Eternal Fall

"General Sephiroth, sir."

"Yes?"

"I'm from headquarters. You will have a new mission coming up shortly. Here is the briefing."

"Thank you."

"You are to assist in putting down any resistance to the ShinRa. Furthermore, someone with your status needs to perform maintenance one of ShinRa's most important mako reactors. There has been word of the reactor causing mutations in the monsters around Nibelheim."

"I understand."


Eternal Fall: part XVIII: Adventure


"Zack, are you going to sign up for anything?" asked one of the other first class members. "You've been done with your instructing job for months now!"

"Huh? What do you mean?" Zack asked, shoveling food into his mouth.

"You don't know?! They're setting up missions all over the place to put down ShinRa resistance and to go on some monster hunts! You can get out of here for a while and do some serious work!"

Zack's eyes widened and he jumped out of his chair, causing the people around him to turn away from their meals. "What?!" he yelled. "Where?!"

"You're so dense!" one of the other members laughed. "Just sign up on your computer panel or something."

It only took Zack about a minute to finish the rest of his food before running out the door with a grin, making his fellow first class members laugh out loud. He quickly made his way to the new barracks where his room was located. He had finished his position instructing recruits, and now he could do more exciting things. He didn't have to live in the dorm anymore. Instead he stayed with other first class members. Sephiroth also gave up his room in the dorm and stayed either in his home on the edge of the base, or in the unknown location he would disappear to every now and then.

"Alright! I can actually sign up the network for this!" he exclaimed to himself as he put in his requests. "I need a break from this place! But damn, these missions are about a month away. I want to go now!"

Someone knocked a couple times before entering, and Zack turned to see Sephiroth.

"Good afternoon," Sephiroth said.

"I COULD JUST HUMP YOUR LEG RIGHT NOW!" Zack exclaimed.

"I wouldn't advise that," Sephiroth smiled. "Did you hear about the missions? All of the other members are excited."

"Of course I heard! It's about time! I'll go on a rampage if I can't go anywhere."

"As long as you apply, I'm sure they'll fit you in somewhere," Sephiroth said, sitting on Zack's bed.

Suddenly Zack's computer beeped. Zack turned around and checked his messages.

"I got one already! Automatic approval! I guess no one else wanted to go, but shit! I don't care where it is!" He turned to Sephiroth with an evil glint in his eye. "I need to relieve my excitement! Bend over!"

Sephiroth chuckled and threw a pillow at him. "Did anyone ever tell you you're a very perverted individual?"

Zack caught the pillow and grinned. "Guess who my superior officer is for this mission. He walked over and sat on Sephiroth's lap. Take good care of me in Nibelheim!"

Sephiroth shook his head and smiled fondly. "Just be good."

