Taking Care of Business

Chapter 3

The dark and silence of Midgar's polluted slums was slowly shattered a moment later. First by the sound of a weapons cabinet smashing, then a faint tapping as a grenade bounced across a certain pawn shop's concrete floor. There was the sound of two pretty surprised shrieks as they realised what the hell it was bouncing towards them, the sound of heavy footfall as the other one had enough brains to actually run away, then one huge mother of a bang errupted, taking with it one pretty crappily made materia display case, about twenty pieces of crappy materia, and two complete assholes that thought the duck and cover tecnique would ward off a full blown explosion.

If there was anyone actually left sleeping in the damn slums after that, they had to be either dead, drugged, or deaf as a goddamn post. Anyone who was crazy enough to look outta their windows to see what the hell had happened would've just seen three singed Turks emerging from a smoking building, peering around to make sure there weren't more assholes out here and then stalking over to an expensive looking car, dusting themselves off.

"Rude..." Tseng said calmly as he opened the car door, climbing in to the driver's seat, "just out of interest, what was it you said to that pawn shop owner?"

Rude chuckled lowly and adjusted his sunglasses, looking back at the smoking building.

"I said if he stayed there I was gonna break his other shoulder."

Tseng 'hmmed' what I guessed was a laugh as I slid into the passenger seat beside him. Rude climbed in the back, flicking a piece of charred masonry off his shoulder, as his face returned to that straight faced bored look. Tseng didn't exactly seem the happiest guy on the planet either, hands clamped to the wheel and that way too thoughtful look on his face. Almost made me with my stupid grin feel out of place around here. Well excuse me for being happy I didn't end up with my brains decorating the wall...

I sighed and slid down contentedly in Tseng's leather seat, hands behind my head and a contented smirk on my face. "Hey don't everybody thank me at once then, after all I did just save -"

"Reno shut up." Tseng snapped, eyes fixed on the road just in front of the car. Rude behind me grunted and placed a hand on my shoulder in warning.

"Yeah Reno, shut up."

I blinked in confusion. Was I... missing something here? What the hell did I do?

I was about to ask that out loud, when Tseng turned in his seat to glare at me. And not just one of his 'I'm gonna put you on a charge' glares either. This was Tseng's hardcore psychosis glare - the one that I hardly ever saw, and when I did I ran pretty far pretty fast. With Rude grabbing to my shoulder though, that wasn't really an option.

"The word 'idiot' is a thousand times too lenient a word to describe how utterly stupid you are." He growled dangerously, leaning in towards me. I opened my mouth to say something, but Tseng didn't give me the damn chance. "You nearly got all three of us killed tonight because you refused to listen to my orders. If you weren't one of my Turks, I'd shoot you through the head just to see if it even changed how much you used your brain."

"Hey! Dammit I just..." I trailed off patheticly.

Ok so I'm a Turk, there's a lot I'm not afraid of, but damn Tseng can freak me out when he wants to. I don't even think he was joking about that last part either... I tried to keep myself under control though... I had the overwhelming urge to curl up and try to disappear somewhere from that glare, but instead I just gulped and frowned at him, scratching the back of my neck awkwardly. Heh... amazing aint it? I'll talk back to a psycho with a gun pointing at my head, but when it comes to Tseng, my brain freezes up and doesn't let me even say anything. Fucking thing...

He slowly sat back in his seat and started up the car, turning back to the alleyway ahead. "Next time you do anything so moronic, if we survive, I'm going to demote you, and give your job to one of Hojo's experiments." He sighed. "At least then my second in command wouldn't be a complete imbecile."

Rude behind me slowly let go of my shoulder and sat back in his seat, leaving me with a sore shoulderblade, and one mother of a sore ego. I sank into my seat and folded my arms. I guess I had been pretty dumb, but dammit how the hell was I meant to know this was gonna turn into a shootout?! I snorted, sat back and looked out the side windows as we passed the slums, heading for the road back up to the plate. I'd known Tseng for two and a half years now, and even when we didn't... yaknow... have this little arrangement, I'd never seen him so pissed at me. He'd been icy before, yeah, but actually pissed off to this degree? I felt my stomach lurch. Guess this meant plans with me and Tseng were off for tonight, huh? My heart sank into the floor and I sighed. Being the out-of-hours kissass I am, I hate it when Tseng blocks me out. Fuck, I'd just go back to my place and get outta my face drunk. Yeah, that might make me feel a little better. On the other hand it might make me feel even more crappy than I already did, but I was willing to take the gamble.

