, and Sephiroth's name slipped out not once or twice, but five times. He didn't know what he was thinking, but it was causing him to have the biggest hard on of his life. It felt right somehow, feeling this elated. This was the type of euphoria men searched their whole lives for, and all they had to do to achieve it was to touch themselves.

".Roth." He said the man's name in three to four word syllables, and it became the sexiest thing he could think of. Without thinking, or without thinking of reason at all, he saw Sephiroth before him. The man's exotic eyes twinkled in the moonlight, and his hair glimmered like quicksilver in the room. Cloud gasped aloud and felt that he was near his own climax. He pumped his hand harder and faster into himself, and began saying things he normally would have said to a girl of his own makings. But they were meant for Sephiroth.

"Yes…uh…right there…" Barely, at the recesses of his consciousness, Cloud wondered if this was an okay thing to do. Teenage boys did crazy things when their hormones were raging he knew, but this was…abnormal to say the least. Teenage girls certainly could have pictured Sephiroth in all of his glory before them, but teenage boys who were straight should do no such thing. However, in the heat of the moment, Cloud saw nothing wrong with a little imagination. It was what made a person unique after all, special. And if he wanted to impress the man, then he was going to have to be greater than himself.

With a loud gasp, Cloud came. Stars danced behind his eyes, and he felt white hot heat course down his legs, semen pouring up and around his thighs. He rolled off the bed, knowing before hand that it would stain his sheets lest he lay there. It dripped down his thighs, and in Cloud's mind, he saw Sephiroth before him, spreading his legs and lapping at the white stuff while on his carpet. Cloud moaned and rolled to his right, looking up at his master, idol, and god himself in the framed poster.

That would never be he knew. Besides, that was ridiculous to think. Sephiroth was a good nine years his senior, and such a thing would be considered rape if that could have ever occurred. Cloud nodded, but had never felt so released. Orgasm did wonders for a male, despite how they got there.

To this, Cloud felt a sigh escape his lips. How could he have been so foolish? Only a young boy who was into men would jerk off to the image of a handsome male. Though, he had been a child then, no more than an infant. And he had been given a gun and told to defend ShinRa, training with the rest of them. So much had happened to him in his time on Gaia that at times, Cloud felt weary from fatigue, from memory. If anything, he had lived many lifetimes before this one.

Cloud's eyes strayed to the man who was dozing at the fire, the man who had once been his master, idol and god itself. His back was turned to him, and in the orange light from the fire, the blaze cast shadows up and around him. Cloud saw many shades dance on the man's back, as if the darkness itself meant to give him wings. That's right. He had been the fore bringer of death, the avenging angel who had used fire, destruction and the might of his hand to bring to ruin the village he was raised in. How anyone could be so cruel was beyond Cloud's understanding.

Still, he understood more than he ever did about the man. He knew that he had given Sephiroth death three times, once by mako, second by his swords, and third by the Buster. And in return, Sephiroth had nearly killed him countless times. He had toyed with his psyche, and hurt his soul too many times to count. If anything, Sephiroth had betrayed the image that he had made him up to be. That image fell to his feet in charred remains, ash scattering to oblivion. However, there was a reason he was here with this man. It was to put all of that affliction that they both had shared, and all of their past grievances aside, laying it all to eternal rest.

But the funny thing about laying something to rest, was that sometimes, the phantoms lingered.

Cloud pinched the bridge of his nose and lowered his face to the ground, feeling the hopelessness of the situation. Here he was, with glowing skin, wings, and a man who had used to be his sworn and bitter enemy, expected to escape oblivion. Right. Who could do that?

Out of nowhere, a ferocious roar startled Cloud out of his thoughts. He scrambled to his feet and looked around, fists raised. He looked into the darkness around him and had never felt so small in all of his life. An unnatural swell of fear coursed through his being, one that he had not felt since he heard that Sephiroth was alive for the third time. This was something else entirely.

Speaking of Sephiroth, he had to wake the man up. Who knew what they had to face?

Cloud cleared his throat a few times, and was able to speak after two tries. "Sephiroth. Wake up!" There was no change in the man's seeming catatonic state. Cloud glanced warily around and fell to his knees, crawling to the sleeping man. He gripped his shoulder and shook it roughly, trying to wake Sephiroth up.

