A Matter of Spirit

Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy 7, neither the story nor anything else (exept my OCs) and I don't make any profit by writing this.

Author's note: I know, this chapter is a bit short, but the next one will be longer again. Warnings: One lemon. I didn't plan to write one in this chapter, but Rufus and Reno were simply going for it. :-)

Chapter 4: Reminiscences and thinking about the future

Although the cadet's training was physically as well as mentally quite demanding, it soon became routine for Kris. Long days of hard work were nothing new to him and he'd always been a fast learner. The only nuissance were the evening classes which he had to visit together with most of the other cadets, who had like himself only a fragmentary education. He learned that even in Midgar only relatively few of the parents could afford to send their children to good schools, while the pupils of the public schools, especially the ones under the plate, could themselves deem lucky if they could properly read and write when they left school.

So he spent his evenings together with about fourty other cadets squeezed into a much to small room and tried to learn maths, sciences and how to write essays. It was here, a few days after the official beginning of the training, where he met Tommy again.

"This stuff sucks, eh?", the boy from the slums murmured to him, " But it's good to see you made it too!" Kris nodded mutely, a frustrated expression on his face. But at the same time he was glad to see the first aquaintance he made here in the academy again. So far, he still didn't made really friends with anybody here. Not that he had trouble with any bullies, but he heard often enough the other cadets of his squad calling him "Stripey", referring to the scars on his back. "You'd better pay attention though, " whispered Tommy, "Just among friends: I tell you you're going to need this stuff when it comes to the SOLDIER entrance exams in a year. When you'll pass it and make it into second year of the academy, when the real Soldier training begins - no longer wooden swords and theory, but real blades and real materia, it's practically given that you make it into SOLDIER. The final exams aren't half as bad as the SOLDIER entrance exams. I can tell you that at very least half of the guys here in this room will be sent to the regulars then or back to their homes, wherever that might be."

Kris wanted to ask where Tommy did know this from, but the the teacher began to explain the basics of fractions and Kris had to focus as his foster mother taught him only simple arithmetics. When the class was finally finished for the day, they had only ten minutes to get to their dorms and Kris didn't had the opportunity to speak with Tommy again.

But when they'd met in the cafeteria the next day, they agreed to meet on Saturday afternoon (the cadets had free time from Saturday noon until Sunday evening) for a chat in one of the courtyards. The Sundays Tommy spent always under the plate to visit his little sister who lived in an orphanage in sector five, so Kris learned after their first Saturday afternoon meeting. The boy from the Grasslands was eager to ask Tommy were he'd get his knowledge about the procedures involving of becoming a SOLDIER. But the only answer Kris got from Tommy to his question was that he recived his information about SOLDIER training from a friend. The strange sad smile Tommy had on his face while saying this made Kris curious and eager to ask for more details. But Tommy didn't tell him anything more about this mysterious "friend".

At the end of the first month - it was a Wednesday - the long-awaited day was finally there: the cadets got their first salary. The boys got the afternoon off so that they could open an account with a bank and purchase whatever they'd need for the next month.

The branch-bank of the ShinRa General Bank was next door to the company shop in the mainbuilding and so Kris decided to follow Kunsel's advice and buy there what he thought he'd need - which, in fact, wasn't really much. But he wanted to buy the body wash which Kunsel had recommended (the free soap really burned in the eyes and smelled like a cocktail of all kind of disinfectants), a cheap wrist watch, a comb for his growing hair (Kris had decided to give up his short-cropped hairstyle - a reminder of his bad past - and instead to grow his hair as long as ShinRa rule allowed, which meant shoulder length for everyone - exept for the Trinity of course) and, just for fun ( and because he knew old Snyder would get a fit of rage), a bodylotion. He sniffed through a whole shelf of lotions until he found one to his liking. It's label said "Wutaian Lily" but it didn't smell sweet like a flower - more like a summer morning after a rainy night.

After that, he got himself some blue-jeans, a pair of cheap sneakers, some socks and a couple of t-shirts. His old clothes he'd wrapped into packing paper, without any comment, addressed them with "Snyder's Farm, Grasslands, then miles east of Marcy's trading post" and send them to Junon, where the Grassland truck would pick them up and bring them to the trading post, where Marcy would take care that the Snyders would receive it.

Then, after he'd took a look on his brandnew watch, he saw that it was only 15:30. Time enough to implement his second plan for this day and he headed for the department of SOLDIER administration.

"How are you, Miss?", he asked after he approached the counter tagged as "reception", facing the bored looking secretary. "Fine," she replied and, not bothering with any flowery phrases she asked: "What do you want, cadet?".

