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Vincent's Horrid Poetry Hour

By: Kiune
folder Final Fantasy VII › General
Rating: Adult
Chapters: 9
Views: 1,006
Reviews: 30
Recommended: 0
Currently Reading: 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
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Everyone Dies Part 2

Author's Note: A big thanks to all who took the time to bother to review and rate. For those of you who are wondering, no, we DID NOT write the bad poetry. We are the masochists who look for these poems, not the sadists who write them. We found them on fanfiction.net, where they apparently breed like fucking moogles. Anyway, "enjoy" the mutilated grammar and bottomless angst you are about to read.


We rejoin Vincent and the hopefully-alive raven as Vincent looks closer to joining the bird on the floor.

Yuffie sneaks through the shadows toward Vincent, preparing to steal materia from the drunken gunman. Without looking up, Vincent swings his gun up to aim at Yuffie, who freezes, then sneaks away again.


CLOUD

A man sat on his bed
A gun in his hand

Vincent: You bastard! You stab me and then steal my gun?
Cloud: Have you ever tried throwing yourself onto a Buster Sword? My arms would have to be seven feet long!

A hope in his head
That Tifa would understand

Tifa: Didn’t I die a few poems ago?

He had written a letter
That explained why it had to be the end of Strife
That nothing could make him better

Cid: Allow me to introduce you to alcohol. You do realize you live in a bar, don’t you?

After he had ended Vincent’s life.
Off all the people he had killed and gotten killed

Sephiroth: You’re not supposed to feel remorse; have I taught you nothing??

His own life would be the last
This was what he willed
For he could not forget the past.

Vincent: Try lying in a coffin for a few decades; I find it works wonders.
Barrett: Yeah, ‘cause you’re a shining example of good coping skills.

It was the only way
To make it right
That was why today
Before it was night

Red XIII: So, still today. During the day of today.

He had to take one last life.
He would not let another
Be the victim of Cloud Strife

Cloud: I really am an emo bastard, aren’t I.

Especially not her, his only lover
He placed the letter next to the bed.

Tifa: I sort of saw it coming; he’d been blaring My Chemical Romance for weeks by then.

His hope known
He raised the gun to his head
His cards where shown

Yuffie: But he could only summon Karibo.

His home left to Tifa to defend

Tifa: Thanks, very manly of you.
Cid: You know she wears the pants in that family anyway.

He took his life
And that was the end
The end of Cloud Strife.

Aeris: Just in case you hadn’t been paying attention.

CID

Cid looked around
The ship was old
Yet younger then him
He didn’t care
He had to pay attention

Cid: (hopefully) To the blonde on his lap?

To the bomb
He was working with

Cid: That’s the last time I’m letting the IRA borrow the airship.

The countdown didn’t stop
As he cut another wire

Yuffie: The blue wire! Cut the blue wire! It’s always the blue wire!

It wouldn’t quit
It was useless to deny

Red XIII: Hmmm, and what would possibly rhyme with deny?

The fact that he
Cid Highwind

Cid: Again, in case you forgot who this poem was about.

Was about to die

Sephiroth: Really? This is unexpected.

Another minute passed
Another minute he aged

Cid: What the hell? Is this bomb going to old me to death?

Another chance to pray
To remember his friends already dead
To know he would soon follow

Tifa: By the look of those smoker’s lungs on the X-ray he only had a month left anyway.

5 seconds left
The captain would go down with the air ship
4 seconds left
May his wife love another
3 seconds left
He would never be able to see Sarah, his unborn daughter

Cid: Oh shit! Shera was pregnant? Looks like I dodged a bullet on that one.

2 seconds left
Good bye Shera

Cid: Hellloooo 72 virgins!

Yuffie: You know, they never really specify whether those virgins are actually women.

Cid: …Fuck off, a man can dream.

1 second left
Cid closed his eyes
0 seconds left
Click, and that was the end

Sephiroth: Click? The bomb went click?

Aeris: A bit anti-climatic.

Of the one and only
Captain of that ship
Cid Highwind.

Cid: You know, I actually kinda like my death.


End

We return to Vincent, as he clumsily tries to prop the limp bird back up on its perch.

Vincent: ‘S anybody got any glue? Think I c’n make this work… Y’know, some of this poetry stuff is starting to sound not half bad…where’d I leave tha’ scotch?

He leans down to look under the chair, tangles his pointy shoes in his cloak and crashes down into a boneless red heap of Drunk Vincent.

The raven, still unconscious and having come un-propped from its perch, dives back down to join him in the dust.

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