"Wake the Hell up! We're being attacked!" To this, Sephiroth's eyelids fluttered open. He looked to Cloud and in a moment of insanity, Cloud lost himself in their jade depths, forgetting the immense danger both of them were in. Sephiroth nodded and jumped to his feet, and Cloud did the same, scolding himself for once again, breaking his own rules. This was no time for that! Actually, there was no time for it period.

"What happened?" Cloud looked around in the darkness that surrounded them, and felt that for the moment, they were both trapped in the heart of some demon, one who's soul was as black as the ungodly midnight hour. The star both men had seen now seemed very far away. Abyss did that to you.

"I heard a roar…I think we're surrounded by something." Sephiroth nodded and scanned his eyes through the darkness.

"Cloud, place your back against mine." Cloud felt repulsed by the idea, not because he still hated the man, but because he knew that if he touched him, placed his back to his and felt it's warmth that he would succumb once again to the man. He didn't want that.

Instantly, Cloud's shoulders were seized by Sephiroth's, and he felt as if the man had a grip of iron. Sephiroth shook him roughly twice, hard enough for his teeth to clatter against each other. Cloud shook his head and was met with frantic, yet determined mako oculars.

"Cloud! Snap out of it! I don't care about what we once were to the other…just place your back to mine! That way, we'll make it out alive together." Cloud felt himself nearly choke on his own saliva. Sephiroth's eyes were wide, and they looked like the image of a man who was frightened, scared out of his right mind. He had never seen such a look come across the past General. Cloud's eyes opened wide with shock, for he knew then that Sephiroth was scared. These were the beasts they would have to face, what all of that working out and sparring had been for. Fighting whatever came their way in this bleak, desolate land.

Cloud nodded and placed his back against Sephiroth's. "Together." A thought seized him as he fell in his battle position. "Our weapons…are supposed to return." Sephiroth made a sound low in his throat that said he didn't believe him.

"Really? I doubt Minerva would grant me such a favor." As if to spite Sephiroth's words, a ripple of silver lined the air, and Cloud saw two objects become tangible through the light. It was unreal, yet it was happening before his eyes.

Cloud reached forward and gripped the handle of his Buster sword, hardly believing it was there. Yet, it was real to the touch, and he had nothing other than his senses to rely on. Shuddering, he released his wings from his back and felt his eyes close in slight ecstasy. He felt whole somehow, complete, as if having a weapon made him coalesce, coming together suddenly. He opened his eyes and saw Sephiroth look at him, and Cloud saw envy in his eyes, as if he wished he could experience the same thing as well. Who knew? Maybe soon, he would.

Sephiroth looked away from him and to the masamune in his hand. He gripped it first in his left, then his right, almost as if he could not believe that he had it again. He looked around the world then, and Cloud saw the image of a determined man, one who wished to eliminate the threat that plagued him, that wished to cause him harm. Self preservation, or the want to be good? Cloud had no idea.

They stood back to back, and together, they were a sight to behold. Cloud, his skin alight and glowing a light sapphire, his wings large and immense, a crystal hue to the feathers. His Buster was in his hand, and he looked like a warrior god meaning to avenge his people, his cerulean eyes blazing with might. Sephiroth appeared as if he were a deposed prince, one who wished to gain his title and favor back by his masamune blade. Mako eyes flared to life, as if battle were the one thing that could make him whole, make him sound and escape the sin of envy, of the man that was to his back. Silver hair streamed all around him, and it fluttered in a slight breeze, one that was not known for this world to have. This breeze was unnatural, a haunting sound.

The roar resounded again and Cloud gripped his Buster, looking around at what might have been surrounding them. There was nothing…and then he saw them.

There were not one, but twelve hideous creatures. They looked like a mix between a lion and a large reptile, spines coating their very skin, porcupine like. Twisted fangs dripped poison from their mouths, and in a very sophisticated and logical approach, the beasts circled both men, meaning to come at them at all angles. Their eyes blazed light silver, as did their skin, the unnatural white of bleached bone.

Cloud heard Sephiroth's deep breathing, and he wondered if he would be making it out alive. He had handled way worse than these creatures, Behemoths and Bahamut's alike…but still. This was oblivion, and nothing was guaranteed here.