"Well, umm, it's a bit complicated," Kris stuttered, " Does it happen...No, oh damn...," he took a deep breath,"Does one Mr. Ramada work here?"

"No, here's nobody that goes by this name. What do you want from him cadet ?", she replied and continued with painting her nails. "Well...,"

And just in this moment appeared an elder Lady with a coffee pot behind the young receptionist: " Oh, do you mean the nephiew of Mrs. Ramada? The pink Lady as we called her ?"

When Kris nodded, she asked with a slightly worried expression: "What do yo want from him?" "Well, it's actually something concerning his aunt...," Kris muttered.

"Oh, I see...Well, you'll find Mr. Brown in room 2.34, second floor," she picked up the phone, "And what's your name and request?" "Kris Snyder. And, well, I wanted to thank his aunt for driving me to Midgar. I wondered if he could give this message to Mrs. Ramada."

The woman frowned and dialed a number: " Mr. Brown ? Here's a cadet Snyder who wanted to speak with you concerning a private matter...It's about your aunt, Mr, Brown. Shall I send him up? Ok, Mr. Brown."

She faced the young cadet again: " Take the lift to the second floor and then turn to the right until you reach room 2.34. Mr. Brown is awaiting you."

When he entered the small office, he saw a man with dull blond hair which was already thinning out. At first he thought he man must have been in his fourties. But after a second glance he saw how young the man really must have been. The much-to-early tear sacs, the drown down corners of his mouth and the folds on his forehead added at least fifteen years to his actual age. This guy was the poster-boy for the paper-pushers of this world.

"So....Cadet Snyder, what did you want to ask me about my aunt. And I suggest to hurry up since I've still got a lot of work to do."

" Oh, Sir, I just wanted to ask you if you could tell my thanks and and my greetings to your aunt. You.,..you must know that it was Mrs., Ramada who drove me to Midgar.And I arrived just in time to take part in the assessment center for cadets."

"I see, " the bureaucrat said, " So this would mean you arrived here at seven o' clock on the thirtieth of August ?"

Kris nodded. "Well, I'm sorry to tell you that my aunt died about four hours later in an accident." said Mr. Brown.

"But... but how? She was such an amazing driver!"

"Oh, come on! She was a driver from hell! I've told her for years she should give up that sportscar and buy instead a subcompact car, like all the other elder ladies here in Midgar. But, no, she didn't listen to me. A few hours after your arrival, around eleven o'clock, she collided with a truck on one of Midgar's highways and was dead in an instance."

"But, Sir...."

"No, cadet, she was an old woman who drove a much too powerful sportscar. Did you know how old my aunt was?"

Whe Kris shook his head, Brown said: "She was seventy- six years old.. Much too old for a Dynamotors M6000. But like I said, she didn't listen to me though."

Kris timidly asked: " Where....do you know, where she's buried?" "Here in Midgar we don't bury corpses, we burn them. You'll find her ashes at Midgar central columbarium. Seventh floor, I think. But I'd suggest you'd ask the custodian in the first floor"

Kris nodded, still surprised by the cold demeanor of Mrs.'s Ramadas nephiew: " Thank you, Sir." "Is that all, cadet? " Brown asked. When Kris nodded, Brown said: " Then you should leave now, I've still got work to do." The boy from the Grasslands thanked Mr. Brown and left the office.

XXXXX

Rufus ShinRa sighed and rubbed his temples, glancing again at the papers lying on his desk. Three teams of researchers and everyone of them  came to the same result. If this was true...

He heard silent steps behind him, hardly audible for anyone else. But he knew the sound of these steps so well like his own, the steps of his lover, the only person in the world whom he'd trust enough to let his defenses down...

"What is it baby?", Reno asked quietly, "Something's bothering you, yo?" and laid a hand, still slightly wet from the shower, tenderly on Rufus's shoulder. Rufus lips twitched. Reno had changed a lot during these last months but he would never give up using his 'yo's' from time to time, as well as his smile and the VP was thankful for that.

Rufus laid his hand on his lover's, grasping it lovingly. "You remember this report from Reeve from two months ago?"

"Hm, do you mean this paper concerning the consequences of draining the Mako stream? Your father chucked it away into the closest wastepaper basket right before Reeve's eyes."