"Nothing could happen in that little town," Zack grinned, standing up. "But at least I'll get a break away from Midgar. Sometimes I think I'd be happy if I never saw this place again!"

~~~~~~~~~~

The young soldier stood in the middle of the running track that afternoon, looking up at the sky. He thought he saw a bird fly by, but he knew that couldn't be so with all of the pollution and the industrial horizon of Midgar. He sighed and straightened his hat. He heard someone approaching, but made no move to turn around. He just wanted to be left alone with this sad, hopeless, trapped feeling.

"I'm surprised you aren't running around," came the youthful, deep voice. "I never see you anymore. I feared you'd left. But now I know you're just overworking yourself, as usual."

Cloud continued to stare towards the sky, but he wasn't really looking at anything. "I won't run away."

Sephiroth nodded. "You're strong, Cloud. You don't need to be in SOLDIER to know that."

"It doesn't matter anymore. I have nothing to look forward to in my life. I work hard because it's something to keep me going."

Sephiroth looked at Cloud sadly. "You sound like I did... at your age. You sound like I did for most of my life."

"That's where the similarities end, because I'll never be anything like you."

Soldiers started to file onto the field, and Sephiroth thought it best for both of them not to be seen alone together.

"Cloud, come see me tonight," he said gently. "I want to make sure the similarities really do end there, because no one should have to be anything like me."

"Yes, sir," Cloud said without emotion before walking over to join his group.



Sephiroth didn't know why he was so bothered by Cloud's words. He walked to his home on the edge of the base to think. Throughout his path he ran into soldier after soldier. He noticed the way they looked at him, as though he were some mysterious being. Many of them were afraid. This only bothered him more.

When he got to his home he immediately took off his uniform and gear and took a warm shower. He let the water wrap his body in warmth and flow through his hair. Why was he so bothered? What was it that was shaking him up right now?

Cloud wanted to be like him. Why? No one should have to be! No one should have to fear failing at every second. He didn't have the option to fail, because to fail would mean death. He was nothing without his job with the ShinRa. He would never be anything without them. And to be as skilled as he was, it would mean a life of never-ending torture, the loss of a childhood, killing people you felt no anger towards, and no one to give a damn about you. And yet Cloud, and so many others in this world, wanted to be like him?! It was the most naive thing he'd ever heard. He didn't want anyone to be like him. HE didn't want to be like him.

And standing there, talking to Cloud, he realized that nothing was going to change. Nothing had changed at all. He was still only validated through his job. There was nothing else for him. He could never be whole. Zack and Cloud wouldn't always be there. And if he ever wanted to move on, he couldn't. The ShinRa wouldn't let him go. And he would stay anyway just to make sure others didn't get killed for letting him go. He didn't want people suffering needlessly. Much of the reason he was there was to protect others, not see them suffer. And even if he could leave, what would he do? He didn't know how to live outside of this stagnant place.

He was making himself... upset. Was that what it was? Or was angry the word? What emotion was he feeling? He didn't even know. They were all beaten out of him. Whatever it was, he didn't like it. He finished his shower and put on some comfortable clothes.

Sephiroth thought back to the times when he would meditate with his summon materia to calm himself. But not long after the war had ended years ago, he released his materia to different parts of the world, letting the summons feel what it meant to be with the earth once more. Kjata was the happiest, floating freely and mysteriously in a deep forest that only Sephiroth dared to enter.

He didn't want to see Zack. He didn't know if he wanted to feel better, and Zack would do anything to see his friends happy. He almost felt pleasure in feeling an emotion so deeply. Now he had the control to feel without the demonic woman taking over. He fought her for so long, and now he was too strong for her. He could feel so deeply now, and it helped him to understand life a little more. Things made sense. He slowly started to drift into his own thoughts with this feeling of balance, even if his emotions hurt.



"Are you taking a nap?" Clouds voice awoke him.

Sephiroth slowly opened his eyes. "I suppose I am." He sat up, almost amazed that he fell asleep. But what little light from the sun that actually reached Midgar came in through his windows. He sat up and tchetched.

"You wanted to talk?"

"Yes, I did," Sephiroth said, still feeling some of the pain from earlier. But now that Cloud was here, he had no idea what to say to him.

"Is something wrong?"

"No. Cloud... you can't go through life like this. You're just going through the motions, as Zack would put it. There must be something you look forward to. You have to find a purpose."

"Why should I?"

"Because I don't want you to end up like me!"

ud wud was surprised that Sephiroth rose his voice at him when they weren't even in training, but he didn't say so. He only sat down next to the young general.

"Cloud, you have the freedom that I'll never have. Use it. You were denied admission to SOLDIER last year, yet you stay and make yourself suffer."

"It isn't that easy. I can't make myself like or love something. It just happens. And now, I have no passions or aspirations. Those are gone!"

"There is so much you can do once you leave this place," Sephiroth said, softening.

"There is nothing I want. I'm getting stronger here, hoping that something catches me."

Sadly, Sephiroth knew there was nothing he could say. He felt just as worthless so many times in his life. Nothing anyone said to him reached him then. It was Zack's actions more than his words that got him to open up to even having a friend.

His green eyes shifted to the young blonde sitting next to him. Cloud was suffering as he had suffered. But there was one difference. Cloud had him and Zack to watch over him, while no one had watched over Sephiroth. But these past few months probably left Cloud questioning whether or not they were there for him. Sephiroth denied him the affection he wanted, because it wasn't the type of affection Sephiroth was capable of giving. And Zack wasn't around as much anymore after the dorm broke apart.

"I have to go..." Cloud said, standing slowly. "I'll think about what you said. I know you're right, but it's hard."

Sephiroth caught Cloud's wrist and held it. "If anything happens to you... I'll be..." he paused and looked up at Cloud, his jade eyes holding something buried inside. "It will... hurt. I'll be hurt."

Cloud looked down at his wrist as Sephiroth slowly released it. "You'd be sad if anything happened to me?"

"Yes."

d knd knew the weight of those words coming from this ever-tranquil young general. His expression didn't change, but his words were never a lie. "Trust me," Cloud said gently.

Sephiroth nodded slightly, and he stood to walk Cloud out.

"I feel the need to thank you, Cloud. Talking to you today helped me to evaluate some things in my life. They are not resolved, but they are being evaluated."

Cloud stopped and looked up at the silver-haired young man. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm not sure what I'm feeling. But I will be alright."

Cloud didn't move or open the door. He continued to look into Sephiroth's slightly troubled eyes. He then slowly pulled of his gloves and placed a gentle hand on Sephiroth's cheek.

"There is another reason I'm still here," Cloud said softly.

"What reason is that?"

"You, of course," Cloud said, his blue eyes holding their deep gaze.

"I don't understand."

"You know how I feel," Cloud said, sliding his hand away and turning towards the door. "I guess my situation isn't as complicated as I make it sound."

Soon Cloud was gone, and Sephiroth stood their silently. His confusion grew. His feelings grew. He couldn't understand it. There was something bothering him now, more than before, but he couldn't place what it was.

He turned to see that Cloud's hat was sitting on his couch. He slowly walked over and picked it up. He meant to run out to Cloud and give it to him, but something stopped him deep down. His fingertips trailed over the fabric gently, and he thought about how much Cloud reminded him of himself. And then, without reason, he slowly raised the hat to his face and inhaled. Cloud's scent was there, although faint. Sephiroth realized what he was doing and dropped the hat on the couch. He looked down at it with wide eyes and shook his head.

"What are you doing?" he asked himself softly. “You’re behaving like some sort of animal. And now you‘re talking to yourself…. Stop this nonsense.”

He grabbed the hat and made his way out to drop Cloud's hat off and to talk to Zack.