The creatures pawed at the ground, talons raking the earth the way they desired to tear both men limb from limb. Cloud felt like retching, for everywhere the monsters stepped, they melted the earth with poison that came from their claws. This Cloud noted, for he knew that it would be fatal if those claws raked across his skin, or face.

"You take half, and I will do the same. Be mindful of their claws and spines." Cloud nodded to Sephiroth, and wondered if the sound he heard in his ears was a howling breeze, or the sound of hellfire freezing over, since two once enemies now fought together in battle. Cloud wondered if it was both. "Don't wait. Go now!"

Cloud nodded and charged to his left, blade swinging over his head, as if it had not been a few months that he used the weapon, but a few hours. Everything could be remembered it seemed. The blonde haired male swung at the snarling beasts, and avoided snapping jaws and swiping claws. He cut off many limbs and impaled two of the abominations in a few minutes, and he felt adrenaline charge through his veins, many bolts of electricity coursing through his entire body. He was destined to be a warrior it seemed.

The bodies were reduced to ash and blew away on the wind that screamed all around them, as if it were the mother of said creatures, wanting to do harm to the men that dared harm her children. Cloud ignored it, and instead focused his attention on the task at hand: killing that which meant him damage.

Two down, four to go. Cloud chanced a glance at Sephiroth, and he was not surprised when he had already killed four. There was no trace of bloodlust in his eyes, none of the usual mania that came when he held his own blade. No. There was only the resolve one had when they were extremely focused, seeing nothing else but that which was in front of them. Cloud nodded to his comrade and sliced one of the monster's heads open, spilling brains and blood all along the ground. The creature yelped and still tried with half of it's face open to try and kill Cloud, it's jaws snapping, meaning him harm. Cloud simply batted it away, and launched in the air, diving down and decapitating that one and the twin that came for him.

Two to go now. Cloud looked around and wondered where the others had gone to. Sephiroth was fighting the monsters he had made his own, and was doing a damn good job of it. Limbs were everywhere, and yet his eyes still held sanity. Even when a huge spurt of blood hit the left side of his face, he was still preserved, all emotions held within him. Battle made every man wear a mask.

Sephiroth looked up at him when he was done with his own monsters, and nodded to Cloud. Cloud found himself in rapture with the man, for he emanated strength and courage, a valor that he had wanted to possess his entire life. But in this moment, he could be his equal. They were friends, and none of his nonsensical fancies would hit light, no matter what he preferred in a partner. Yes, that was his volition as of now.

Cloud flapped his wings and rose to the skies, looking around at where the last two monsters were. Where had they run off to? Back to abyss, to nurse their wounds? Or was this all a part of their plan?

The man whirled around when he felt breath on his neck and barely dodged one of the monsters who were now airborne. He gave a cry and bashed it's head in with his blade, and he saw that the spines that lined the creatures flesh had enabled it flight somehow…though that made no sense whatsoever. Who had heard of a monster that could fly by spines? Nevertheless, it was so.

The creature slashed at him with his paws and Cloud sliced off part of the monster's arm, igniting a furious howl from a twisted mouth. With a grunt, Cloud killed it with a few thrusts of his blade, and ash scattered to the ground, like a mockery of white snow. Now the other….

Sephiroth was currently doing battle with that one, and after a matter of twenty seconds it seemed, Sephiroth had sliced off every single limb of the monster, and had managed to ram masamune down the things throat. It gurgled up crimson spume, but it didn't faze the silver haired warrior. Cloud landed just as Sephiroth was finishing up the killing, and once the body was reduced to ash, he let out a shaky breath.

Cloud looked around, and saw that everything was quiet again, peaceful. He knew it was too soon to celebrate, but this was a small victory. Often, those were the best. Sephiroth rose up from his crouched position on the earth and Cloud saw him grip something in his hand. It was a severed claw from one of the abomination's that did not turn to dust. He placed it in his pocket, and Cloud figured it was a souvenir of sorts, displaying that he had won a battle. That was formidable.

