Ceaseless Oblivion

For all those that want to know, I write this story to Coldplay, particularly "The Scientist" and "Clocks" to the sadder parts. The parts with friendship that include Zack, Genesis and Angeal was a favorite to "Dig" by Incubus. The theme song, I feel, is "Brand New Day" by Forty Foot Echo, for it talks about a day with new chances, and for seeing more in a person. Also, "Reach" by Caleigh Peters was a favorite when Cloud was struggling with his wings and abilities, and as of late, "Here is Gone" by Goo Goo Dolls is a good theme song for CloudxSephiroth. And of course, "Through the Glass" by StoneSour is an excellent song for when Sephiroth wants to be like Cloud, and when Cloud was so bent on becoming like Sephiroth.

Two things: In this chapter, there will be forgiveness in the form of Aeris and Sephrioth. I find this plausible, for she is no longer a human in a sense, but rather a spirit and free entity of the Promised Land. Meaning, she holds no grudges for she is now content, with Zack, her children, and the place she will spend eternity in. xXTaintedHopexX thought of one of the things Aeris is going to bring up, and I owe all the credit to that idea to her. (It will be included in my authors note at the end).

The other, is the part with Sephiroth and Cloud in the cave. It's a comfort scene, where I tie up some lose ends with Sephiroth and Cloud's past, and what they once were to the other. I tried to think realistically about if these two were to really do that…and seeing as how they both are changed men, I found this realistic.

Without further ado, the next chapter. I do not own the poem used, Rumi's "I Am a Sculptor of Mold and Form". Also, I own nothing grumble grumble, but if I did…I'd have Cloud teach me to drive Fenrir, and have Sephiroth teach me the ancient style of his masamune. But alas, I do not.


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To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you. ~Lewis B. Smedes

The last thought Sephiroth recalled, before he slipped into sleep, was that this calm he had with Cloud couldn't last. Nothing did, if there was one thing he knew for certain. Life was all about taking charge and control of the brevity of time, and making the most of it. Sadly, Sephiroth had never truly done that. He could count on one hand the times when he had had a good time, out of his thirty odd some years of life.

Meaning, if this philosophy was correct, that there was nothing to look forward to but a fight with Cloud. Yes, he was being kind to him now, but that was only because he had taken the fall for him in battle. Hell, he would have been kind to someone who had done that, even when he was on Gaia, hell bent on becoming a god.

Angels fell, and though Cloud was now a demi-god in his eyes, someone who could best him in everything and fall to nothing, he was still something who was doomed to time's curse. No one could be kind all of the time, especially to the scum of the earth he was.

Sephiroth felt a sigh slip through his lips, and he rose up from his sleeping position carefully, blinking a few times. The sunlight was blinding, and he wished to tell Cloud, or someone, to turn it off. Wait. The sun?

The silver haired man's eyes opened wide with surprise when he saw that he was in a place other than the cave. All around him, peonies were in full bloom, spreading on the thick emerald grass like waves of diamonds and pink topaz. Sephiroth took a deep breath, and felt the nectar and pollen from the flowers come to his nose. Uncharacteristically, he sneezed.

A laugh resounded through the glade, bouncing off of the ground like droplets of water. "Bless you!"

Sephiroth opened his eyes as wide as they could go, and he found that someone was sitting a few meters away from him. It was a person that he never thought that he would see again, much less be allowed in the presence of. Wasn't there some sort of rule that dictated that murderers were never allowed to look at their victims in the afterlife, even if the afterlife was a field of flowers?

There was Aeris, in all of her seraphic wonder, sitting right beside him. The sunlight bathed her body in a bronze glow, giving her features a kind and soothing look, as if she were the goddess of spring herself, the Persephone from Greek legend. She was not in the outfit he had seen her last in, the outfit he killed her in, but rather, a dark green sundress. Her hair was not up and bound back like it had always been on earth, disguising the materia she had in her ribbon, for she let it fall in copper waves around her face, escalating down her back in weaves of auburn.

Sephiroth put his hand on the ground, and felt as if he were about to be sick, pass out, or both. Aeris looked at him, her emerald eyes opening wide in alarm..

"Sephiroth? What's the matter?" Sephiroth felt as if his life were flashing before his eyes then, for this was surely Hell. Hell was a place that would lead you into a false sense of security, a place that would show you paradise, glimpses of Heaven and flights of fancy. Then, like the demons they were, they would pull the rug from underneath you and send you, screaming and grasping the air, into the Eternal Fire Pit, never to emerge.

Aeris reached for him, and her hand brushed his arm. Sephiroth reeled away from the touch, and looked around, first at the pale blue sky with rolling white clouds, and then to the earth itself. At any moment, the sky would split open in halves and fall away in shambles of firmament, destroying any chance he would have of Heaven, or the Promised Land. The Goddess had lied to him, and sent him on a fool's errand, sending him all the way through oblivion and abyss, only to let the one who looked like an angel through the Final Gate, Cloud himself. The ground would break open and reveal skeletal and charred flesh, demons with forked tongues and curved horns, and reach for him. He would not be their master, but rather their pet in Hell.

"Just do it now! Just take me now!" He screamed this to no one, and everyone. Aeris touched his shoulder then, and he shook in his skin, waiting for the moment when her lovely features would turn into a monster as well. She seemed to know that he was in distress.

"Sephiroth. Look at me, please." Look at her, just as she was going to turn into a thing that would put the ingredients of nightmares to shame? "Sephiroth. I'm not going to turn into a monster, a demon, or something evil. You are safe here. You are dreaming." This made Sephiroth look up, from his curtain of silver hair that fell around his face. He was met with gentle and wise features, as if he were staring into the face of Minerva herself.

Something in him clicked. Of course…a dream. Zack had come to him before, and before he was…better, he had thought that Zack had become a vengeful spirit, one who wished to tear out his throat for killing his first love. That had not been, for he was true and real, and only wished to help him. Every time Zack had left, he mentioned Aeris and some little ones that had to be taken care of. It would make sense, that at some point, he would have had to talk with her about what had gone wrong in the past.

Sephiroth breathed a sigh of relief, and felt a wave of indescribable guilt wash over his soul. He was sitting with the woman he had killed, in cold and vile blood. She was going to want answers, an apology…an apology! The thought almost made him laugh hysterically out loud. As if words could heal old wounds. Words, and a pitiful apology could not erase the past, scrubbing it out as if it never was. The words would be no better than sand, than ash.

"Sephiroth? Did you hear me?" Sephiroth took a deep breath, and straightened himself out. He looked to his body and saw that he was in his normal clothing, a black attire that had become his entire wardrobe the six odd some months he was stuck in oblivion. He brushed through his hair, and faced the woman who was a saint on Gaia, a martyr to some, and a healer to all. Aeris Gainsborough, the last of the Ancients, here in the Promised Land at last. And beside her? Sephiroth, the man who had forsaken humanity itself, just to prove that he was a god, all on the whims of his "mother". He was a nightmare, side by side with a nightingale, with the maker of sweet dreams. Opposites did not belong!

Briefly, he got a flash of the time he had met with Genesis and Angeal. They had made two colors, red and white, come together in a flurry of shades, creating a pink rose. Opposites, in that manner, could coalesce and work together to create something beautiful. However, that was only in theory. There was no rule that said that just because he felt repentance and guilt in his heart, that Aeris would forgive him, or even give him more than a passing glance. Things were always better in theory.

Besides, he told himself while building up a wall, who says you need her forgiveness?

A bitter gall rose to Sephiroth's mouth, but he forced himself to swallow it down. This was the present, and the time for tripping through memories was spent. He had to deal with it.

Sephiroth nodded and turned to face Aeris. "Yes, I heard you. I am meeting with you outside of the Promised Land, yes?" Aeris nodded, and a small smile lit her features. Despite it barely being a stretch of the lips, her entire body lit up with an internal glow, as if sunlight were beneath her bones, and wanted to get out. It made him blink a few times, afraid of being blinded by it. It was said that angels possessed enough beauty to blind people, and that there were lands in the ancient times, lands with creatures of myth and legend, that were supposed to blind any mortal who tripped into them on accident or whim, since the beauty it possessed was blinding.