***

Rude's apartment aint too far from mine - on the wrong side of Midgar, in the bad part of town. A ten minute walk (or stagger, depending on wether I'd started drinking already) through Midgar from my scummy little apartment landed me at Rude's door, which meant I could bug the asshole when I didn't have anything better to do, with the added bonus that his place was right across the road from the nearest bar, which is where I spent most of my time passed out and sprawled over a table in the corner when I wasn't at work, or when Tseng and me couldn't get together for a little fun. Not tonight though. I was in the mood for some heavy lone drinking on my sofa, to be followed by a few hallucinations, passing out on the kitchen floor, followed by morning where I'd nurse my hangover, drive to work and get a still pissed off Tseng snapping at me icily for being late to work.

Yup, I had my night well and truly planned out.

Rude grunted at me and nodded as we pulled up outside his place. All three of us had been silent since Tseng had ripped my head off down in the slums. Not that that was unusual for those two sons of bitches, but normally I shoot my mouth off just to keep myself entertained. Not now though. I was pretty sure if I opened my mouth right now Tseng would smash my damn head through the windshield. I just nodded back at Rude as he got out of the car. He seemed to have forgiven me, but not Mr Cold-sonofabitch next to me. I just scratched my head and tried to avoid eye contact as Tseng turned to me again. Dammit boss, leave me alone would ya? I was just hoping he'd drop me off at my place without saying anything else.

Fat chance.

He sat there silently for a second and watched me. I tried to look as though there was something really interesting about watching Rude disappear into his apartment.

"What you did..." He growled finally, and then trailed off.

"...Boss?"

Silence. Finally I gathered enough courage to look over. Tseng was sitting there, eyes closed and pinching the bridge of his nose stressfuly.

"You nearly got yourself killed, Reno."

...now you gotta understand me - I'm not too great at tact. It's one of my oh-so-many failings, and I got a tendency to put my foot, my ankle, and my whole damn leg in my mouth on a daily basis. That's why more often than not, Tseng makes my life a damn misery at work, and why out of hours, I sometimes dont have a clue what to say. Now was one of those times - those out of hours occasions when I didn't know what the hell to say to him. So instead of saying something that might've actually gotten me out of the crap I was in, idiot-boy Reno here went for the humor approach.

"Heh... look on the bright side, Tseng. If I'd ended up dead, 'least you wouldn't have to tidy up after my ass anymore." I shrugged, smirking sheepishly and hoping to hell Tseng would shut up about how badly I screwed up tonight. Tseng just glanced up at me grimly, the mako-green-tinted skyline of Midgar glinting back at me in those obsidian eyes. Suddenly something there hit me.

Dammit, Tseng wasn't pissed off at me for getting him and Rude in danger. He was pissed off at me for getting me in danger.

...I guess, this was Tseng's weird, abstract, none-too-logical way of saying he was worried about me. Well... if this was Tseng's usual way of showing his emotions, then no damn wonder the guy confused me to hell and back so often.

Tseng beside me sighed slowly and turned back to the wheel, as I gulped back down a 'sorry' that I'd been trying to force out of my damn throat as it sank in. Now it was my turn to sigh, staring out the side window again.

"Reno...?"

"Mmm?" I looked over as Tseng started up the car, staring ahead at the road neutrally. His eyes narrowed slightly.

"Your wages are docked... thirty percent."

I blinked and opened my mouth stupidly. That wasn't fair! Ten percent, ok I could deal with, but... thirty?! Dammit that was my drink money down the drain for the month...

"Dammit Tseng, Rude didn't even get that much when he put laxatives in Scarlet's coffee!" I protested moodily. Even if it had been damn funny at the time, this was much more serious. Tseng just blinked slowly, unphazed and catlike as ever.

"That's because I know who dared Rude to do it." He said smoothly. I tried to look out the window innocently and pretend I didn't know what he meant. "If I were you, Reno, I'd be quiet. I could easily decide that thirty percent isn't quite enough... or I could just suspend you again."