"And I retrieved it from the trash and read it. Reeve might be sometimes an idealist but in no case he's a nutcase. I found his conclusions disconcerting enough to check them thoroughly. So, I engaged a team of ecologists from Junon University and a second team from Cosmo Canyon. At the same time I checked the prices for grains, potatoes and vegetables from Kalm over the last five years. They were increasing, slowly but steadily. And the results of the research teams testified Reeve's thesis: The draining of the Mako is affecting Kalm. In five year's time, the people who're living on the plate will have to pay a lot more for food."

"And the people under the plate will die of hunger. They hardly manage to feed themselves even now with the rising prices for potatoes and flour," said Reno.

"Yes." Rufus looked at his lover, fully aware that this 'yes' sounded like a death sentence, "It's the same with fish from Junon. Poultry and other meat have becoming quite expensive for years now. In five to ten years the steppe-forming will cause serious problems in providing Midgar with food - even on the plate. In about twenty years , desertification will spread over the whole northern halfth of the continent." Rufus closed his eyes for a moment." But long before that's going to happen, we'll have to face rebellions caused by hunger. It won't be only the end of Midgar. It would be the end of ShinRa too."

"So, there's no alternative but to look out for other energy sources?" Reno asked lowly.

Rufus nodded: " I'm afraid, yes. We could manage to replace most of the Mako with oil - at least for the next fifty years. Until then, renewable energy sources like wind, sun and water should be finally available."

"Are you going to talk about this with your Dad?" The VP looked at his lover: "I probably should do so. But he doesn't listen to me anymore. As you know, his maxime had been always ' Make money, gain power and do it fast, and then - Devil may care'. When I was seven, I even had to remind him that it would be wise to build a secrete escape way into his office. He had been always so sure about his power to defeat everything.But at least he followed my advice then. But now..., " Rufus shrugged.

"You think it may has something to do with our...relationship?" "No, my love - at least not very much. Of course he worries about offspring. But I suggested him there might be a solution for that..."

"You and a woman?" Reno cackled, "I'd like to see that!"

"I was talking about a surrogate mother and test-tube fertilization," Rufus smiled dryly, "What's more affecting his power of judgment than us is the influence of people like Heidegger, Hojo and Scarlet - and maybe his own growing age - especially Hojo. Reno, my love..." Rufus stood up and embraced his lover, " This information is utmost secrecy, not even Tseng knows about this...Will you keep your mouth shut about this?"

Reno nodded: "Yes. If you want me to I won't even tell Tseng about. And you know that he's the ...closest thing to a father I've ever got."

" I know, love, I know," Rufus sighed. "Ok. I've managed to get a report from my father's personal physician. It indicates that my father is affected by obstinacy of old age - and possibly the beginnings of senility."

"He's got only a couple of years over sixty. Are they sure about that?"

"I don't know. But it matches to my own observations. Dr. Fackler wanted to do an MRI, but father refused to undergo it. I'll try to talk with him tomorrow. But if he isn't able to react responsible...I'll maybe have to take different measures. But at first, I'll try to reason with him."

After saying that, he led Reno to the bed (which was once, only a year ago, covered in white silk, when he was still used to sleep alone, but now, on Reno's demand, the sheets were of the darkest black satin - oh, they did match so well with his lover's long red hair, laid out around his head like a fiery fan after Rufus had loosened the ponytail!).

He knew there was no fast way to have sex with Reno. His lover's past experiences when he - still a kid then - had to live in a brothel, wouldn't allow it, so Rufus took his time. He kissed and pinched Reno's nipples, stroke the inside of his thighs softly, oh so softly with his short clipped nails and pressed tenderly his fingertips into the folds of his groin, carefully avoiding his lover's dick, teasing him mercyless, until Reno gasped and begged desperately for more and Rufus took him in his mouth. When the organ was twitching greedily, he inserted one slicked finger carefully in Reno's pink entrance until he found his lovers sweet spot, which resulted in more begging and writhing. Then, when Reno signaled that he was ready for him, Rufus entered him , beginning with slow tender movements, until he finally pounded vigorously into his lover. Reno cried out his lust, spraying his creamy white seed over his body and Rufus filled him with his semen.

When they were finished, both of them rested, exhausted and satisfied. Reno opened his sleepy eyes and murmured: " So what's the matter about this baby-thing?"

"Shouldn't we discuss this later, when we regained our sanity again?", Rufus shuckled lowly. "Nah...nah, I want to talk about it now, before I've got my marbles together again. Later I want to discuss the Lazard thing, but right now I want to know what you're planning concerning this kid," the red head insisted stubbornly.

"Very well then, Love," Rufus sighed, " Like I said I suggested an test-tube fertilization, involving a surrogate mother. Although very hesitantly and after a long discussion, my father accepted the suggestion finally - as long that there will be proof that I'm the father. But what I didn't told him was..." The VP swallowed.