The blonde haired man turned around and surveyed the direction they had been traveling from. All seemed fine…

"Strife!" Cloud whirled around and found himself face to face with one of the same monsters, but this one was a little bit bigger. Its eyes were narrowed into slits, and a wicked grin split its face into two parts. Shit…this thing had two heads? No, just two mouths. Mouths that were headed right towards him. Cloud cried out and tried to pick up his blade in time to save himself. But he was a few moments two late.

'Goodbye…' Yes, this was the end of him. Would this mean that he was doomed to wander limbo forever? Or did it simply mean he would have to earn his ticket to the afterlife in another way?

He still lifted his blade, but found it would do no good. So, he simply closed his eyes, knowing that this went against every fiber in his being. He was Cloud, the one who could do anything, right? Wrong. Atlas had finally fallen.

Cloud waited for pain, waited to hear the snapping of jaws on his head. That was how he would go he supposed, digested into this vile things stomach. What a terrible way to die. Nevertheless, it was inevitable. Death was something that could never be avoided, no matter how much one tried. But there was no pain, no anything….

The blonde haired man opened his eyes when he heard two cries, both of pain. His jaw practically dropped to the floor when he saw what had just transpired.

Sephiroth had launched himself in an attack against the monster, not aiming for its back, but instead for the things face. In doing so, the monster lashed out with his front claws, and with the force of the monster, it impaled Sephiroth clean through his chest, on his left side. Cloud gasped aloud and charged into the melee, bloodlust on the mind. How dare something harm Sephiroth? He dared not think about how weak he had been, or how severe Sephiroth's condition was.

Cloud severed the limb from Sephiroth's chest, and once he did, Sephiroth hacked up scarlet spittle, spitting and cussing. Cloud's eyes opened wide, and he suddenly had a flash of memory, one that let him recall when Zack had died right in front of him. His face had looked serene, yet etched in a pain that was otherworldly. The man panted and Cloud saw a gruesome sight: that the creature had impaled him through and through, his claw writhing and twitching out of Sephiroth's back. This was gore, this was insanity. But this was battle, and it was abyss.

"Shit…Strife, kill that thing." Cloud snapped out of it, and made the motion to help Sephiroth. He batted his hand away and swayed on his feet, falling to the ground in a heap of blood and torn tissue. "Worry about me later. Deal with the threat first." Cloud could not believe what Sephiroth was saying! He was asking him to forget about him while he fought on! Though…that was war. Sometimes comrades got knocked down, and for the moment, they had to be forsaken for a higher cause.

Cloud nodded his head, and gripped Sephiroth's shoulder. "I'll be back. Don't you dare die on me." Sephiroth laughed and swooned, looking down at the mess of his chest.

"You're concern is touching. Now get your ass out there." Cloud nodded and swung the Buster above his head, his mind whirring with what had just occurred. Sephiroth…had saved his life.

In a battle roar fit for a mighty army, Cloud charged. He swung the Buster above his head and flapped his wings. He tore at the creatures eyes and blinded it in both eyes. The thing snapped at him with its jaws and Cloud bashed its teeth in and then swiped half of it's face clean off. It hit the ground with a thud, and then it turned to dust, to ash.

Then he began stabbing it on vital points on its body, and in his rage, he tore spines off and severed bones and skin from the thing, as if he meant to shred it to death. This was his way of dealing with his past weakness. Sephiroth had gotten hurt because of his damn inability to act, hence he had to prove himself yet again. Also, he felt the bud of attraction rear its ugly head, for it was a fantasy of his as a child to be saved by Sephiroth, saved from all that had occurred on a battlefield, or from himself.

The creature raised its claws and raked them down Cloud's right side, all down his exposed arm. Cloud yelped in agony and severed the arm, and he wondered if he would die from the poison. Still, there was no giving up. The monster howled in pain and Cloud brought Buster down in a mighty heave. He punctured its heart and it exploded to dust in moments. Cloud blinked away ash and flew to the ground, coasting the still winds. Everything was calm now, but for how long?

He saw Sephiroth keeled over, panting heavily. Cloud stirred a few dust clouds on the ground as he ran to Sephiroth, and he wasted no time in kneeling by the man to see how he fared. Cloud saw pain etched on the man's face, raw and intense, something that Cloud could not even comprehend feeling. He dropped his Buster sword and barely gave it a passing glance as it disappeared. That danger was over at least.