Enough said. Even if I wanted to argue, I was too tired and I knew I wasn't about to win. In the end I just let out a melancholy sigh and stuck my chin in my hands sulking like a schoolkid. Something which I've become used to doing since I became a Turk because lets face it - whenever Tseng's brain and mine collide? It's pretty obvious the winner isn't gonna be the redhead's over here.

The car ride back to my place was silent. I've had a lot of silent car-rides with Tseng before, but not for a while, and the last one had been about four months ago - one of the worst goddamn silences I ever had to deal with. Which is why, now that we were back to the silent treatment, I wasn't exactly enjoying myself.

In fact, it made me feel kind of sick. Not because Tseng wasn't talking to me, not because the son of a bitch still wouldn't let me smoke in his flashy car, but just out of rememberance of what had happened that day, four months ago. The worst day of my life, actually, but I'll explain about that later. Right now all you needed to know was that me and Tseng hadn't said a word after we left Rude's place. And it made me feel Sick.

I had my hands still holding my chin up, as though if I let go my head was gonna just fall on the floor without the support. OK, I'll admit - I was/am/will always be an idiot, but did he have to drive that home by taking my damn wages? Turks aint exactly the most high paid Shinra employees anyway. In fact, despite the classy suits we're probably the worst paid sons of bitches in the Tower, so why do that?

Because he wanted to punish me properly, thats why. He knew a suspension would just give me an excuse to lounge around for a few weeks. Taking my beer money? That wasn't punishment.

That was torture

I'd found one speck of dirt on the dashboard, which was keeping me entertained and out of eye contact with Tseng as we drove along, passing street lights, shops, bars, hotels... It was only when I looked up after about fifteen minutes, wondering if Tseng was taking some extra extra long shortcut, that I realised something.

I blinked dumbly for a second, staring at the streets in confusion, then I redirected my gormless look at the Wutaian in the seat next to me, whose face seemed to have jammed itself into neutral.

"Uh... Tseng?" I said slothishly, too confused to make my words come out any more concisely. He 'mmmed' at me in traditional Tseng fashion.

"...this isn't the way to my apartment."

It might have been the Mako reflection from the reactors just playing tricks on me, or even the lights from the flashy hotels we were passing, but I could've sworn that just for the tiniest fraction of a second, the sliver of a smirk glanced across Tseng's face. Then he went back to that annoying neutral and raised an eyebrow.

"Reno... if you think I'm going to let you go home so you can sulk and drink yourself unconscious, then you're more of an idiot than I thought you were." He sighed exhasperatedly, turning a corner towards the gateway for sector 1, and leaving me completely bewildered by how the hell he'd read my mind. "You can sulk just as comfortably in my apartment, I'm sure. And besides..." he licked his lips at this point, making my Dirty Mind promptly jump into action, as I've no damn doubt he meant it to, "It's only midnight. I don't think even you have the ability to sulk right through until morning... do you?"

Gah, devious bastard. He had to know there was no way I could say 'yes' after that. Dammit just the thought of him licking his lips was enough for my sex drive to be well and truly up and running, and he knew it - I could see the faintest glow of humor in his eyes as he simply carried on driving. All I could do was shrug and sigh, surrendering to the might that was Tseng's sex appeal. I'll admit - I'm a pushover when it comes to him - so sue me.

"I dunno... I guess you could persuade me." I licked my own lips. "...depends what you got to bribe me with."

OK, and Tseng was downright smirking now and not even making the tiniest effort to hide it. I couldn't help but just smirk with him as we stopped outside Tseng's classy apartment block, Tseng turning the car off as a simple 'oh?' escaped those rarely-upturned lips of his, before he leaned over and looked me straight in the eyes, an eyebrow cocked coyly.

"Well... I don't know about a bribe, but... if you decide you want to stop sulking..." He reached up and placed a hand on my jawline, tracing it slowly. "I'm sure I could think of a few things to keep you happy." He murmured, trailing his fingers slowly down my neck. I closed my eyes and growled softly. A second later, Tseng's lips locked with mine - just for a second, just for a teasing moment before he backed off with a wicked smirk and got out of the car.

"If you decide to stop sulking, that is."

A second later, after a halfhearted groan at the loss of contact, and a slow, savouring lick of my lips, I got out and followed Tseng into the apartment block, smirking smuttily all the way. If there was one thing Tseng knew how to do besides kill people, it was how to get a guy worked up.