~~~~~~~~~~

"So you're feeling emotions, you say?" Zack asked with a grin.

"Yes, a lot of them," Sephiroth nodded.

"And you dwell on things a lot?"

"Yes."

"And you can't focus as well as you used to because of these emotions?"

"Yes, exactly."

"Welcome to the human world!" Zack laughed. "Seph, this is normal! You just don't know what it's like to let go!"

"Why now?" Sephiroth sighed.

"Maybe you're going through something like puberty," Zack blinked.

"I'm serious."

"So am I, Seph. I mean, you didn't really get to experience the things most people did when they were growing up. And now that the demon bitch is out of your life and the war is long gone, you've got the time to start thinking and feeling like a normal guy."

"I like being able to feel, but it's also becoming a burden."

"Yea, it must suck to only hit your shooting target ninety-nine out of a hundred times due to being distracted."

Sephiroth smirked at that.

"You just have to take it easy and examine each feeling. Examine why you feel the way you do. And if you can't figure it out, let it run it's course. Just don't tell yourself you aren't feeling something when you're really feeling it."

Sephiroth went to bed late that night, but it took him a long time to find peaceful rest. His dreams haunted him. He dreamt of his emotions getting out of control and he dreamt of the demonic woman taking over. He had a dream in which he couldn't stop tears from falling from his eyes, and then he had a dream of being a child. That dream was the worst. He remembered every beating he received for showing any type of emotion. His dream ended after he had a nightmare of falling from a great distance. No... he didn't fall. He was pushed.... Someone pushed him. Hojo's face flashed in his mind and he woke up with a start.

He couldn't understand how normal people could feel this much and still function. He sighed and tried to sleep again. He tried to think of something relaxing. Soon he felt himself sinking into a dream again. It started out very dark, but then everything was light. He could see his hand resting beside him, and he knew he was a child in this dream. What surprised him more was that he knew it was a dream. Fingertips slowly combed through his silver hair. His head was resting on someone's lap. Slowly, he turned to lie on his back and to look up at the person. He gasped at what he saw. Pitch black hair cascaded around the pale skin of the man's body. His sad red eyes looked down at Sephiroth.

Sephiroth felt an ache in his chest and he sat up to face the man from his past. "Tell me this is only a dream," he said in his child's voice. "Tell me you're alright! Tell me you aren't still in pain!"

The man with the red eyes only pulled him into a tight embrace. "Sleep, young one. Find peace tonight."

"No..." Sephiroth murmured as his eyes grew heavy. "Vincent...."

"...Sleep...."

Sephiroth awoke early in the morning, his body tense. And now, he had a new goal. He would find out what happened to Vincent as soon as his next mission was over. He could still feel Vincent's touch in his hair. Something horrible happened to him, and Sephiroth had to know what it was.

"You both should have been mine!!!! Vincent yelled to him so many years ago.

"Jenova..." Sephiroth said to himself, trying to recall the memory. "Hojo said that's who my mother was. Did she really leave me? Or... did something happen to her and Vincent?"

Images suddenly flashed in Sephiroth's mind. Things started to become more clear. Where was he when he was a child? Which place was that? Vincent wasn't simply in a jail.... It was more like... a cage. Or was that his imagination?