"Yes. This is not the Promised Land, but a place where we can be safe, and talk in private for a little while." Aeris switched her position on the ground, and she hummed a little while she moved, as if the simple motion made her want to sing. She enjoyed the finery in life he saw. She looked up at him, and cleared her throat. "Now, would you like to have a serious conversation with me?" Sephiroth felt his heart palpitate nervously between his ribs. Still, he had to man up. He nodded.

"Yes…Aeris…why are you even speaking with me?" Her eyes clouded over in confusion, and she cocked her head to the side, as if she could not believe that those words had left his mouth.

"Why wouldn't you?" Sephiroth sighed.

"I killed you, that's why." A moment of silence followed his words, in which Sephiroth wondered why the Goddess would place him here of all places. Aeris shook her head, as if she were waving away an accusation.

"Sephiroth…may I say something?" Sephiroth nodded his head once, not trusting his voice. Had he been his old self, he would have been wondering what would be the best way to kill her a second time, for she was nothing more than a foolish girl, one who wished to plague him in his afterlife. However…he was not that person anymore, and would allow her to say what she desired.

"Go ahead." Aeris smiled gently, and caught his eyes. He didn't think he would be able to look away if he tried.

"I knew you were going to kill me, back on Gaia. I knew that when I went to cast Holy, that it would be at the expense of my own life. However, I still had to do it. The Planet told me that I would be safe, and that a moment of pain would be worth its weight in promises." Sephiroth blinked three times, and felt as if his entire life was an illusion. Did she just say…that she knew that she was going to die? Aeris nodded her head, as if she could read his thoughts and was answering his questions in gestures.

"Yes, I knew. Still, I would do it, for the sake of the Planet. That's why, I was smiling when you struck me down, for I knew that I would help the entire world, at the cost of my life. I was tired of being a foolish little girl, and more than ready to help the world in need." Sephiroth found his spirit touched by this girl-no, woman's-sacrifice. She was selfless, to the very end, even when she knew that if she kneeled before that altar, that she was going to be killed, by the monster that he had once been.

"Also, I had a feeling that one day, you would come to see the error in your ways, and tell me that you were sorry." She looked away from him then, as if she were trying to count the tops of the peonies, one by one. Then, she looked back at him. "And that day has come." Sephiroth took a deep breath, and wondered if this would be foolish of him. Words…couldn't change anything. However, if there was one thing he learned from Cloud, it was that through communication, and making an effort to speak and share words, was where progress, constructive madness as he put it, was born. Meaning, he was now going to tell the woman he had killed that he was sorry.

Sephiroth caught her eye, and slowly, slowly, lowered his head. Aeris protested, but he silenced her.

"I am bowing to you, for you have played a part in saving Gaia, the Planet that you could commune with. Through your death that my hands caused, the world was healed. Also…you took away the evil that was Geostigma, with your water and hope. Aeris…I am sorry. I am sorry that I killed you, though it is too late to take it back now. I am sorry that I caused Geostigma, and wished to become a god, and kill all those in my way. I am sorry that I lay so many things to waste…with my hands and blade. And I am sorry that you had to be killed because of my recklessness and shortsightedness. Can you…forgive me?" Good gods, he had actually done it! He had spoken those foolish words, words that would have no such thing as meaning, or change. However, despite the outcome, he had done it. He had asked for forgiveness, repented, and said he was sorry. Never in his life had he ever done such a thing.

A warm hand touched his head, and Sephiroth looked up from the curtain of his hair. Aeris then took his chin in her hands, caught his eye, and nodded.

"Sephiroth, I knew it was going to happen. Meaning, if one knows they are going to be killed, then who is to say that there is something to forgive?" Sephiroth felt as if his mind was whirling then. That meant…could it mean…?"Sephiroth. I forgive you." Sephiroth felt his eyes open wide, and he looked to the earth, not sure what to do now. He looked to the ground, and admired the colors, knowing that soon, he would wake up in a colorless place. No, not colorless exactly…just lightless. However, there was someone there who was his light, someone there who colored the world in a sapphire glow.

Aeris then chuckled. "Thinking about him?" Sephiroth snapped his head up, and caught Aeris's eye.

"Who?" She smiled and looked around her, as if she were once again admiring this land. She reached forward and took a peony from the blossom, not from the root up. This would enable for the flower to grow back easily, since she didn't recklessly tear it from the ground.

"He loves you…he loves you not…" Aeris began throwing the flower petals all around, and Sephiroth understood what she was doing. She was not taunting him, but rather…celebrating.

In a choked voice, he spoke. "How…did you know I foster…feelings for Strife?" Aeris looked up at him and smiled.

"I've been watching you, along with my husband and friends. The progress you two have made is extremely impressive, and I hope that soon, Cloud will know exactly what you feel for him. That's what love is after all: a willingness to sacrifice your own well being for the sake of another." Sephiroth remembered throwing himself in front of that creature, hell bent on destroying it because it dared to harm Cloud. He really was a changed man, for never, ever would he have sacrificed his own well being in order to save someone else.

Aeris smiled, and threw the final petal to the ground. "He loves you." Sephiroth looked to where her empty hands, and she smiled. "Also…yes, I forgive you. My heart does not foster anger, vengeance, or resentment towards you, Sephiroth. Even when you managed to come back to life a third time, and wreck havoc on the Planet again…I felt something else for you. Pity." This made Sephiroth's hand clench. Still, he didn't like it when people pitied him. However, if he didn't want that emotion, then he supposed he should have kept his mouth shut when Cloud was looking at his wound before he slept. If he cared with putting on airs, or in keeping a fanfare around him, then he wouldn't have said a word. Though, since he did speak, he realized that he wanted Cloud to know about his feelings, his emotions. It's what…friends did.

All of this gave Sephiroth a headache. Still, he managed a few words. "Thank you…Aeris. I'm not sure if I deserve your forgiveness." She shook her head, but he continued. "Also…say I did care for Strife in the manner of which you speak. What then? It's not like he could ever feel the same in return. I was a monster to him."

"That's where you're wrong Sephiroth. All you really have to do is let Cloud know of your intentions, and your own feelings. Also…you need to learn to forgive yourself, more than anything else. That's when the true healing begins." Aeris turned to him, and placed her hand on his chest, with bravery. Only someone who truly trusted him would dare to touch him. "Sephiroth…deep in your heart, you are a changed man. Also, since you have my forgiveness, Zack's, Genesis's, and Angeal's as well, all that is left is for you to see if Cloud cares enough to forgive you as well. Then, remember that there are people here who care for you, and are rooting for you to come to the Promised Land." Sephiroth looked to Aeris's face, and saw that through her time in the Promised Land, she had become someone truly wise, and had become a compassionate soul for all. Hell, she was willing to touch him and give him advice.

"T-thank you. I will remember that. Also…I will try to forgive myself for the things I have done. If I can throw myself in front of a hideous creature who wanted to rip my face off, I guess I can forgive myself." Aeris chuckled and sat back in her spot.

"You've gotten funnier. That's a good sign." Him, funny? That would be the day. "Seriously, you are silly. It is good to have a sense of humor. I see that you and Cloud have been laughing a lot, and are willing to do for each other. For example, Cloud is currently coming back from finding another shelter for you. Also, you cared enough for him to revive him when the poison in the system almost stopped his heart. That should be enough evidence to prove that you are different." Sephiroth digested her words. She really was a remarkable woman. He was glad that there were no regrets with her at least. There would be one, a huge one, if he would not key in Cloud to his own feelings of him.

It was insane talk he knew, thinking of Cloud in such a way. However, in a way, his friends were being his cheerleaders in their relationship. If they weren't doing that, he would have backed off long ago, for they seemed to know what was to be in his future, and in the future of him and Cloud. It was crazy to think that those that had watched him become a nightmare to the world would support his feelings of the hero who brought the daybreak from the nightmare. He sighed aloud.

"Again, thank you. You have my gratitude Aeris, for forgiving me, and for telling me such wise words." She smiled and turned around, as if she heard someone approaching. A small girl, one who was undoubtedly her daughter, came forth from a pool of golden sunlight, holding a small little boy in her arms. He was a beautiful child with jet black hair that was beginning to spike up around his forehead and ears.

