Junkie-love

Title: Junkie-love

Author: Yorda

Rating: NC-17

Diclaimer: Sadly none of the characters of FF8 are mine, but belong to Squaresoft

Couples: Seifer/Squall

Warnings: angst, lemon, language, mild violence, drug use, OOC

Summary: Seifer's on drugs and Squall's the only one willing to help.

Chapter 4:

Squall stepped out from the shower and grabbed a towel twining it around his narrow waist. For once, Seifer was asleep, so Squall decided to embrace the opportunity to take a shower and grab something to eat. It had now been a week from the day Seifer had arrived to Garden. The past week had been exhausting, but things were finally starting to get better. The first two days of the weaning process Seifer had suffered from powerful withdrawal symptoms, but was now starting to recover. The blonde was still very weak and slept a lot. He managed to eat and drink, but usually they didn't stay in for long.

Squall eyed himself from the mirror. Dark rings surrounded his bloodshot eyes. He hadn't slept for days. He had stayed with Seifer the whole time, not moving from the bed side even to take a shower. Squall had all the food delivered straight to their room, and had informed everyone that he and Seifer were both sick. This way they didn't need to attend any classes. The brunette combed his still dripping hair and stepped out from the now steamy bathroom. He fixed his eyes on Seifer's sleeping form. The blonde still got some kind of involuntary twitches, even during his sleep.

The past days had been both physically and emotionally exhausting, but because of them, Squall now felt closer to Seifer than ever before. He had been forced to forget about their past and actually form a friendship of some sort. It hadn't been easy. Squall still remembered how Seifer used to be: arrogant, cocky and frankly a childish bully. Just six months ago Squall had been sure the blonde had dedicated his life to making Squall's miserable. But now that they were 'friends', the younger boy just hoped Seifer wouldn't go back to being his old self when he'd get better.

Squall watched as Seifer shifted on the bed, sighing in his sleep. He seated himself in big big arm chair, not caring if he got it wet. Seifer was sweating again, his blonde eyebrows knitted together. Squall took a cloth from the nightstand and pressed it against Seifer's forehead. The blonde immediately woke up, blinking his wearied eyes. Squall had something resembling a smile on his lips as he continued to dry Seifer's damp face with the cloth. The blonde's bloodshot eyes travelled the length of Squall's body. He quickly turned his eyes away as he noticed the younger boy was wearing nothing but a towel around his hips. Squall raised one brow when he saw Seifer's face turn slightly red.

"I just took a shower. Maybe you could take one too? That is, if you're not feeling too tired Seifer." the brunette said, leaning back in the chair. Seifer sat up, stroking his messy golden hair with bony fingers. He was definitely in need of a shower. He raised his face and gave Squall an approving nod.

The brunette stood up from the chair and walked to his wardrobe. He pulled out a pair of dark jeans and a plain black tee-shirt. Squall turned around and let his eyes travel from the clothes in his hands to Seifer. He finally decided he'd get changed in the bathroom. They were both guys, but showing himself naked before the other boy made Squall feel uneasy for some reason. He made his way back into the bathroom and closed the door behind him.

'I should go and find Rinoa...' Squall thought as he got dressed. 'I've been awful towards her lately...And I haven't even apologised to her yet, and it's already been a week!' Squall sighed and stepped out from the bathroom. He yelped when he saw Seifer standing right behind the door, startling the brunette.

"Ah! You scared me Seifer!" Squall mumbled, raising his face to meet the blonde's, who was much taller than Squall.

"Sorry....But I need to go to the toilet." Seifer said, trying to get past Squall. The brunette stepped aside and watched Seifer disappear into the small room. Squall felt a bit uneasy. This was the first time he let Seifer go in there alone. He believed the blonde was strong enough to manage on his own now, but couldn't stop himself from worrying.

'Ahh...there's nothing in the medical cabinet. There's no reason to worry...' Squall assured himself. He glanced at the alarm clock on the other nightstand. It was lunch time.

"Seifer, will you be all right if I go grab some food quickly? From the cafeteria." Squall asked, knocking on the bathroom door first. There was a moment of silence before Seifer gave the younger boy his answer.

"Y-yeah...I'm OK with that." The blonde coughed, his breathing ragged. Squall guessed Seifer was throwing up again behind the door. He almost had second thoughts of leaving Seifer alone, but decided to go when the image of Rinoa returned to his mind.

"Ok...I won't be long." Squall told Seifer before stepping out into the crowded hallway.

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'The first thing I need to do is find Rinoa and apologise.' Squall thought as he made his way to the main hall. When he reached his destination he stopped and looked around. The hall was filled with students, all walking in different directions. This was the busiest time of the day. Squall felt a bit uneasy. He had spent seven full days inside his dorm-room, so it felt weird being out in public again. The brunette lowered his face, feeling nervous, as he noticed people were giving him worried looks.

'Yeah yeah, I know I look like shit! But I'd like to see you after spending a week with a recovering junkie, getting almost no sleep at all!' Squall finally spotted Selphie, sitting on one of the benches, near the fountains, eating an apple. The brunette frowned when he noticed the girl was alone. Squall had been sure he'd find Rinoa with Selphie.

'Oh well...maybe she'll know where Rinoa is..' Squall thought and walked over to the petite brown-haired girl.