Sephiroth desperately tried to recall everything that happened to him before all of the damaging events of the military and the war. But then he realized that his very early childhood probably wasn't much better. He had an excellent memory, so he must have pushed that part of his life so far back into his mind that he could no longer reach it. Perhaps everything he had pushed back was starting to resurface? That would explain this new surge of emotional imbalance.

He walked out of his room and washed his face with cold water. He stared at his reflection for a moment before washing up and getting dressed. When he reached his living room his eye caught someone lying on the couch.

"Cloud?" Sephiroth asked, seeing the young blonde in his uniform, which was tattered and dirty. "Are you alright?" he asked, walking over and kneeling next to him.

"I got into a fight," Cloud said, opening his blue eyes. "They wanted hurt me because they thought I looked at them wrong. But I defended myself, and I ran. I ran away. I didn't just let them hurt me. I'm a little surprised that I cared enough to run."

"I'm glad you're alright, Cloud. Do you want me to take care of them?"

"No. It's okay," Cloud said, mindlessly fingering through his blonde hair. "I guess I thought about what you said to me...."

"I see," Sephiroth nodded.

Cloud was covered with scratches and bruises on his face and neck. The young genesighsighed softly at what had happened to him, even if he did run.

"Would you mind taking off your jacket?" Sephiroth asked. "It will be easier for me to cure you that way. I'm not exactly concentrating all that well lately."

Cloud nodded and sat up, sliding off his jacket. Sephiroth saw the bruises that covered his arms, and he started at Cloud's wrists, the bruises disappearing and the scratches healing as he moved his hands up Cloud's arms, barely touching. Cloud closed his eyes at the sheer relief. Sephiroth finally cleared his mind, and his power was able to sp thr throughout Cloud's body with ease. He gently pulled Cloud to lie down on the couch again before his hands sent a more gentle power through Cloud's neck, up to the more sensitive skin of his face. He carefully and slowly brushed a fingertip over Cloud's bruised eye, then moved down, sealing a cut in his lip by brushing his thumb over the soft skin there.

"Does that feel better?" Sephiroth asked softly. "Did I miss anything?"

"No, I feel great," Cloud smiled very softly.

Sephiroth was glad that Cloud came to him, and he was glad that he could make Cloud smile, even if it was a small one. And when Cloud opened his blue eyes, Sephiroth could see the trust that had opened up in them. Zack and Cloud offered him so many different emotions to experience. He was more open with Zack. Zack was his best friend and he could share anything with him... not that he liked talking about himself all that much. But he loved Zack lthe the brother he never had... if he knew what love was. And then there was Cloud. He didn't speak with Cloud as much, but he felt a connection with him. And he could understand much of what Cloud felt, because as much as he didn't want Cloud to face what he did, they were alike in so many ways. This connection was different from what he had with Zack.

"I didn't want to be a burden or anything," Cloud said. "I didn't know where else to go."

"You're no burden."

"I always feel like you and Zack have better things to worry about. And you guys never ask for anything in return. Not that I have anything to give, but if I could, I would."

"You think you don't offer anything? That's not true, Cloud."

"Whatever I offer, if anything, it isn't enough."

"It is enough," Sephiroth said, recalling the times when he had no one to speak with like this... before Cloud or Zack were there. "It is..." he trailed off.

Cloud heard him trail off, and he heard what sounded like buried pain in Sephiroth's voice. But he had no time to think about it. A curtain of silver hair lowered around his face, and his heart nearly leapt out of his chest as the young general kissed him very softly. Cloud froze, not knowing how to react. When Sephiroth pulled away, he seemed thoroughly confused himself.

"I'm sorry, Cloud," he blinked. "I didn't ask what you wanted. I don't know why I did that."

Cloud sat up on the couch and looked into the eyes of the young general kneeling before him. "It's only fair that you suffer con consequences, right? It's only fair."

Sephiroth didn't know what Cloud meant until the blonde leaned in and kissed him again. As if sharing the same thoughts, they pulled each other closer and deepened the kiss.

Suddenly a disturbing wave of some forgotten and painful emotion filled the young general. As though he could sense it, Cloud pulled away.

"I know," Cloud muttered. "You're worried about me again, right?"

Sephiroth shut his eyes, trying to determine where the intense feeling of dread and pain came from.

"It's painful having these urges, isn't it?"
That year... that time....
"Trust me, life would be more focused for you without them. We will help you get rid of them for good. Then you will be a more focused soldier."
It can't be erased. It's a scar that never fades.
"This is for your own good..."
No, it isn't....
"Your body will learn that sexuality is not needed in your life."
But passion is human....