"Momma!" The girl ran towards Aeris and sat by her, grinning away. She would be beautiful when she grew up, for her hair was the exact same shade as Aeris's. Her eyes were light blue like her fathers, and she wore a light blue sundress, contrasting her mothers emerald attire. She swung her head back and forth, making her braided pigtails swing in the wind she created. "Darien wants you I think." She handed the little boy to Aeris, and a tender look crossed her features when she touched her son. Aeris adjusted the small boy who was sucking on his fingers on her lap, and gave Sephiroth a look.

"Elmrya, meet an old friend of mine, Sephiroth Crescent." Crescent? Oh, that's right. His mother's last name. That caused a pinprick of pain to touch his heart, and he wondered if he would ever meet her for real. Elmrya looked up at him wide eyed.

"Hello!" She thrust her hand out, unafraid. She had her father's friendliness. Sephiroth took her hand, and shook it, feeling as if he had fallen into the Twilight Zone. Here he was, sitting beside a woman he had killed, while he was shaking her daughter's hand. The world really could change in the blink of an eye.

"Pleased to meet you." The girl giggled and stood up.

"Mother, can I go play with my friends now?" Aeris nodded and the girl waved before running back into the sunlight. Sephiroth looked to where the girl was running and saw the silhouettes of many other children with her. If he looked closely, he saw that there were houses around them, down a valley, and there were mountains all around. It was a slice of heaven, a piece of paradise itself.

Aeris looked to the child in her lap and kissed his face. "Sephiroth, meet Darien. And you have met Elmrya." She chuckled and bounced the child on her lap. Sephiroth looked once more to the child, and knew that miracles were at work here. They had to be if Aeris was alive and well in the Promised Land with Zack, and they were married with children. They were both martyrs, and they were allowed to find happiness. Through suffering emerged some wonderful people, and an excellent part of the Promised Land.

The Cetra saw that Sephiroth was hesitant to speak, so she chuckled softly. "Sephiroth, I trust you. You aren't who you once were. You're someone…nicer, friendlier, and funnier. Meaning, I can trust you to do this." She stood up and handed Sephiroth Darien, a child who may have been one at the most. Sephiroth tensed. Talking with this woman, meeting her daughter was one thing…but holding her son? That was madness! What woman would trust her past murderer that much?

"Go on. He won't bite. Not until he begins teething that is." Sephiroth opened his hands and placed the child on his lap. He felt the child's warmth, and breathed in a fresh scent, that of laundry and something uncannily sweet. He never thought that he would be a father, or would have children of his own. Darien looked up at him with bright, inquisitive green eyes. He reached with his hands towards Sephiroth's hair, and tugged once. He released it then, and looked at Sephiroth's chest, face and hands, as if he were sizing him up. How such a small person could have so much personality was beyond Sephiroth.

Aeris chuckled beside him. "He likes you. See? He is an excellent judge of character." Sephiroth held the child as if it were made of porcelain, afraid that it would fall from his lap and cry. "Also, relax a little bit. I know this must be hard for you…but babies are both easy and hard to take care of. Even if you let him crawl around, he will be fine." Sephiroth touched the child's head, and Aeris nodded. "You can touch him, you know?" He then stroked the child's hair, and felt that it was very smooth.

"I guess…anything is possible. You forgive me, and I'm holding a child in my lap. Cloud is helping me, and I sacrificed my own well being for him…because I care for him." Even saying the man's name made a flush rise to his skin. He bounced the child on his leg, and the child giggled, his face scrunching up in a smile, one that was so adorable, it made Sephiroth's heart soar. Things that used to disgust him made him smile now, and he cared about things like friendship, forgiveness…and love. Love was a big part of it, something he wanted.

Aeris looked up to the sky, and he knew she was hearing something he wasn't. She smiled then, and stood up. Sephiroth gripped Darien and did the same, all the while handing him off to his mother.

"Time for you to wake up, Sephiroth. But please don't forget what I told you. I forgive you, and so do all of your friends. We also care about you and Cloud, and we would be so happy if you two just told each other how you feel." She took his face in his hands, and before Sephiroth could blink, she kissed his cheek. Aeris gripped her child's hands in her own, and waved him goodbye, with a smile on her lips. "Take care, Sephiroth."

It was there that Sephiroth knew that his earlier philosophy had been wrong. Things were not brief, for there was always the afterlife to look forward to. There was always a storm before the calm.

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Sephiroth awoke to silence, and blinked his eyes open, to clear the visions from his head. There were no more peonies surrounding him, nor was there sunlight to cast light on the shadows. There was however, shelter in the form of a cave, as well as a soft enough leaf bed to soothe his back. There was no warmth from Aeris's touch, nor the heat from her child on his lap. It was alright though, for he was forgiven.

Him! Forgiven! It was a miracle if there ever was a miracle. He had done…so, so much to harm the Planet. If he were suddenly to go back to Gaia, he would not be surprised had millions of people ran screaming from him, the way that they did when he came back a third time, to wreak havoc and to have a field day watching slaughter and blood be spilled. Also, there would be people who would gather around him, and sacrifice their own life and well being only to bestow him with ultimate pain. They wanted their revenge on him, for he was nothing more than a villain and a false hero.

But, somehow, all of that had changed. It didn't matter anymore about what Gaia thought about him, for he knew that some legacies and stains could not be erased. Deep in his body, he knew that there would be no such thing as returning to the Planet. And that was just fine with him. Oblivion suited him, just so long as there were people who came in who cared about him.

That was another thing that was beyond his grasp. People cared about him! Before, he preferred his own company, for it was often more ideal than others. Ceaseless prattle and chatter irritated him, and he often wondered why he allowed Zack to be his friend, along with Genesis. The man, even in the afterlife, never did stop talking in riddles and rhymes. However, now, he craved company like he had never craved anything in his life. Like he had stated once before, even the bravest of souls was nothing in the dark. He was no monster who could thrive in abyss, and leech off of the blackness of the sky and ground, as if it were sustenance for his body. He was nothing but a man who had learned that the way he had lived his life had been completely wrong, and was condemned to darkness. However, it was to teach him a lesson, no matter how painful it had been.

Sephiroth shuddered thinking of all of the things he had been subject to to bring him this far. He had endured a mental torture that the Goddess bestowed, as well as a lot of meetings with faces of his past. Also, Cloud was a huge part of this vindication of his spirit and soul, for without him, he would have long since gone mad in this place.

Again, people cared about him. Genesis and Angeal cared about him, despite the ways he had treated them on Gaia. Genesis had the nerve and courage to smile to him even when he had caused him to deteriorate, from the wound he had given him. Angeal was concerned for him and his honor, even when he refused to go after Genesis after he was deemed MIA. Sephiroth now understood why Angeal had been so concerned for the man when he had suddenly gone missing, seeking the Goddess's ultimate treasure and destiny of a hero. It was all because he was in love with him.

It caused a gall to rise to his mouth, and he resisted the urge to retch from it. If his regrets about his friends and the people he harmed would cause him to throw up, he would have been sick for hours on end. Sephiroth shook his head. All that mattered, was that he had finally, finally learned his lesson.

Sephiroth sat up, and considered what Aeris had told him. She forgave him also! It caused a sliver of pain to slip into his chest, where his heart was beating naturally, without mania or a wild apprehension. He touched the skin tenderly, remembering her words. He had killed her so cruelly, falling from the ceiling in the Forgotten City of the Ancient's, bent on killing the one little girl who stood in his way.

For a minute, he was back there, swirling from the heavens like a dark angel who wanted to cause chaos and pandemonium in the land. Masamune slipped through her ribs, but he knew that she did not die right away. His hands shook as he remembered the way he had leered to a shocked and heart broken Cloud, for he had done what he had come to do. Sephiroth bent over and took a few deep breaths. Memory was as much an inebriation as it was a poison.

All that mattered right now, was that she forgave him. And if she, the woman he had killed could forgive his wicked acts, then who was to say that he could not do the same? All he had to do was live for something positive, and promise himself that he would never, ever do such crimes against humanity again. Then, if he did that, he could deem himself worthy of being in the Promised Land.