"Hey Selphie." Squall raised his hand, giving the girl a little wave. Selphie looked up, her green eyes widening when she saw the way Squall looked.

"Gosh! You really *have* been sick! You look awful Squall." The girl exclaimed, blinking her eyes. ll sll sat down on the bench, letting his storm-coloured eyes rest on his boots.

"So...I heard you're sharing a room with Seifer?" the girl continued, trying to make a conversation when Squall had remained silent. Squall raised his face at the mention of his ex-rival's name. He remembered Seifer was alone in their room and felt alarmed. All he suddenly wanted to do was to hurry back.

"Selphie, do you know where Rinoa is?" Squall asked, sounding hasty. Selphie blinked her green eyes, noting the urgency in Squall's tone.

"Yeah, she's at Library with Zell...But I wouldn't go meet her unless you have prepared a *really good* apology!" Selphie added, but Squall was already on his way to the Library.

"Well it was good to see you too Squall! Tch..." the girl rolled her eyes, looking at the brunette's retreating back.

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Squall entered the library, giving a polite nod as the girl at the counter welcomed him. The library was full of students; almost all of the tables were taken. Squall looked around, not seeing Rinoa or Zell anywhere.

'I have no time to play hide and seek...' Squall frowned and turned around to leave, but stopped when he heard a familiar giggle coming from behind one of the tall bookshelves.

"Stop Zell! You're killing me!" Squall heard Rinoa's laughter and walked to the direction he thought it was coming from. The brunette stopped between two bookshelves and froze when he saw Rinoa and Zell, the blonde boy's arms around *his* girlfriend's waist. Zell was obviously tickling the raven-haired girl, almost killing Rinoa with laughter. Neither of them noticed Squall and he just continued staring. The brunette frowned when he realized something about himself.

'I---I think I'm supposed to feel jealous or something...I mean there she is, my girlfriend, being held like that by another man...But---I don't feel anything...at least not jealousy!'

When Zell pulled the dark-haired girl closer, obviously to kiss her, Squall coughed, letting them know he was there too. Zell immediately pulled his hands back, blinking his eyes nervously. The colour on Rinoa's face was suddenly bright red and the girl lowered her face, knowing she was blushing.

"Squall! ...Uh...buddy...w-what's up?" Zell stammered, flashing Squall a faked smile. Before the brunette could answer however, he was stopped by Rinoa.

"Squall! It's not what it looks like! Zell was just--"

"It's ok....Rinoa...Could I talk to you in private?" Squall interrupted, the look on his face everything but accusing. This made Rinoa feel a bit less uneasy, and she gave Squall a nod, motioning for Zell to leave the two of them alone. The short blonde walked past Squall, avoiding his gaze.

"You look awful Squall." came Rinoa's opening line. Squall raised one brow at the girl's remark.

"I--I'm sorry. That was rude...Squall I-" Rinoa apologised, not really knowing how to continue her sentence. Squall sighed and leaned against one of the bookshelves.

"So...you and Zell..." he began, eyeing the girl dressed in blue.

"Squall, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean it to happen! But I never got any attention from you and-"

"I know Rinoa. And I don't blame you for anything." Squall reassured the babbling girl. Rinoa looked up, meeting Squall's eyes. The look on her flushed face was slightly confused.

"I'm sorry for neglecting our relationship. I know I should have made more time for you Rinoa, but I never did. And I'm sorry for that....So, I don't blame you. Zell will probably dedicate all his time for you....and I'm happy for that. He truly deserves you." Squall swallowed before continuing. He wasn't used to long sentences.

"I know the two of you will be happy together..." Squall gave Rinoa an approving smile.

"I---I don't know what to say Squall...Can we still be friends?" she asked, gazing Squall with her big brown eyes.

"Of course. You'll always be my friend. We've been through so much together. Nothing will ever change that." Squall smiled as the girl suddenly have him a tight hug.

"Squall, thank you!" Rinoa whispered and leaned back, smiling at the brunette. Squall sank his fingers in his hair, blushing slightly.

"Ah..it's OK..." he muttered, the image of Seifer suddenly returning to his mind. "Rinoa, I'm sorry but I gotta go, I'm in a bit of a hurry." Squall apologised and made his way back to the library entrance, the raven-haired girl following him. On his way out, Squall met Zell who was leaning against the counter, tapping his fingers nervously.

"S-Squall, dude, n-no hard feelings?" Zell asked, his voice a bit shaky. Squall just gave his friend a reassuring smile and walked out from the library, deciding to leave all the explaining to Rinoa.

'You just broke up with Rinoa...' Squall told himself, as he was walking in the direction of the dormitory. He had decided he wasn't hungry after all, and just wanted to return to Seifer. The brunette suddenly felt a bit guilty. He realised his feelings towards Rinoa had been like this for a long time. He had also known the whole time that his friend was crazy about the girl, even if Zell hadn't said anything about it. Still, Squall had continued to neglect Rinoa, but had stayed together with her, preventing Zell from getting her.

'What's wrong with me anyway? Am I emotionally handicapped or something...?' Squall frowned and tapped the code to open their dorm-room door.

::::::::::::..To be continued::::::::::.

-Yorda