Suddenly the sting of the whip hit him, and he jolted as if he were actually there in the lab as those people tortured him and stole part of what made him human.

"What is it?" Cloud asked, softening. "Is she back... that demon?"

"No..." Sephiroth said, shaking his head. "But I am being haunted by old demons...."

"Is it my fault?" the young blonde asked.

"No. Not at all."

"Why can't we act as though there are no consequences for just one night?" Cloud asked softly.

Sephiroth sat their silently, not looking up at Cloud for a long moment. Finally, he rose his head slowly and asked one simple question. "What do you want from me then?" he asked gently.

Cloud blinked, completely surprised. He sat there staring for a long while. "I... I want...." He didn't know what to say. He had no idea how to answer now. And suddenly he felt intimidated, and a small chill of fear crept through him. Sephiroth only sat there, his jade green eyes holding their piercing gaze. The young general's muscles were barely visible through his shirt, and his biceps looked like they wanted to rip the sleeves. Cloud averted his eyes, warmth rushing to his cheeks.

"Tell me, Cloud," Sephiroth said, tilting his head just slightly. "I really don't know."

Cloud exhaled. He thought about his millions of fantasies, the many things he wanted to do and have done to him. Every single detail flashed through his mind. But they could only be fantasies. Sephiroth had no idea about his own sexuality, and he certainly wouldn't try to take Cloud. And there was no way Cloud could take him in the way he wanted. Sephiroth was too powerful, too perfect, too immune to vulnerability. Cloud almost laughed at how impossible it seemed for anyone to be able to sink inside the young general and touch him so deeply.

"You're always so calm and peaceful," Cloud said. "Don't you ever get angry? Aren't you ever really happy? Don't you ever feel any emotion so passionately that you think it will take over?"

"My passion... was stolen, and I buried all that was left of it to keep me going," Sephiroth said.

Cloud looked at him in surprise. Sephiroth was actually talking about himself in a way that he probably only talked to Zack.

"You don't like to be touched, do you?" Cloud asked. "Is that why you usually cover yourself from head to toe?"

"I'm not used to physical contact. It makes me uneasy sometimes. Zack likes to touch people when he talks with them, and I'm just starting to get used to it from him. I wear what I do when on duty because when I was in the war, another soldier got infected with something from my blood and died a horrible death. I only expose the skin at my chest so my body doesn't suffocate."

Cloud realized that Sephiroth would answer any question he asked. The young general probably thought that this is what Cloud initially wanted. Information without consequences.

"Do I make you uncomfortable?" Cloud asked.

"No."

Cloud slid off of the couch and sat beside him on the floor. He brushed Sephiroth's silver hair from his face. "Are you sure I don't?"

"You don't."

Cloud hesitated to say anymore.

"Ask as you please. Do as you please," Sephiroth said. He found that he was curious about Cloud's wishes.

"Anything I please...?" Cloud asked, raising a brow.

"Anything."

~~~~~~~~~~

"I'm glad you're happy," Aeris giggled.

"Yea," Zack grinned at her image on his computer panel. "It's great. Everything is going perfectly. I'm getting stronger, and I'll be your knight in shining armor."

"I miss you, Zack. When will I see you again?"

"I'll beg Sephiroth to let me visit you right after our trip to Nibelheim. If not then, then hopefully sometime soon."

A knock sounded at the door, and Zack grinned and walked over to it. "Hold on, babe."

"Okay!" Aeris smiled.

Zack opened the door with a bright smile on his face. But that suddenly faded, and he found himself frozen in place. There was a note taped to his door, but no one was there. For some reason, the situation made him uncomfortable, but he couldn't place why. He took the note from the door and went back inside.

"Who was it?" Aeris asked.

"No one. Just a note. That's weird."

He opened it and read it. He winced slightly when he realized what the letter was written in. Aeris could just make out the color from her end of the connection.

"Is that..." she began.

"Yes, it's blood. Or it's meant to look like blood."

"What does it say?"

"It says, ‘I'll be there, watching. I'll be with you. I'll kill him. You'll be there to watch him fall.’"

"That's creepy!" Aeris frowned. "Go tell Sephiroth!"

"Hey! I can handle myself ya know!" Zack pretended to pout.

"I know!" Aeris giggled. "But I like knowing that you have someone to watch over you, and that you have someone to watch over."

"Yea... and I'll be watching. I'll be watching a lot of people, because this isn't a funny joke. When I find out who wrote this, it won't be pretty."

"Let's hope it's a joke," Aeris frowned again. "I hope you don't really have to witness someone being killed."

Zack knew that Aeris feared for him, especially since the war. It hurt Zack deeply when he saw his comrades dying. And now, he was going on missions, and some of them would be dangerous. Aeris had complete faith in , bu, but she feared what he would experience.

"Don't worry," Zack smiled warmly. "No one will die while I'll around to protect them."