Sephiroth felt a slight prick of pain hit his side, where he was wounded, and remembered how he acquired such a pain. This wound, and the scar it may or may not leave, would have been his wound of utmost selflessness. Hell, if he could take a knife and mark up his entire body with scars, just to prove that he had changed and that he would never, ever do such atrocities again, he would do so. However, that would do nothing but leave a bloodied blade and scars all over him, not having anything come of it.

He had gained this wound by feeling a monster's wrath, and by having a hand impale him. All for Cloud. The name sent a delicious shiver running through his chest, and a flame of lust hit his body. Goose bumps lined his skin, and he resisted the urge to slip his hand in between his thighs and…

No! He would not succumb to that. Besides, Cloud was much more than some pretty eye candy that he could jerk off to whenever the mood suited him. He was a man who had prevailed in saving humanity three times, a man who was a hero.

In Sephiroth's mind, he saw Cloud standing on a cliff side, donned in armor and a jeweled crown, leading his kingdom to victory. He would have made a good prince, and a just king, just like the fabled King Arthur in the legend of Camelot. He would have such a thing as a Round Table, in which all of the men who sat at it would be on equal standing, in their opinions and words. Yes, he would have made a good General of SOLDIER as well, someone who would have taken the liberty to stand against Rufus Shinra and all of the Turks who used the power of the Lifestream to fuel the world.

Plus, the good thing about that fancy, was that Cloud was a hero. He had no doubt that some sort of monument was being made at that very moment to celebrate Cloud's selflessness and ability to throw away all of his emotions, simply to save everyone he cared about. He was a martyr for the cause, a saint really.

In that moment, Sephiroth felt the last traces of his envy for the man ebb away, as if they had never inflicted a green tint on his skin because of that hideous monster of jealousy. There was no need to be jealous over Cloud. Jealousy, he figured, could cause one of two things. The first, would cause the host to become infected with the disease the monster gave him, and hatred would come whereas there was only once awe and admiration. The second, of which Sephiroth was feeling at this moment, was only a longing to take that envy and awe, and to turn it into something better. He wanted to be just like Cloud now, instead of Cloud wishing to be like his old General self. Meaning, jealousy could be used to overcome someone's faults, and to pave a legacy that was shimmering in gold, just like their idols.

He chuckled aloud. He really had changed.

A sound like air in between feathers made Sephiroth look to his right, and he saw Cloud landing on the grass outside of the cave. Cloud had in his hands a deer, a plump buck whos eyes were closed in the defeat of death. Cloud walked over to the opening of the cave, and Sephiroth was struck dumb, deaf, and stupid at how handsome the man looked right then.

He looked like an ancient warrior who had returned to his village with a good kill, for he made as formidable a hunter as he did a fighter on the battle field. It seemed like there was nothing he could not do. Also, it didn't help Sephiroth's growing attraction that the man's every feature was highlighted with the sapphire hue of his skin, something that was a constant in this land, all of the months they had traveled. It showed Sephiroth how handsome the man really was, which made him slightly shamefaced. He had been this striking for years, even when he was a teenager and had joined SOLDIER. The chance had been his back then to try and befriend the boy. Had they done that…then there was no telling what he would have done with the child when he was that young.

However, here, though there was a definite age gap of nine years, it didn't matter. Love knew not a number, age, or appearance. Sephiroth bit his tongue to keep from groaning aloud. Shit. He loved Strife, didn't he?

"Good morning, Sephiroth. Or afternoon…or whatever." Cloud chuckled a little and dropped the deer on the ground gently, as if he meant to give the carcass reassurance even in death. Again, Sephiroth was struck by the man's selflessness and ability to cherish the smallest thing. He was a man, he knew, who would have celebrated the finery in life if he was given the chance.

"Good morning and afternoon, Cloud. I take it the hunt went well." Cloud sat on the ground and began making a fire. Sephiroth reached up to help him, but his wound protested. He winced when he felt the skin and bandages stretch, and he knew that if he ever was going to get well enough to leave this blasted cave, then he was going to have to take better care of himself.

Cloud saw this and quickly made the fire, and walked over to him. "Let me see the cut." Sephiroth moved his arm from his torso, and let Cloud take off his shirt, and open up his bandages. In those moments, Sephiroth thanked anyone who ruled the cosmos then that Cloud kept his eyes on his wound and not his face. His face changed from a multitude of emotions, his lips pursing to show his ecstasy when Cloud's hand stroked his bare skin. His eyes fluttered closed when the man's hair brushed his cheek, for he smelt wonderful. It was no scent like he had smelled before, but the closest he could think was a mix of mint and rain, a dangerous and intoxicating scent.

"Hmm…it looks better. You're healing a little within a few hours. That's just remarkable." Sephiroth then remembered what had happened before Cloud had gone off to look for shelter, as he was redressing the wound once more. He had said that he had wanted to heal normal, and that he…damn…he had fallen asleep with Cloud touching his hand. He bit his tongue when Cloud's hand brushed his lower stomach, for his mind could not help but conceive of Cloud touching something else as well, stroking it with the strength he knew those hands possessed.

Sephiroth forced his thoughts to stay pure, no matter how hard that was. He recalled Cloud gripping his hand, and telling him that he was a miracle for healing so fast. In Cloud's eyes…he was not a freak, not something that had been made from science and the thirst for progress and a perfect monster. He was just a man who happened to heal quicker due to the Jenova in his veins. Her monstrous presence was eradicated, and for that, he was ever grateful he wasn't constantly dealing with a woman who had told him to do this and that, all for her. She was not his mother. Lucrecia was.

In Cloud's eyes, he was not a freak. That was what mattered. It was remarkable how loving someone made you want to be better for that person, and being told that you were not a freak, not some sort of hideous creature like you thought, could make your heart soar.

"Thank you. I'm glad it's healing at least." Cloud mumbled an "Mmm Hmm" as he was unraveling the bandage. Sephiroth winced when Cloud touched a tender region of the cut. "Shit. You'll be the death of me yet, and not this stupid wound." Cloud looked to his face in alarm, and when he saw the amusement there, he chuckled.

"Sorry. I should have said this sooner…tell me if I tie the bandage too tightly, or touch somewhere where it hurts. I don't want you suffering in silence, or at all because I was a moron." Sephiroth chuckled aloud. The man really did have a sense of humor. Again, he was ideal, an angel of a man.

"I will. Also…I wanted to thank you." Cloud unbound the cloth in its entirety, making Sephiroth sit up. The wound was not just on his lower torso after all, but on his back as well. It was remarkable how he was not suffering from some massive injury in his organs or liver, or appendix. He guessed that in itself was a miracle.

"What for?" Sephiroth sat with his legs in a meditative position, and looked backwards at his companion, guardian angel, and love interest.

"For telling me that I was not a freak for healing so abnormally fast. I would have thought that anyone who I had done so much shit to would be instigating me on how I was nothing more than an unwanted monster or something." Silence echoed the cave, and he felt Cloud's hands leave his skin. Damn. Had he been too honest?

After a long moment, Cloud spoke. "Sephiroth…I wouldn't have done that. I might have in the past, because I truly, truly hated you. I can't tell you how much I used to despise you." He seemed to be biting his tongue, holding all of the memories back. Sephiroth made a motion with his hands, urging the handsome blonde to continue. "I blamed you for so much…for Geostigma, Aeris's death, Zack's death, and everything wrong in my life." Sephiroth winced, for he knew that in all reality, he was the reason that the man had not led a life of happiness. He deserved happiness. "But…I saw what you had to go through. You were created on a whim almost, just because some scientists wanted to test soldiering skills on someone. Never were you loved, or told that you were a good boy from your mother or father." Cloud's eyes focused on a spot on the ground, and Sephiroth sensed that he was reluctant to say all of what he needed to. However, it had to be spoken, for silence was too much of a debilitating venom to let it hinder them anymore.

"Cloud…tell me all you need to say. Please." Cloud looked at him once, sighed gently, and continued.

