Finally

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don’t own Final Fantasy VIII, Squaresoft, Squall Quistis or any of the other characters from the FFVIII world. I don’t know what Dr Kadowaki’s name is. However, Becca uses the name Alison and I thought it suited her so I borrowed it…Thank you, Sis.

Quistis took a deep breath then pasted on a fake smile and walked up to the table to join the rest of the group for lunch. Well, at the minute, “everyone” seemed to consist of Squall or Rinoa. Excellent! She sat down beside Rinoa. “Hi Rinny, how’s it going? Hey Squall!”

Rinoa looked up and gave her a weak smile. Squall for his part just looked at her and grunted. Oh great! Another fight! What’s with them? They used to be all sweet and loving. She sighed deeply. Oh well, they’ll make it up later and be all over each other again soon, no doubt!

She ate as much of her lunch as she could face then practically ran from the table. Hyne! It was hard to be around them when they were like that. Not even because of the strained atmosphere. She’d had more than enough of that back with her adoptive parents. No the thing that she found so hard to deal with was the fact that, every time they rowed, it gave her stupid, pointless hope.

She couldn’t help thinking that MAYBE if they were to split up, he would be with her. Stupid! And she knew it, which is why she hated seeing them row. Let’s face it, if Squall really wanted to be with me, if there was really any hope of us being together, he wouldn’t be with Rinoa. Would he? She shook her head and cleared them of the pointlessly depressing thoughts. Enough, Quistis. Get a grip!

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Quistis quickly moved out of the way when she seen an even more hyper than usual Selphie barrelling towards her. A second later, guilt flashed across her mind as Selphie ran full tilt in the wall behind her. Ouch! She offered her hand to the yellow ball of sunshine and helped her up. “OMG, Quisty. You’ll never BELIEVE what happened!”

She was too tired for this game, “what, Selphie?” She was taken aback when Selphie blurted out her answer; usually she made Quistis guess what had happened. Which usually entailed responses being given such as, “Ummm…did a chocobo break into the cafeteria, eat all the donuts then try to make out with Cid?” It was a REALLY old game of Selphie’s that had gone on since they were in the Orphanage. She smiled slightly at the image in her head and didn’t really register what Selphie had said. It was only when she heard Squall’s name that she focussed on what Selphie was saying. …split up! Can you believe it? It’s so sad!” Quistis blinked, “Say that again Selphie, please?”

Selphie huffed impatiently, “Squall and Rinoa have split up. Apparently Rinoa didn’t feel that Squall loved her enough so she’s left him. She said that she wouldn’t be back!” Quistis struggled to breathe. Was it just her, or was there not very much air in the hallway? She looked at Selphie who was continuing to talk but realised that she couldn’t hear what she was saying. Her words were being drowned out by a loud roaring in her ears. The last thing she heard was a worried Selphie calling her name…

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She came to in the Infirmary with Doctor Kadowaki checking her vital signs and a worried Selphie beside her. Maybe if I close my eyes, they’ll leave me alone…? “Hello Quistis!” Or not…! “Hi Dr Kadowaki.” She was rewarded with a frown, “Quistis, how many times must I tell you, call me Alison.” She nodded and sat up slowly in the bed while the Doctor watched her with a worried expression on her face.

She decided to beat Alison to it, “I’m fine! I just didn’t eat much at lunch.” Dr Kadowaki sighed, “I’ve told you about this before, Quistis. You need to eat more. She nodded, “I know. I’m sorry for worrying you and Selphie. I just…I was in a hurry.” She looked up at Alison and realised that she was in for a lecture. “Quistis, look. This is serious. If this happens again, I’m going to have to remove you from active duty – that includes teaching - at least for a couple of weeks.

She sighed. “Fine Alison, I will eat better. I promise. Can I go now?” The doctor nodded slowly and she got up. Selphie of course, was with her every step of the way until she got back to her dorm. Quistis sighed deeply as she stood by her door and took her books back from her. “Selphie, I’m just going to lie down for a while, okay? I’m sorry.”

Selphie frowned. “It’s okay, Quistis. Just get some sleep. I’ll talk to you later.” With that she rushed off and Quistis walked into her room. She flopped down on her bed. You need to get a grip, Quis. Just because Rinoa and him are finished, doesn’t mean that you stand a chance with him!

She was asleep in moments!

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Squall was in his dorm. If anyone had seen him, they would have been gawking because he was definitely not acting like his usual stoic self - on the contrary, he was throwing what Selphie would call a 'hissy fit' It was definitely an interesting and hair-raising sight!

"I don't love her enough? I loved her! I bloody well loved her...who the hell is she to tell me that I don't love her enough!" He kicked the chair and watched as it fell over. It calmed him down a little so he kicked it again, "The hell with her! I don't need her! I don't need anybody. I'm better off alone!"

He crumpled to the floor, "Yeah right, Squall. No point kidding myself, is there?"

He sat there then suddenly dropped his head in his hands, "Rinoa, why wasn't I good enough for you?" Squall realised that he was crying and part of his mind actually considered the fact of just how much he had changed since she came into his life...he was CRYING!!! he couldn't remember the last time he'd done that!

He was so taken aback by that fact that he actually stood up to look at himself in the mirror..his face was red and blotchy and his eyes looked more blue than usual..."What a lovely sight!" He punched the mirror without thought and watched as it shattered and the shards fell into the sink.

He lifted one of the longer shards up and considered it, "What if I just used this to end it, RIGHT NOW?" He blinked, "What? No way!" He was hurt but he wasn't THAT hurt...was he? "I need a drink!"

He cleared up the broken glass and headed out of his dorm - headed for the nearest bar to get blind drunk...

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Over the next few weeks, Squall seemed to do his best to undo all the hard work that he had been through to

Seifer seemed to be the one who was on the receiving end of his anger most of the time. Of course, being Squall, he didn't shout at Seifer, he 'trained' with him.

Normally, Seifer was the first to suggest a spar with Squall but Quistis had run into him on a couple of occasions and discovered that he was trying to hide from Squall. Seifer apparently knew that he needed to train but Squall's anger left him drained. He told her that "I feel like I'm fighting for my life - I know that it's not necessarily a bad thing but...I still have to go out afterwards on missions and I'm TIRED, Quistis. To tell you the truth, I'm worried about him."

Which was why Quistis was now standing outside his door about to knock and try to intervene. She didn't know if he would actually listen to her but she had to try...

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A/N: So this is where it starts....? I didn't realise how big this story could be when I started it but....yeah! This is the first story I've written more for the sexual content. ( -looks at daydream- That doesn't count - that was an experiment) The plot line itself isn't going to be terribly unique I guess, but hey. I'm enjoying writing it anyway. so please let me know what you think