~~~~~~~~~~

Cloud ran to his barrack and shut the door behind him. He grabbed his blonde hair and hung his head as he sank to his knees. He had Sephiroth there and willing to answer any question or perhaps even give him the chance to fulfill some small physical need. But Cloud, for some reason he couldn't comprehend, ran away.

"I'm sorry. I should go. Thank you for... caring." And then he left, and his pace quickened until he was running back to his room. Sephiroth only nodded as he left, his serene ways remaining.

Why did he run? What was wrong with him?! He'd never have that opportunity again. But he couldn't handle it. The most powerful man on the planet was right there in front of him, opening up to him, and he took off! Cloud hated it. But he just couldn't stay there. He knew that he couldn't make Sephiroth want him if he didn't really want him. And what frightened him even more was when he realized that he didn't just want to fulfill his urges. He wanted all of Sephiroth. He wanted his desires, his thoughts, his body's consent, and... his heart. Cloud ran, because when it all came down to it, he let himself care too much. He couldn't let that happen. He couldn't... because Sephiroth was right. How could they ever be together?!

People were beginning to enter the area, and he quickly composed himself. Or rather, he tried. But when he found that nothing could help him calm down, he ran outside and tried to look for some way, any way to get away. He needed to clear his head somehow. He ran into the shadows of the taller buildings and sank down to the ground. He was tired. Tired of it all. Tired of his own feelings and the way life could never be kind to him.

"They're going to notice you're missing," a kind voice said to him.

Cloud looked up to see Zack blue-violet eyes smiling down at him. "Come on, Cloud. You don't want to get into trouble."

"I don't think I care anymore," Cloud murmured.

Zack only smiled. "I was on my way to see you, because Sephiroth was worried about you. Of course, he wouldn't use the word 'worried,' but I know these things."

"I... I don't know what to do."

"You don't have to tell me what's wrong, but there is something I need from you," Zack grinned.

"What?"

"I want you to smile more, kid. I want things to be resolved. So come with me. I'm taking you into ShinRa Headquarters."

Cloud's eyes widened. "Why are we going there?"

"I'm sure you've noticed that the First Class members and higher ranking officers have been moved from place to place a lot. Well, they finally made room for us in ShinRa Headquarters. We aren't supposed to move in yet, but we can check the place out. Oh, and Sephiroth has a room there now too. They really like to keep an eye on the guy."

Cloud stood. "Is he there now?"

Zack nodded. "Of course. I'm going to take you to resolve things with him. He wanted to talk to you in private. He didn't say much more. And I'll be honest, Cloud. I suggested headquarters because you can't run away from there."

Cloud sighed, and let Zack pull him out of the shadows.


It was easy for Zack to make his way through the large building. He had a new card key and a new metal key and a new code for keypads. He seemed to know the place very well already. Cloud would have taken more interest in the building had it not been for the fact that he had run from Sephiroth only a few hours earlier. It still hurt him.

Finally, when they were high enough in the building, they found the floor for the First Class members. Zack passed those rooms, and led Cloud down a few dark halls. Finally, they came to a hallway for special senior officers. Sephiroth's room was the tenth. Zack smirked and opened the door without knocking and suddenly pushed Cloud in.

"Here he is!" Zack grinned.

"Thank you," Sephiroth smiled, staring out the window with his back to the two young men.

The place was amazing. It was decorated in rich colors; dark blues and gold for the living room and dining room. And the bedroom was burgundy and gold. Sunlight poured in through the windows in the dining room and kitchen, and silk and crystal and marble was everywhere.

Zack stuck his tongue out at Cloud and shut the door, leaving Cloud and Sephiroth alone.

"I'm sorry about earlier," Cloud said immediately.

Sephiroth turned to him and nodded. "There is nothing for you to be sorry for. I was going to give you time to think, but I thought it would be best if I talked to you sooner."

Cloud shook his head and placed his face in his hands. He didn't hear Sephiroth approach, but the young general's hands grasped his shoulders from behind, and Cloud let himself be pushed into some unknown direction. When he let his mind clear, he found that he was in the bedroom, and the door was shut behind them.

"Zack has good hearing," Sephiroth said. "It's better if we talk in here in case he remains right outside for a while."

Cloud felt trapped. He didn't know what to talk about. He didn't know how to apologize for leaving or if he should really apologize. He only stared at the floor, not caring about his future or whether or not anyone would notice he was missing from the barrack. He stopped caring about so many things.