"Also…Jenova controlling you really was not your fault. Her cells were in your blood stream since you were something small in your mother's womb. Meaning, that she was a disease to you…even though she let you heal quicker and have qualities that normal men did not. Hojo and everyone at ShinRa…did that to you…with zero regard for your life. That's so horrible…I can't even think of it without getting mad." Sephiroth watched the change in emotion come over the normally stoic man's face. Cloud's eyes crinkled, almost as if he were thinking of something sad. Then, he became a thing of fury then, his hands shaking and his body quivering, as if he were prepared to tear all of those that were responsible for making him limb from limb. Cloud was…feeling for him!

"Also…Jenova is evil. She controlled you, and made you, a thing who had never known love, have love if only you did little things for her. A death here, and a little impassiveness there, and she had her own pawn. You were just as used as I was, just as all of us were." Cloud looked up suddenly, and caught his eye. His cerulean eyes sparkled then, as if he were in the middle of a revelation. Sephiroth felt his heart leap to his throat then. "You and I…are a lot alike. You and all of my friends are, for in a sense, we were all used. We just saw you as the enemy, for you were the threat at the time. The true threat though, was ShinRa and Jenova herself."

Sephiroth felt that Cloud's words were justifying him right then. His vindication was on this man's lips, in his eyes. It made him want to taste what it was like, to speak words that would set someone free. His eyes traced Cloud's lips then, the smooth pink contours, and he wondered what it would be like, to reach forward, damning the pain of his wound, and gripping Cloud in a kiss. Cloud's legs would wrap around his hips, and they would…

Cloud's words snapped Sephiroth out of his heated thoughts. "Yes, you did awful things. But that was only because you had nothing to lean on, no friend to tell or someone to care if you were suffering. Had I been your friend…had I been someone important to you back then…I would have helped you. I'm not sure what I could have done…but I would have stayed with you when Jenova spoke to you in your mind." He chuckled then, and Sephiroth had never heard a sound, be it melody or instrument, that sounded so beautiful. "I don't know if it would have helped really. But I would have been there for you."

Sephiroth felt a sharp pain squeeze his heart then, and he knew it to be a mixture of guilt and regret for the time that had passed. Cloud could have been the one to save him when he was on Gaia. Though he was significantly younger to him then, a sixteen year old helping a twenty something General, it would have helped. Had someone tried to be a true friend…he would have been saved.

Though, Zack had tried the same thing, and wound up getting shot down by Sephiroth's own defenses. He had tried to stick with him, despite how often he showed that he would have rather been alone, or been training than getting to know Zack. How wrong he had been! Victory was nothing, and ambition and the glory he got was nothing if there was no one to share it with. That was the same with a lot of things he knew, if there was no one to share it with, then there was no point. He supposed that was why a lot of wealthy men were unhappy, for no one truly thought anything about them aside from how much money they had, or how many material possessions they owned. Finery was nothing without having someone to share it with.

Sephiroth blinked a few times, and felt something line his throat. It ached, as if he were suffering from a sore throat, or some illness. It was almost as if…he were about to cry. Shit! No, he couldn't cry! That was…that would have been pitiful.

Cloud, all knowing and seeing Cloud, had seen this. He reached forward and squeezed Sephiroth's shoulder, as if the simple gesture could help him. It would. It showed Sephiroth in words what the man could not say, what words couldn't bring justice to.

"Sephiroth…damn…it's alright now. I-I'm here for you." Sephiroth closed his eyes for a moment, and when he opened them, the world was blurry. Shit. So his eyes betrayed him once again. Cloud saw the two tears fall from his eyes, and without a moment's hesitation, wiped the tears away with his fingers. Sephiroth felt a gasp slip through his lips, and all he saw was Cloud's lips. Those lips could take away the words that he had said in spite. Those lips could take from him, all of the foul things he had ever done. Those lips could save him.

Cloud was so close, he could practically taste the other man's breath. Two inches. Two inches was all it would take for him to close the distance between them in a kiss. However, if he did that, he would shatter what friendship and bond they shared. For now, there was no doubt that they shared a bond, and had a good relationship, no matter if it was caused from this fucked up wasteland of a place.

Sephiroth decided for now, that words were safer than actions. "Thank you, Cloud. Truly. I don't think anyone has ever spoken so kindly to me before. Also…I don't think that I ever would have expected you to tell me things to encourage me. You once said you hated me, and you wanted to be nothing to me, and have absolutely nothing to do with me. I don't blame you." Sephiroth took a deep breath, trying to calm his bastard of a heart. "I'm glad that I can depend on you. Also…rest assured, I will do you no harm, nor if I was given the chance, would I ever repeat my past mistakes, or anything from my past. Jenova is dead to me, and all I want now…is to get to the Promised Land." The last part was a little white lie, for though he wanted the Promised Land, he also wanted something else too. And his name began with the letter C.

Cloud sat before him, now a good twelve inches away. Sephiroth forced himself to look at something other than his lips. If he was to look only at the man's lips…he would lose himself, surely. In order to continue talking, and share this confession, he was going to have to have all of his head, as well as logical thought.

"You, Cloud, in all that you are…you could have saved me. Jenova wouldn't have gotten to me had you been my friend," he said this with regret "back then. If you were with me in my darkest and weakest hours…you could have most certainly saved my life, and spared so many lives and the destruction I caused." Sephiroth then looked to Cloud's left arm. "Geostigma wouldn't have occurred, and your arm would never have been stricken with disease." His voice trembled at the last, but he blinked rapidly, forcing no tears to come. It was bad enough that it had happened the first time, and that he was being so weak right then. The last thing he needed was for him to turn into a sniveling baby in front of someone he wanted to be strong for. Where would be the honor in that?

"What I mean to say Strife…" he braced himself for this, for he knew it would go against so much of who he once was "…is that I am sorry. I am so, so sorry for all that I have put you through. I tortured your mind…made you give me the black materia…damn, I really, really fucked you up. All for my own selfish gain. You are no puppet to me. You are nothing to me…but an idol. I want…to be like you now, instead of the other way around." Sephiroth felt his eyes cloud over with unshed tears, but before they could fall, he felt something encircle his body. Was it…no, it couldn't be…but it was. Yes, Cloud was embracing him.

It was an awkward hug at best, for Cloud hadn't hugged much in his days he knew. However, arms and warmth were all the same for someone who had only been embraced a handful of times. His arms were around Sephiroth's shoulders, which made Sephiroth fall to the right a little. He was right across the man's left shoulder, the arm that he had been responsible for infecting with Geostigma. Good gods, the things he had done to this man…and even still, despite all of that past evil, he was still embracing him. How was it that one person could be so understanding? Oblivion could do that he supposed.

Still, no matter the cause or conduct, Sephiroth squeezed his eyes shut, as if he were trying to hold onto the moment of Cloud holding him, just so that when he was trying to sleep, he could remember this warmth, and fall into peaceful slumber. It was so comforting, and reassuring.

'Dammit. I love you, and you don't even know it.' That was the truth. He loved this man, as crazy as it was to conceive, believe, and think on. Cloud should have been the last person he should have shown his affections to, the last man who he should have been attracted to. However, there was something about him that threw away all logic entirely. Love didn't decide feelings or emotions based on what was best for the person, or based on what logic and reason dictated. Yes, they were once enemies. Yes, he had killed the man's mother and entire village. However, that didn't stop his skin from heating up just thinking about the man, or cause his heart to stop beating so frantically in his chest thinking about kissing him. Was that love? Or was it lust?

No. Lust was what he had experienced with that whore, with that prostitute he had spent a filthy night with, all of those years ago. Lust was what drove men to open their beds to any takers when their own wives or significant others were not being intimate with them. Love was the opposite. Love, despite how warm or cold the bed was, waited until that right person came along who they could give their company and heat for. Love was enduring. It was patient and kind.

What a revelation to be had in the arms of the one you cared for. Sephiroth felt heat line his face, and he wished he could bury his face in Cloud's forearms, memorizing this warmth.