Sephiroth reached behind his back and tried to grip the claw and pull it from his back himself, but Cloud didn't let him.

"Stop. I'll do that for you." Cloud began shredding the man's shirt with his hands, for there was no sense for letting fabric get in the way. He didn't give himself enough time to think about what he was doing, but before he knew it, he saw Sephiroth's bare chest. But this was hardly the time to gawk at the man's skin. Sephiroth gave a weak chuckle and Cloud saw that he was clenching his fists at his side to keep from showing pain.

"How does it look?" Cloud gulped, and saw the extent of the damage. The monster had run him clean through on his left side, punching a hole in his lower left abdomen, and it ran through his body until the claws jutted out of his back. If he took that out…Sephiroth might die. Cloud panicked then, and felt the days stretch out before him, long endless days in abyss, days in ceaseless oblivion. He didn't want to be stuck here alone! But, a deeper voice told him, he didn't want to be stuck in this world without Sephiroth there, for despite what had occurred in their pasts, he had grown to care for the man.

"Bad. Sephiroth…you might die." Mako eyes met his, and Cloud saw in their glazed depths the want for release, and the want to end pain. Cloud saw that he would welcome death with his arms outstretched if it meant that he would not have to feel that torment. Never had he seen a face that had longed for death that badly.

"So be it then. But get this…" he pointed to his back "…the Hell out of me." Cloud nodded and gently took a hold of one of the claws. He wanted to be gentle, for if he was quick, he might risk causing permanent damage to Sephiroth's organs. Hell, he was probably dying from internal bleeding already, all because he had thought he was doomed, and chose not to try. How foolish he had been!

"Alright. Brace yourself." Sephiroth closed his eyes and bent over on his forearms, and Cloud could not help but picture him as a forlorn fallen angel, one who was getting his wings torn off, bloody feathers scattered everywhere by a divine hand. But…shouldn't this selfless act restore him?

Cloud took a deep breath, and began pulling with his left hand, for his right arm was injured and dripping blood everywhere. His pain was not the focus right now though; saving Sephiroth was. Mentally, he felt as if he should be reeling away from his thoughts, for there was a time when he had sneered at the thought of being this man's anything, much less saving him. But those days were gone.

He pulled gently, and he heard Sephiroth cry out once, and then stop. Cloud knew the man was biting his lips, trying his hardest not to show pain outwardly. If there was one thing he knew, it was that it was always best to show certain emotions. And if screaming his lungs raw meant that he would feel better, then he should by all means do it. Besides, he was the one who had a three foot arm lodged in his stomach. That deserved some sort of award, the reward being the ability to scream.

Cloud stopped and bent down to where he could see Sephiroth's face. Sephiroth blinked his eyes open and turned to look at him, upside down. Even his upside down his eyes mesmerized him.

"Sephiroth…fuck it. Scream. You deserve to feel." Sephiroth looked to him and Cloud saw a tear leak from his right eye. "And I was told that no one should ever be ashamed to show their tears. Cry if you want." Sephiroth looked to him with a glance that said that if he was anyone else, he would have disobeyed him. But since he was himself, he would do just that. Cloud nodded and placed his right hand, the injured one, on Sephiroth's back, meaning to comfort him. "I wont judge you."

Then he began pulling again, and he heard faint whimpers escape Sephiroth's lips, as if he had no idea how to scream, no idea how to show pain. That was tragedy as well. Cloud managed a few inches and saw that in a few moments, Sephiroth would be free.

"Just pull it out!" Cloud did just that, and Sephiroth let out a shriek that bounced around the land, one that sounded like the cries of the damned, the cries of those doomed to eternal damnation. Cloud shuddered and tossed the limb aside, not even thinking about why the limb did not turn to ash inside of Sephiroth. That was not important. What was important was the gaping hole that had been made of his chest and back.

Sephiroth sat up slowly, and Cloud steadied the man, holding him up with his own body strength. It was the least he could do. Sephiroth looked to Cloud's right arm, and grimaced.