"I feel... trapped," Cloud said, his voice giving away the ache in his heart. "I... I don't know what to do. It hurts," he said, and he turned to the door, the way to run away again.

Strong arms wrapped around him from behind, and he froze in place, feeling that he could lose his mind at any moment. One of Sephiroth's hands rested on his stomach, and the other right over his heart.

"I need you to extend me the same courtesy I gave to you," Sephiroth whispered. "Give me a moment of complete openness and trust."

Cloud exhaled slowly and nodded, his eyes wide with surprise and his heart sinking with the fear that Sephiroth would expose something about him that he didn't want exposed. Now, he was afraid of the powerful man. But at the same time, he felt that he, himself, deserved more pain for never being able to make himself happy.

"I'll tell you anything. I'll do anything. I'll be honest. I give my word," Cloud said very softly. If Sephiroth wanted him to go away forever, he would do it. If he wanted him to live on for any reason, he would do it. He do anything for the man his heart longed for, even if they could never be together.

Sephiroth's breath hit his ear softly, and Cloud nearly shivered. He felt small and powerless now. He was afraid of opening up to anyone without picking and choosing what he'd say. He felt the young general's arms release him, and he turned around slowly, his eyes lowered. A gentle hanucheuched his cheek gently, and for a moment he held his breath.

"Look at me," Sephiroth said, wanting to see if Cloud was well.

Cloud looked up and saw Sephiroth's face in it's normal tranquility. Their eyes remained locked, and Cloud got lost in those glowing pools. Too lost to notice how close the young general was until their lips touched. Cloud's first response was to pull away as if he had done something g, bg, but Sephiroth caught him and pulled him into his arms, holding the young blonde's body tight against his own. Cloud slowly surrendered, and kissed back deeply. In a moment of courage, he entered Sephiroth's mouth with his tongue, tasting the one he had desired for years. The young general opened up to him without hesitation. When the kiss broke, Cloud felt light-headed.

"Why--" Cloud began, but he lost his words when Sephiroth's lips touched his neck.

"Are you a rough or gentle person Cloud?" Sephiroth asked softly, his hands traveling down Cloud's back.

Cloud swallowed, and wrapped his arms around the other young man, letting his fingertips run through the silver strands. "Rough..." Cloud whispered.

As soon as the word left his mouth, he felt himself being backed up against the wall as Sephiroth planted rough kisses down the side of his neck. Cloud breathed harder and Sephiroth felt him squeeze his shoulders. The young general bit down on the soft skin, and Cloud made an nearly inaudible sound of approval. Cloud liked the paint adt added to pleasure. It felt good when Sephiroth's mouth worked to leave a deep red mark on his neck, and it felt even better to feel his teeth on his flesh.

Sephiroth helped Cloud to undress, because the young blonde was far too dazed to do it himself. His hands were shaking, and he felt so lost. Cloud didn't even remember how all of his clothes came off, but soon he was standing there, completely exposed. And now, part of him felt ashamed. Sephiroth, who was still fully dressed, could see all of him now, and he was clear-headed enough to see everything without the demon‘s influence.

"You're nervous," Sephiroth said softly. He took Cloud by the hand and led him to the large bed with it's burgundy silk sheets. Cloud lied down, and Sephiroth sat next to him on the edge of the bed, letting his hand caress Cloud's strong stomach and chest. Cloud trembled there, not used to the tender attention. Usually people just bent him into position and fucked him raw. They usually didn't treat his body as though it were worth anything. And now that someone was treating him with such tenderness, he felt fear. He even felt self-conscious now that someone was examining him so thoroughly.

Sephiroth's hand wrapped around Cloud's erection, and the young blonde's eyes shot open. The young general said nothing, and only gazed down at him with understanding eyes. Cloud was almost glad that Sephiroth kept his clothes on, or he would be even more nervous.

Cloud moaned softly as Sephiroth began to stroke him. It was as if the silver-haired young man knew exactly what to do and where to put enough pressure to make Cloud feel as good as possible. Cloud squirmed on the bed, feeling as though it were the first time anyone had ever touched him there.

The weight of the bed shifted and Sephiroth's hand pulled away. The young general walked to the foot of the bed, then moved back onto it, meeting Cloud's eyes the whole time.

He wouldn't... Cloud thought to himself. I‘m dreaming....