"Sephiroth…it's alright. I understand now…more than I ever did. Shiva…I'm actually sorry that I told you I hated you. Damn…how insensitive I have been to you." Cloud gripped him tighter, almost possessively, in a stance that told Sephiroth that he cared for him fiercely. This was what he had meant when he said that he cherished everything. All those that were loyal to him, he cherished.

"It's not alright. However…it might be someday. Still, I am sorry." Quiet loomed over the pair, and Sephiroth kept his eyes closed still, wondering if he would fall asleep in this man's arms. A question was on his lips, but he was not quick to say it. If he did, the atmosphere would change drastically in the cave. Also, if he alerted to Cloud that he was sure his wound was open and bleeding, then he would have realized how long he had been holding onto him.

Finally, Cloud spoke. "You're right. It's not alright…but one day, it will be. Sephiroth…I wish I could tell you I forgive you. But that would be a lie. I don't want to lie to you. I want to tell you the truth…which is what I did. It's crazy to think that I'm…holding you like this, after all you put me and my loved ones through. However…I feel like this is the right thing to do." Cloud gently let him go then, and Sephiroth regrettably placed his hands on the stone and sat himself upright. So he didn't forgive him. That was alright. It wasn't like he expected him to forgive him.

Though…he knew that others did. Zack had, as did Aeris, the woman who he had killed. If that could happen, then anything was possible. Genesis and Angeal were probably smiling at him right now, from wherever the Hell they were.

Sephiroth sat up, and felt something roll down his hip. Blood. Cloud saw this and gasped aloud.

"Shit…I'm sorry." Without further ado, he took off his shirt, and shredded it with his teeth. The action was so impulsive and shocking, that Sephiroth was sure his mouth was agape. The man's body was ideal before, and he had looked more than once while he was naked he admitted. But that was before he was honest about his feelings for the younger man. Now that he was in the midst of honesty, the man was the most appealing thing he had ever seen.

His pectorals were perfect from all of the protein he had eaten, as well as the consistent morning workouts. Cloud had bulked up a little from all of the meat, and where there had once been skin without muscle, there was now muscle. A lot of it. A faint line of blonde hair fell down his belly button, meeting a world Sephiroth might never know. Just the thought about…that area made his heart speed up. Instead of feeling ashamed for this, for he knew that he was into men, he delighted in this rapture.

Cloud bound the strips on his stomach, and tied it with a knot to keep the blood from flowing out. All the while, he kept telling Sephiroth he was sorry for letting the wound go untouched. Sephiroth had to chuckle at this, for he wondered how a man could spout words of wisdom and kindness one moment, and be such a little boy the next. However, it was one of the things he liked about this man, if he was being honest. His sense of humor, and how he was able to remain innocent, despite all that had been done to him in the past. He really was a true hero, and a wonderful person.

"Does that feel better?" Sephiroth nodded and placed his hands on the floor, to brace his body as he sat up a little.

"Much. Don't worry about it. I'm used to bleeding to death while people are telling me things." Cloud's eyes widened first in alarm, and then in anger. But they softened instantly when he saw that Sephiroth was simply chuckling. He was also fun to instigate and antagonize as well.

"Interesting morning/afternoon, isn't it?" Sephiroth nodded and poked at the buck, wondering if a few minutes would harm the meat. He doubted it. Cloud skinned it with a piece of pointed wood, and as he made meals for each of them, he spoke.

"You know…I meant what I said all that time ago. You can tell me anything. I won't think any less of you. If you have seen me at my lowest, and vice versa, then there is nothing you can tell me that will make me think any less of you. Plus," he said this while looking up at Sephiroth "you saved my life. That entitles you to tell me anything you want. Talk my ear off, or share a memory. I don't care. I just…want to know what you're thinking sometimes." Hold it. Did that mean…no, it didn't. Just because someone wanted to know what you were thinking didn't meant that they were interested romantically in you.

Sephiroth covered up for this discovery with a chuckle. "I rarely talk someone's ear off. But if the situation strikes me, so be it." Cloud handed him a portion of the meat, and while he ate, Cloud told him of the progress he had made in their travels. Sephiroth guessed that it had to do with the mood in the cave, how it had gone from a casual greeting, to a heated confession. Cloud wanted normalcy, friendship. He didn't want for him to be a love interest.

'Love hurts.'

"I found a cave that we can go to, that takes about fifteen minutes in the air to get to. Are you ready for that kind of a flight, being that I opened your wound again?" Sephiroth nodded, and swallowed his food. He imagined that he was swallowing his love, and his attraction for Cloud, and placing it somewhere where he was not reminded of it. However, that was so much easier said than done.

"I can manage it. If it gets us further, you could make me ride a damn chocobo mutant from here to Costa del Sol. I'd do it." Cloud laughed a little, and the sound made his face light up in a smile. He was beautiful when he did that, and the sound only added to the effect of beauty.

"Alright then. Is there anything else you want before we go?" Sephiroth swallowed another bite of meat, and found that his throat ached with dryness. Damn. How had he not noticed how thirsty he was? Usually, had they been traveling, he could have gone and had a drink at anytime he pleased. But, since he was stuck in practically one spot, due to the injury he had sustained trying to help the man he loved, he didn't have that luxury anymore.

"Yes…can I get a drink? I'm dying of thirst." Cloud nodded and stood up, as if he knew exactly what to do. Then it dawned on the man. They had no cups, or anything to hold water in. Being in oblivion, in the middle of nowhere really did not bide well.

Sephiroth noted this, and began to stand up. His legs were stiff from not moving in who knew how long, along with other parts of his body. Traveling would do him some good. Cloud reached for him, and supported him around his right hip, and threw his left arm over his own shoulder.

"Lean on me. I'll walk you to the stream and you can get water easier." Sephiroth was only happy to oblige, if it meant he got to touch Cloud's warm skin again.

Both men walked to the stream slowly, for Sephiroth could not get too far without wincing in pain. He would have been hopeless in battle he knew, which made him really upset. He hated being a burden, and useless. However, the time for digesting ones pride had come, and he was willing to be taken care of, despite how much it killed him.

Cloud sat him down on the bank, and let Sephiroth take as much water as he wanted. It tasted so damn good, he could hardly believe anything could taste that excellent.

After a moment, Sephiroth spoke up. "Thanks for taking me out here. The meat was delicious…but without water, it's really dry." Cloud's face brightened suddenly, as if he had suddenly remembered something that would make his whole life. Hell, Cloud did that already.

"Sephiroth…in that case…I have a surprise for you. I forgot about it until now." He reached around and gripped Sephiroth, raising him to his feet. Sephiroth leaned against him a little too closely, for he didn't really need all of that support. However, this was too good of an opportunity to pass up for. Sephiroth rarely let an opportunity slip through his fingers.

Cloud leaned him against the front of the cave while he put out the fire and buried the bones of their meal. Then, a minute or two later, Cloud's eyes twinkled with a mischief that Sephiroth was alien to. He had never seen Cloud this…jubilant. It was refreshing.

"Just what is this surprise?" Cloud didn't say a word, but brimming excitement was on his face.

"You'll see." And with that, Cloud picked him up, being mindful of his wound, and took to the air. It was so nice to feel the air on his face, and to feel the familiar sensation of flight. Perhaps soon…he would receive the gift of wings as well.

"Thanks for not drowning me in the river." Cloud chuckled.

"Thanks for not weighing hundreds of pounds. I'm not as strong as I look." Sephiroth scoffed at this, causing Cloud to cast a quizzical glance downwards.

"Yes, you are." Still, Cloud wanted him to elaborate. However, if he elaborated, then that would mean that he would have had to key Cloud in that he was looking at his body. If he did that, then it would wreck their friendship, or have the potential to do so. Still, there was no harm in a chance.

"Your arms have muscle on the muscle. I've seen you whirl around Buster like it was little more than a feather, along with the other swords you carried. Plus, you're holding me now, without any signs of strain on your face. That means, that you are definitely as strong as you look." Cloud was quiet for a moment, which made Sephrioth mentally kick himself. Damn. He had let Cloud know he was looking at him, and was aware of muscles on his body.

Then Cloud spoke up. "Well, thank you. I can carry you at least, despite how much you weigh. It's like having two cement bags in my arms." Sephiroth scowled in jest.