"You're hurt as well." Cloud shrugged and looked around, feeling as if he was in a nation filled with unfamiliar people, and he was drowning in the blurs of faces. It was the feeling of one who didn't know what to do, where to go, or how to act. What was he to do now? There was no shelter as far as he knew, and they had zero means of bandages or anything. What were they to do?

"I don't care. I just…don't know." He felt as if he had been forsaken, betrayed to the highest caliber of his being. Shouldn't he have gotten a warning from Zack, from Aeris, from…someone? Shouldn't someone have told him that they were about to be attacked? That was the thing about life here: no one told you what was going to happen. That was the thing about life in general: it tended to be unfair, and plunge people in unrelenting situations.

Sephiroth swooned and Cloud saw his head roll forwards and then back, the result of blood-loss. Cloud looked around frantically, not knowing what to do. Then, suddenly, he knew.

Quickly, he allowed his wings to emerge and in a very hasty move, he picked up Sephiroth and launched him in the stream. Water splashed everywhere, and he lay the injured man down in it, for he knew that since it cleansed them of their daily filth, blood should be no different. It was only a theory, but there was nothing else that Cloud had to go on. Nothing at all. Hence, he had nothing to lose, aside from Sephiroth.

He remembered the poison that the creature's claws and fangs were filled with, and he wondered if the water would cure Sephiroth of that. Cloud looked down at the man and saw that his face was in a passive state, and it appeared as if he liked the water. His eyes were slipping closed, and in a panic, Cloud shook his shoulder gently.

He said two words. "Don't die." Sephiroth's eyelids fluttered open, and a small chuckle was heard from his lips.

"Don't you…know by now, Strife?" He smiled a small smile, one that made Cloud's heart escalate, even in these grave circumstances. "I have a hard time dying." Cloud managed a faint laugh and he looked to Sephiroth's wound, seeing that the water was churning against it, as if it were the antibodies in his own body that meant to cure him of infection. Was it working?

"This feels nice." Sephiroth looked up to Cloud with eyes glazed over with fever, and with drowsiness. "Join me." Cloud felt the man grip his arm and lower him to the water, meaning to let him feel the water with him. Cloud gasped when he slipped into it, falling to Sephiroth's left, his injured arm hitting the healing liquid. It felt so nice, as if it meant to cleanse away all of his impurities and leave him a changed and sound man.

Cloud relaxed and let the water soothe his skin, and he knew that for the moment, he was not forsaken. There was a reason Zack had not alerted him he knew, and he might not ever know the reason. But for the moment, in this painful yet elated state, he was alright. Frantically, he wondered if this was the inevitable calm before death, the tranquility one has before they slip into the hereafter forever. If that was the case…then it was a worthy death.

"You saved my life. Why?" Sephiroth chuckled softly, and Cloud heard the sound of a man who was extremely tired and in pain, but was willing to answer anyways. Cloud felt his eyes flutter closed, and the oblivion behind his eyes welcomed him into its embrace.

"I already told you, Strife. I want to be good. You were going to die. I couldn't let that happen." Cloud felt a faint pulse line his body, almost as if he was held in the womb of someone, and he could feel their heart beat against his own weak body. Was this what it felt like to die? He felt himself falling into unconsciousness, and he imagined his soul leaving his body, leaving it to become a part of something else entirely.

Cloud answered Sephiroth then. "Whatever the reason…thank you. I'm in your debt." Sephiroth managed a sardonic laugh.

"Don't even Strife. You avenged me, and you are hurt as well. I say, with all of the shit I have done to you, we're even." Sephiroth sighed aloud, and the sound was soothing to Cloud's ears.

Cloud felt like he should say one more thing before he fell asleep, or died. Whichever it was. How strange that this water made him so tired. "Whatever…just don't die." Sephiroth chuckled and Cloud imagined him nodding his head.

"I could say the same to you." Cloud felt himself lose consciousness then, but he felt something strange happen with his right hand, with his fingers. It felt like…no, it couldn't be. It felt like Sephiroth had intertwined his own fingers into his, as if he were afraid of facing abyss, of sleep, of…whatever it was they would experience alone. No. The man was not alone…if he had him.

No matter the cause, the situation was grave, and extremely serious. It was the painful severity of coming close to death, of saving your once enemy and falling head over feet into unadulterated infatuation.


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