Viral Love

It became very clear to me that Hojo wasn’t going to do well here. I didn’t know if he’d have an episode or not. He stayed fairly close to me as we made our way through the events, balking only at the tube method of travel. I never liked zipping back and forth through these metal tunnels either, and I reasoned our shared claustrophobia had something to do with a shared aversion.

“We’ll see Dio first and get it out of the way,” I told him, guiding him by hand through the enormous crowd. If I didn’t hang onto him, I soon lost him. I’d discovered that the hard way by losing him right outside Event Square.

“What do we gain by seeing Dio?” Hojo asked.

“I’m going to inform him we’re entering the chocobo races. We need a good bird and a decent jockey.” I pulled him clear of a knot of people, tugged him closer to me. “Stay with me, Hojo. If I lose you here it’ll be the devil to find you.”

I managed to get him to Dio’s informal office, where two men flanked the door. “I want to see Dio,” I told them. “Is he here?”

“You have an appointment?” One of the muscle-bound men asked.

“No.”

“Wait here and I’ll see if he’s in,” the other said. He paused to look at Hojo. “You a new jockey? You’re a little tall.”

Hojo stared at him like he’d stare at a lab specimen. He didn’t deign to answer. I met the gaze of the second man. “My friend could be a jockey?” I asked.

“Huh? Sure,” he answered. “Just a little tall for it. Still, he’s got the right build and weight, just to look at him.”

I looked down at Hojo. He gave me a lopsided grin. “I suppose I could try,” he offered. “You might have to seatbelt me in.”

It seemed facing his fear was good for him in the short term at least. Since he’d made himself get up and sit right in the trolley, he’d acted strange, I knew that well enough. “No, I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I told him. “You have no instinct for riding.”

Hojo rolled his eyes. “Human beings don’t have instincts. It’s what separates us from other animals.”

“Might not have a choice if you want in the races,” the remaining bodyguard grunted. “We’ve got a shortage of jockeys. Making Ester crazy, it is, though it don’t take much.”

“I take it the prison has few hopefuls?” I asked. I’d never liked the fact that Dio just arbitrarily dumped people in Corel Prison without benefit of a trial. To get out, one had to win a chocobo race here in the Gold Saucer. The man’s idea of justice sorely lacked.

“Yeah. It’s really bad down there right now. Got lots o convicts without no talent but killin.” The man eyed me closely. “Haven’t I seen you before?”

“I’m a member of AVALANCHE and the WRO,” I said. “Have you seen any Shin-Ra people here?”

“Him,” the man pointed at Hojo. “But, he ain’t never been here before.”

“Indeed I have not,” Hojo said tightly.

“Whatchoo doin’ with him, anyway?” the guard continued. “Ain’t he dangerous to you?”

“Not especially,” I said calmly. “He knows I’ll shoot him dead if he tries to get away.”

The man grinned, showing quite a few gold teeth. “You can’t take that big rifle in there, you know. If you want I can hold it on your so-called friend while you talk to Dio. That IS if he’s in.”

I looked down at Hojo.

“I’ll be good,” he said. “Borrow handcuffs from this fine gentleman with gold teeth. That should solve the issue.”

“You makin’ fun o me?” The man made a fist.

“I wouldn’t dream of laughing at you,” Hojo answered, smiling. “Some things are just too tragic to find funny.”

Oh god. Here he goes again, I thought with a quiet sense of desperation. “He’s a diabetic and he needs some sugar,” I quickly explained. “The longer he goes without it, the meaner he gets.”

The guard gave Hojo a long, measuring look. Slowly, he pulled a chocolate bar from his pocket. He offered it like Hojo’s accidental touch would poison him. “Here, then,” he said. “Eat it before I let you in to see the boss. Can’t have a crazy man going off in front of Dio.”

Hojo rudely snatched bar, but he did throw the man a hasty ‘thank you’ in return for the chocolate. I watched him, amused despite myself. He tore into that candy like an addict.

“Dio will see you,” the returning guard informed.

I handed my rifle over, grabbed Hojo and shoved him into the room ahead of me.

“Valentine, wasn’t it?” Dio asked by way of greeting, rising from his desk to shake my hand.

So good of him to shake my hand, considering how he’d dumped me into Corel Prison without batting an eyelash.

“Yes. I came to ask if we could buy a dune buggy. We have to travel over the desert.”

Dio flexed his enormous muscles. Hojo watched, seemingly fascinated by the display, his black eyes big enough to swallow an ocean liner. Dio caught him looking. I saw him briefly puff up to further impress my companion.

Well.

Big surprise there.

“I could sell you one for half a million gil, or you can win a decent chocobo and get the same result,” Dio answered me, eyes still upon Hojo and gauging his reactions to every little flex and bulge. “Or, you can win half a million gil at the races and buy the dune buggy from me.” He made a show of getting his hair off his neck, making his arms ripple. “But, I’m open to other…negotiations.”

In other words, I can extort money and time from you, or you can set me up with your friend. Well, Hojo didn’t look like he’d find the task bothersome. I made Dio meet my eyes. “Give us a dune buggy and Kanaye here will spend some time with you.”

Hojo turned his head slowly to stare at me. His mouth moved, but nothing came out, mercifully.

“Done,” Dio said. He got up and grabbed Hojo’s shoulder. “You come back for him in the morning. Where are you staying?”

“The Haunted Hotel,” I replied. Hojo shuddered visibly.

I left, shutting the door firmly behind me. “Don’t you leave me here, Valentine!” Hojo shouted through the heavy wood. I heard a thumping sound.

“Enjoy socializing,” I said, though I wasn’t sure he could hear me with all that thumping and banging going on. I took my rifle back and made my way toward the hotel. Maybe Hojo would be in a better mood if he got laid. He’d said it probably wouldn’t help if I fucked him. Maybe he just needed someone like Dio.