"Really? Then I should key you into a little something: muscle weighs more than fat. Meaning, the more muscle you have," he said, all the while pinching Cloud's arm for emphasis "the more you weigh."

"Meaning, you have more muscle than me. I've seen your arms, for you insisted that I look at you naked while we bathed. You must have trained since you were three years old to look as good as you do." Sephiroth felt the mood between them change instantly. Did Cloud…just tell him he looked good naked? Perhaps being romantically involved with him was not as farfetched, or out of reach, as he once suspected.

He decided to not manipulate the situation around. If he wanted to bring out a confession about Cloud's sexuality, he could have done it. However, since he didn't want to play around with Cloud's emotions and thoughts, like he had done in the past, he was left with just changing the subject instead.

"Thank you. And if the intent was to make me feel better, it worked." He knew that Cloud was breathing a sigh of relief right then, for he was not talking about his body, or poking fun of his past comment. All that was happening, was that Sephiroth was talking about himself, and how he felt. Meaning, the conversation switched direction from Cloud to Sephiroth. Love was selfless.

Cloud just chuckled, but Sephiroth could feel the man's heart hammering behind his chest. It was just because he was exerting himself for flight. That was all. He might as well nip that notion in the bud before he got disappointed. However, he was looking forward to whatever this surprise was.

The blonde haired male spotted the place where they were going to make their next shelter. Sephiroth had to admit, Cloud was excellent in finding means of sanctuary, among everything else he was good at. He supposed that's what happened when one had such a hard life.

They landed, and Cloud was careful with placing Sephiroth down, being mindful of his injuries. This made Sephiroth think, that if he was who he once was, then he would have thrown Cloud to the ground, glowering and saying that he would always be nothing more than a broken puppet.

It was then that Sephiroth decided to stop thinking like that. He was changed, and there was no sense in thinking those dark thoughts. Besides, when he was with someone who was an angel to him, there was no room for anything but pure thoughts. Anything less was not accepted in the presence of such a man. Cloud was his inebriation, guardian, and idol now.

Cloud showed him that he had found another cave that was a lot bigger than the other one. Dripping water resounded through the cave, and there were stalagmites everywhere, glowing from within the earth with a pale, pulsating light. It was quite a nice place. Also, Cloud had set up some beds with huge leaves, and large chunks of…grass?

"Grass?" Cloud nodded sheepishly, as if he wished he didn't have to resort to such measures.

"I really wish we had sleeping bags…or blankets or something. But, since we don't, I just carved out pieces of grass, and placed them for your bed. It's better than the cold cave floor for your back." It was then that Sephiroth noticed that Cloud hadn't thought to do the same thing with his own bed place. He more than likely had located the place, swooped down, and got to work making beds for them, and setting up means for a fire. The nights were blessedly warm, so fire was not as much a necessity. However, if there were seasons here, it would mean that soon, the temperature would be dropping, and the fire would be essential to keeping their body temperature up.

"Cloud…thank you. But you forgot to do your own side." Cloud nodded.

"I just wanted to get you here first. The one who is wounded is always the top priority after all." Sephiroth sighed, and felt like he should shake the man back and forth by his shoulders, or thank him fervently.

Instead, he took one of the pointed sticks that was outside of the cave, and began carving into the ground, taking out a large rectangular chunk of grass. Dammit, it was harder than it looked…

"Sephiroth, what are you doing?" Sephiroth looked up, and saw that Cloud was looking down at him as if he were the strangest, most bizarre thing he had ever seen. His mouth was slightly agape, as if he couldn't believe that Sephiroth was actually doing this. Well, it wasn't planned. However, Cloud needed a bed. "Sephiroth stand up." Stubbornly, he didn't. He figured that this at least, he could do.

However, it was not as easy as it looked. If he had a knife or something else, other than a pathetic piece of pointed wood, then he would have been up on his feet already. Nevertheless, it was hard.

"I'm just getting your bed together. It's the least I can do." He huffed this, as he managed to get a small little chunk out of the earth. A little more…

"Sephiroth. You said that you would let me take care of you. So, please…stand up. I don't want you opening your wound again." That's right. His wound…

There was nothing dripping down his hips, so he took that as a good sign. Sighing into submission, Sephiroth cast the wood aside. It was then he realized that he couldn't get up. After sitting in a cave for a day and a half-or longer-it was remarkably easy to find yourself too stiff to move.

Sephiroth cast all of his pride aside, beat it senseless, and came back to reality. He was going to have to ask for help. "Cloud…I can't get up." There was no sigh, just two hands helping him gently to his feet. He rocked on his heels for a moment, shook his head, and breathed a sigh of relief. There was no way he could have done that on his own. Hell…he would be dead by now had Cloud not helped him in the way that he was doing.

"Are you alright, Mr. Incorrigible?" Mr. Incorrigible? Sephiroth looked to a chuckling Cloud, and had to laugh beside himself. Now they were on friendly terms…nickname terms.

"Yes, Miss. Cloud." Cloud's mouth dropped open, and he shut it quickly, as if he were a hungry Venus fly trap who wanted to eat any insect that happened by.

"H-how…" Sephiroth snorted.

"I am the Great Sephiroth. I know all about endeavors into castles where our favorite hero dresses up in a pink dress, and looks for all the world like a beautiful damsel." Oh, shit. He didn't. He didn't just call Cloud beautiful. It was the truth, yes…but damn! He didn't just do that!

The coloring on Cloud's cheeks was evidence enough of that previous statement. Oh yes, he had.

"It was for a mission! Besides…it was a one time thing. I'm obviously a man!" Defensiveness…he was embarrassed. Sephiroth chuckled, and realized he was hiding behind his laughter. It was a defense mechanism, meant to veil his true intentions. For example, had he torn the veil off, he would be saying how much his eyes reminded him of rare lapis stones, found only in the caverns of some mountain somewhere, hidden for all the world except for some prized explorer to find.

"Yes, you are. However, you could have fooled me with those hips." Before Cloud could react, Sephiroth tapped both of Cloud's hips one time, and from body language alone…Cloud enjoyed it. At least, that was his body's reaction based on instinct. If someone, anyone really, were to comb their fingers through his hair, he would moan in ecstasy, for it felt good. It mattered not if it was his worst enemy or his best friend. The point, was that Cloud was not easing into the touch because he wanted it, it was just the body's reaction.

Cloud tensed up, but a look of jest was in his eyes. "With your eyelashes, you could be a female. Add breasts, and a lighter voice, and you could be the lead star on LOVELESS." Ah, that play again. Of course Cloud would know it, for Genesis was probably telling him it at that moment. Or, he just knew it from Gaia.

Sephiroth scoffed. But before he could say anything, Cloud eased him against the cave entrance, placing his back on the cool gray stone. What was he doing?

"If we stop now, we can avoid a tussle. I don't want you to open up your injury. Stay there, and close your eyes. I have to give you your surprise now." Sephiroth opened his mouth to protest, but Cloud placed his hands over his eyes then. This surprised Sephiroth a great deal. Also, it alerted him to the fact that he and Cloud were doing a lot of touching as of late. This, he enjoyed greedily, reveling in the touch as if he were a leech getting fat and plump with blood. However, he was no leech. He just enjoyed this man's touch…because he was falling in love with him.

Damn. Every time he said that, regardless if it was in his mind or not, he just figured that Cloud would not return the feeling. All he really had to do was come out with it and ask him if he felt the same way. Sadly, if he did that, it would scare Cloud away, and he needed his company far too much to risk that.

"Please. You'll really enjoy this. Just keep your eyes closed until I say so." Sephiroth agreed, rather breathlessly. Something about having the man's hands on his face made him break out in a cold sweat. Meaning, even if he wanted to say no, then he would not have had a choice in the matter.

Sephiroth waited with his eyes closed, considering his options. He really, really was trying his luck with this man. It was only a miracle from the Goddess herself that Cloud was not noticing the way that he was…flirting with him. Yes, that was the word. He was flirting with the younger man as if he were some sort of high strung lion that wanted to mate with another lion, dodging and gravitating in a sensual dance before foreplay began.