Sephiroth's hand grasped Cloud again, and the blonde moaned as the pleasurable pressure returned. Silver hair spilled around the bed and surrounded Cloud's body, and Cloud grasped the deep red sheets as his back arched from the bed. Sephiroth was doing what Cloud had only dreamed of as he slowly tasted the tip of Cloud's hard member. The young blonde moaned softly as Sephiroth's free hand caressed his body gently. Cloud was beyond excited, and the young general had only begun.

Sephiroth slowly took Cloud into his mouth, almost making the young blonde scream at the teasing. Soon he felt more the strong hand move in rhythm with the warm mouth that took him in. Cloud his his eyes fall on the young general, and the scene was almost too much for him to handle. This man could make Cloud do whatever he wished, yet he chose to pleasure the young teen. Cloud shut his eyes, but it was too late. He wasn't going to last much longer with everything that was happening.

"I can't take it," Cloud moaned. "I'm going to come."

Sephiroth didn't respond. He only continued, and soon he felt Cloud's body tense, and the young blonde released into his mouth. Sephiroth swallowed, his hands moving up and down Cloud's body, and he let his mouth linger for a short moment longer. When he pulled away, he looked down at the young teen who was breathing heavily.

"Just relax," Sephiroth said softly as he rested weigweight on Cloud. He kissed the young blonde's lips gently, then made his way down to his neck, his chest, his stomach, then to the softening member.

"I want to see you," Cloud whispered, fingering the material of Sephiroth's clothing. "Please."

The bed creaked as Sephiroth got up, his hand caressing Cloud's cheek before he left the bed completely. Cloud watched eagerly as the layers of clothing were shed, leaving a perfect, strong, beautiful man standing nude in front of him. Sephiroth's silver hair seemed to have a light of it's own, and his entire body looked so powerful. And now Cloud remembered the moment he saw the young general under the waterfall.

Sephiroth walked over to the bed slowly and rested his body on top of Cloud again. Cloud shut his eyes and shivered as their naked bodies touched. The young general propped himself up on his forearms and looked into Cloud's eyes.

"Let me show you what it's like now," Cloud said.

Sephiroth shook his head and smiled softly. "This isn't for me. You're the focus now. Besides, I can't feel the kind of pleasure you can. You must understand that I do this to make you feel good, because you matter to me."

"What did they do to you?" Cloud asked, sliding his hand through Seothoth's hair.

"Many things that you should never know about. They did anything they could to make sure that my body wouldn't react to anything."

"...You're doing this all for me?"

"I am."

"I thought you said their were too many consequences."

"You wanted a night with no consequences."

Cloud nodded, but had one more burning question. "Where did you learn to do... all of that?"

Sephiroth kissed Cloud softly. "Things like this kiss, come natural. Everything else was done to me before in a manner I didn't like. I was forced to learn everything that felt pleasurable when I was far too young, only so they could deny me the ability to feel pleasure ever again. It felt good physically, but mentally and emotionally, it was part of the hell that was my life. I wanted to give you the intimacy that no one ever let me experience."

"It's not fair. I want to help you feel this," Cloud said, loving the way Sephiroth's weight pressed against him.

"It only bothers me because I can't make you feel as much as I want to. I can't take this far enough to truly make you feel the most pleasure."

"Trust me," Cloud smiled softly. "This is perfect."

"...Just don't tell your mother."

"Only you would be able to slip in a joke about my age at a time like this," Cloud smirked. "Yve bve been hanging around Zack too long."

Sephiroth rested his forehead against Cloud's. "My social interactions are not your concern right now," he said, rubbing his nude body against Cloud's. His hand slid down Cloud’s body, and his finger lightly pressed against Cloud's tight entrance.

"Yes sir," Cloud moaned softly as Sephiroth slid down his body to pleasure him again.

~~~~~~~~~~

It had been hours. Zack walked down the halls of ShinRa Headquarters with a spring in his sted a d a song on his lips. He just had dinner and his energy was building. He smiled without knowing it, and headed for Sephiroth's room to see if Cloud was ready to go (or if he had already left).

The door opened suddenly and Cloud was jokingly pushed outside as soon as Sephiroth heard Zack's singing near the door.

"Here he is," Sephiroth smiled.

"Thank you," Zack said with a grin as he pulled a very dazed looking Cloud on his way out of the building. "So is everything resolved?" he asked as soon as they were outside.

Cloud could only smile.

~*~*~*To Be Continued*~*~*~
(Coming up next... Nibelheim. I know these sexual scenes aren't as graphic as the ones I had in my other story. But if you did read my Tainted Eyes story, you'd know that Sephiroth has trouble expressing what his body wants for a long time. But I plan on making a sequel to that story with Cloud and Sephiroth included again, and trust me, those bedroom scenes will be a LOT more graphic. XD )