"What is it babe? Common, tell me!"

"Maybe it's foolish, but I don't want to sire a child with an unknown woman. I...I want it to be our child - yours and mine."

Reno's eyes snapped open and - indeed a very rare sight - he looked seriously shocked. "Holy shit! Babe, I'm bottoming for you and I really like it. But that doesn't mean that I've ...you know that I haven't got any female parts on me."

Rufus shuckled: " Now, Darling you're the one who sounds foolish. You're a man and I love you for being that. What I was trying to explain was..., well I was pondering about this for some time, even before my father brought up the topic. And then I had a confidential conversation with Professor Chang from the Midgard University Hospital. He's an expert in genetics and...cloning."

When Reno gasped, Rufus tried to appease him: "No, of course I don't want a clone of myself. What we were talking about was something completely different - although the process is related."

"Oookay, so what exactly we're talking about?" Reno queried anxiously.

"Professor Chang could gather some egg cells from the surrogate - or any other woman, then remove the original genetic information and replace it with yours, extracted from some of your sperms. The rest of the procedure would work like a normal test-tube fertilization. The egg cell with your genetic information would be waiting in a petry-dish, then they'll add my seed and..well, the rest will be done by nature. And when the fertilisation is a success, it will be injected into the surrogate mother's uterus."

"So, at least concerning the genetics, I'd be the mother?" "In scientific terms....yes. Your DNA will compose the mitochondrial DNA of the baby. But in our lifes, we both can be the fathers of this child. Please, just think about it. It's ok if you don't want to do it. I'd never force you...Just think about it." whispered Rufus, stroking his lovers cheeks." "Shit. Please gimme some time, yo?", murmured Reno. "Of course my love. Take yourself all the time you need to think about it.", Rufus ensured him.

XXXXXX

Early on Sunday morning, Kris took the bus to sector four above the plate, where Midgar's central columbarium was situated as he learned from the virtual city map. He entered the big hall, noticed a small shop where tiny bouquets of artifical flowers were sold and found finally the counter with the custodian, who was the eldest man Kris ever saw in his young life. His head was completetely bald and his face was a pattern of shriveled skin and wrinkles,

After Kris greeted the custodian, the old man looked at him with a kind smile and asked: "Hello there, boy. And what can I do for you?"

"Sir, I wanted to visit the grave of Mrs. Ramada. Do you know where it is?"

"Oh, we haven't got graves here. Only niches for the urns in our columbarium. Do you know the full name of Mrs. Ramada?"

Kris shook his head: " No, Sir. But I know that she died...," he swallowed and then somehow managed to continue, " But I know that she died about four weeks ago, on the 30st of August, in a car accident."

"Hmmm, that's something I can work with, " said the old man and typed something into his computer. He looked up again and saw that the boy's eyes were wet with unshed tears.

"Hey, hey boy, please don't be sad. She's joined the lifestream now. Believe me, she will be happy there. She's kind of important to you, I guess?"

" She resqued me. She brought me here in time to take part in the cadets assessment center. I owe her everything."

"And your uniform tells me that you've made the cut. The more happy she'll be!" the old man said,"Ah, here's it: eighth floor, row seven, niche number 35. The lifts are over there."

And the custodian pointed to the backmost part of the hall. Kris thanked the man and headed for the lifts. When he arrived at the eight floor his first thought was that all this reminded him of a big locker room in grey marble. There were rows and rows with niches which where covered with sleek plates and between them were banks built of the same material like the high rows which contained the niches for the urns. Then he found the one labeled as seven and finally he stood in front of the niche which contained Mrs. Ramada's ashes.

The grey marble plate said: " Louise Mariposa Ramada, Born 3-12-1926 , Died 8-30-2002 , Join the Lifestream in Peace! 

There weren't any flowers like in the other niches and Kris thought he'd could have at least bought one of the cheap looking tiny bouquets made of artificial flowers .

He laid his fingertips on the plate and then he sat down on the bank of grey marble and thought: " Oh Mrs. Ramada, I wish you'd be here now. I mean, alive, in flesh. You should know that I made it, although I don't really know how. But anyway, I'm a cadet now and I just wish you could be here.", and then again, suddenly he had a reminiscence of high grass, moving in harmony, swinging with himself sitting on a swing and he heard the whisper in his head, the grass moving together with him, back and forth, back and forth: But I am, sweetheart. I always will watch over you. And don't worry, I'm happy here. Just be brave and everything will be allright.