That could only mean, that it was only a matter of time before Cloud uncovered his true intentions. The reckless side of him said to tell him right then, to be bold and courageous about it. Only a coward hid his feelings. Besides…Zack, Genesis and Angeal wanted him to be happy he knew. And if this was the way he found happiness-which it was-at Cloud's side…then he would do it. However, the rational and cautious part of his mind said to not do anything hasty yet. He would wait it out, until the moment seemed right. It had to feel right he knew. One couldn't throw themselves in the middle of the tumult of this passion and expect to emerge unscathed. It had to be at a calm moment, in the heart of the storm itself.

"I'm back Sephiroth." Good gods, Cloud's voice was enough to make him run his hands down his own chest and moan, lost in some sort of vocal foreplay. It was…beyond words. "Open your mouth." The thought almost made Sephiroth open his eyes. Just what the Hell was Strife thinking he could put into his mouth without his knowledge?

Still, Sephiroth opened his mouth an inch or two. Whatever it was…it was obviously food. Something slipped between his lips, and he bit down on it, feeling that it was sweet. Juice ran down his chin, and he licked his lips, all the while chewing…something amazing. He didn't know what it was, but it was sweet, and utterly delicious. Cloud waited until he swallowed, and placed the whole thing into his mouth. Sephiroth kept his eyes closed and chewed, reveling in the flavor. It was sweet, and he wanted more of this…this delicacy!

"What…what was that?" Cloud chuckled, and before he could say a word, began tracing his lips with the sweet delicacy. Sephiroth practically came right then, for it was the most sensual thing he had ever felt. Cloud was touching the outlines of his lips with…whatever it was! That was what made it so exciting he thought, not seeing what it was. When one sense was gone, the others took over.

"It's called a strawberry. I found a bush around here, along with other fruits too. Raspberries for instance, and blackberries to name a few. I couldn't believe my eyes. I thought I was going crazy. I mean, come on? Berry bushes in oblivion?" Sephiroth would have laughed, but he would have only moaned, which would alert Cloud to how he was literally, doing foreplay on his lips. However, it was only to open Sephiroth's mouth to the fruit. He opened his eyes, and Cloud let him eat the other berry. Cloud showed him that it was a red bell shaped fruit, with little wedges all around. It was beautiful, and he recalled something about strawberries…ah, yes. It was romantic to eat them with chocolate. He had no chocolate.

'Improvise my friend…improvise.' Dammit! So Genesis had been watching and listening this entire time…which meant, that more than likely, he knew more than he was letting on with this day, and with his own feelings for Cloud. Oh yes. The red head knew all it seemed.

Cloud helped him into the cave, and set him down on his bed of grass and leaves. Sephiroth saw that there was a large pile of these strawberries right beside him, and he knew that Cloud had done this intentionally, so that he didn't have to over reach for something. The man was being incredibly kind to him.

"Thank you, Cloud. That was delicious." A pause. "Why did you think to give me fruits?" Cloud sat down on his own bed, of which he had managed to place a bit of grass on to make it comfier. Sapphire eyes met jade.

"I remember you saying you hadn't tasted until you were here. It got me thinking that you needed way more than meat in your diet. We both do. Luckily, Goddess willing…I found those berries, and I thought about how nice it would be for you to taste something sweet, for the first time in your life." Something stuck in Sephiroth's throat. Cloud had thought of him.

"Thank you. Truly, they are delicious." He popped a strawberry in his mouth for emphasis, and chewed with a small smile on his face. Cloud smiled, and yawned suddenly, though he tried to disguise it. That's right. Once again, Cloud had reached his limit, and was thoroughly spent.

"Please, Cloud. Go to sleep. Thank you again for everything…I really am not sure I am so deserving of this kindness." Cloud rolled to face his left side, and his eyes glimmered like pools of sapphire moonstone. It made a delicious shiver run through his lower back and forearms.

"Yes, you are. You deserve to eat strawberries and taste sweet things. You deserve to be taken care of, Sephiroth." Cloud closed his eyes, and was silent for so long, that Sephiroth thought the man fell asleep. But after another moment, he spoke again. "Let me know if you need anything…alright?" Sephiroth nodded, but since the man was blind to the gesture, he said the words out loud.

"I will. Get some rest, Miss Cloud." After a chuckle, light breathing was heard.

Cloud fell asleep facing him, and it was one of the most beautiful things he had seen. He had never known for a man to fall asleep looking so…enchanting. But this man, the one who he had made the mistake of making his enemy and puppet, looked lovely while he slept. His eyes stirred gently in his sleep, and every so often, his lips would rub together, as if he were in the process of almost speaking, but thought better of it. Sephiroth just hoped he was not plagued by nightmares, like he had been the last time he had slept. It made Sephiroth wonder about the kinds of things that scared Cloud, and he wanted to know about them. If he had peered into his mind, and saw the torture that the Goddess had put him through mentally, then he doubted there was anything he could have ever seen in Cloud's mind that was disturbing in the least.

"Maybe one day, you'll tell me." Sephiroth bit into a strawberry, and delighted in the taste again. Cloud had shown him this, things that he had seen and tried before, but had never truly been able to enjoy before he came along. Things could be gained in oblivion, feelings that had never been, now itching to be set free from their wombs. Feelings could be gained in abyss, sensations that were dying for the surface. The heart of the storm was imminent, he could feel, and it was a place that would either send him spiraling through the tempest winds, or land him safely in the eye of the hurricane. Time would tell.

"Thanks for today, Cloud Strife." Cloud snoozed and Sephiroth felt a small smile play on his lips. He was no longer the General who chastised his squad until they felt like they were less than themselves. He was no longer the man who would shun his friends and people who tried to care, all because he thought that no one would understand him. He was a man who was forgiven by people who he never expected to see again, much less be given forgiveness from. He was a man who realized that he was in love with someone who he didn't want to ruin by loving, but would try anyways.

Meaning, in this unknown hour, he would share some words. It was a poem he had read once, scoffed at, and shut the book cover on once. It was Rumi's, "I Am a Sculptor of Mold and Form" and it emphasized nicely what he felt for Cloud. He didn't feel ridiculous for telling Cloud this as he slept. He merely felt vindicated, once more.

"I am a sculptor, a molder of form. In every moment I shape an idol. But then, in front of you, I melt them down. I can rouse a hundred forms and fill them with spirit, but when I look at your face, I want to throw them in the fire."

Sephiroth took a deep breath when Cloud shifted in his sleep, his eyelids stirring beneath the lids. Then again, he was only being a coward if he did this. Who the Hell recited poetry to the person of their affections when they were sleeping? Someone who was afraid of being caught telling them this in the daylight hours, that's who. However…he would continue, for a red haired poet was screaming in his ears to continue.

'Alright, Genesis. Tell this to Angeal sometime.' He heard a chuckle, and he pictured Genesis scratching this onto parchment, to recite to his lover. What friends he had. The thought gave him strength to continue. This was the man who had taken care of him when no one else was around, and when he owed him next to nothing. He deserved kind words.

"My soul spills into yours and is blended. Because my soul has absorbed your fragrance, I cherish it. Every drop of blood I spill informs the earth, I merge with my Beloved when I participate in love." The silver haired man clenched his fingers into his palms then. Would he regret saying these words? No, he wouldn't. He would regret not saying them.

"In this house of mud and water, my heart has fallen to ruins. Enter this house, my Love, or let me leave." The poem was basically expressing that the person the speaker was enchanted with made them change almost everything about themselves, their hobbies and where their talents lay. Also, they were soul mates, and the speaker was saying that his love should allow him into their heart, lest he fall into despair. It was a beautiful poem, and it reminded him of his present situation. How hard was it to say three little words?

"I love you, Cloud Strife." There. Not so hard. Right. It was easy only because Cloud was asleep. Soon, when their adventure and journey reached the heart of the storm, he would say these words in the waking hours. That would determine almost everything about him.


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Woot! Go Sephiroth! Anyways, my friend had this idea that Aeris knew that she was going to die in the Forgotten City, and I keyed into that idea for the sake of this story. ^^ I thought it made a lot of sense. Also, thank you for reading this story, it makes my day...almost as much as reviews!