My Road

Disclaimer:

I do not own Final Fantasy 7, It’s original characters, places, etc. Nor do I make any money from this fanfiction. The only things that are mine are my own original added characters. And the situations or new places added to flesh out my own story.

I do not own the song "destroyed" by within temptation... I just like their music... and this song fit in this chapter

Warnings:

Some not-so-nice things happen to Reno.... his father is back... and things go from bad to worse. Abuse, and sexual abuse (Rape).

Notes:

I am going to include a song in here... though no one is singing it... it’s for the 'feel' of the chapter only, if that isn’t liked very much. Please let me know. But, I feel that there is a lot of music that fits the feelings of my story throughout, and don’t know how else to include it.

My Road

~Chapter 5~

Who could have come to his home while he was gone, a neighbor, maybe? But Reno's senses tingled. He didn’t know why... but he really didn’t want to go inside. But he knew he had to. So he took a breath and stepped into the doorway. He no sooner stepped inside then a booming voice made him stop short.


"What the HELL do ya' think yer' DOING!? I precisely said ta work an’ get yer' Ass back here. An have food ready fer me!" His father got up from the pallet he'd been resting on, obviously just waiting for Reno. He looked a bit more disheveled than the last time He'd seen him. His eyes were rimmed in red and as he came closer Reno could smell strong alcohol on him.


Reno automatically tensed up to be hit. He expected a fist to his face or ribs. Instead his father grabbed him by his already torn and needing mending shirt and threw him face first against their table, even though it was close to the floor. Reno saw stars.


His father lowered his voice to a subtle and low tone. "Ya' know... what do think yer' good for? huh?“ He flipped reno over facing him and pulled him up to his knees by a fisted shirt under his chin. "Where’s the Gil for the month huh?! How much did you WASTE!" He raised his voice again. And with that he took Reno’s new clothes from his arm and threw them on the floor.

Then reaching back and grabbing Reno by the hair this time. "Give me yer' Gil, now... why else ya think yer workin for"


"Here father... here. I would have not bought the clothes but..." Reno pulled the last of the Gil from his pocket. But just as he was going to hand it to his father, that was when he felt the wind knocked out of him.


"Why are ya so stupid, all ya did, was take her focus from doin the things she should... an look where it ended ya! And this!... Whats this!?" He ended with yanking hard on reno's very short hair. "I know ya didnt do this yer'self! How much did ya waste doin' this!?" Again Reno opened his mouth but couldnt say a thing. He ended up with a back hand to the face.


"ya whelp!... I should give ya to the traffickers!" He grabbed Reno up by his shirt again. This time ripping it where he grabbed it, so he grabbed Reno's pants and shoved him back against the table. "I'll whip ya good... stay yer ass put."


His father went over near the little stove and grabbed the fire poker that consisted of a thin piece of scrap metal and came back to Reno.


Reno was scared witless but he couldn’t move. His face went white and he lifted his face to look at the stove, something, and anything to focus on. The stove... Mother cooked meals... stood there... the stove.


-'I did my best to please you

But my best was never good enough

Somehow you're only able to see

All I am not'-


His father grabbed his suspenders from behind and yanked them and the pants down with one quick movement. "I shoulda done this long ago." His father said and without warning let loose.


The metal bit into Reno's lower back first, hard and hot and sharp. He couldn’t help but let out a yelp. Then again... again. Now across his butt. Why, why was father doing this. "Ah!" He let out a small shout as his father brought it down instead of across and it hit down his crack and onto his small sac. The tears came to his eyes but he couldn’t let them fall.


His father grunted, feeling himself become aroused as he watched the bloody welts come to the surface on his sons lower back... then his ass... now his balls. Ohm yes... just a little more...


He brought the metal across Reno's ass a few more times... each time causing a fresh welt and line of blood to form. Watching his marks show up on his boy's ass turned him on now more than anything had before. Without any warning or thought he turned the metal over and pushed it into Reno's small virgin opening.


-'Did you ever look behind

Aren't you afraid of the pieces you'll find?

I have failed you

But you have failed me too'-


Reno bit back a cry! The white searing pain as it tore into his backside. Nothing... Not even the seconds before had compared to this. Everything went white and silent. 'Father... why...' He felt his father’s grip on his upper back holding him down. And Reno couldn’t move, fight it, cry out, nothing. The pain felt like... his father was killing him. Maybe he'd join the lifestream.... his mother... no! He needed to stay here. His focus returned to the room. He could feel a warm liquid run down the inside of his legs, and could feel his father moving the stove poker in and out of his torn and painful opening. Maybe it will start to go numb...


Reno's father pulled the metal out and stood there breathing heavy for a minute. His boy had been silent and unmoving. He wanted him to know his place. With a grunt he brought the metal piece down hard on Reno's hand that was outstretched in front of him on the table... missing the right hand but hearing a loud crack when it met with his left hand.


-'It's so easy to destroy and condemn

The ones you do not understand

Do you ever wonder if it’s justified'-


Reno cried out "Ahhh!..." His hand recoiled out of reflex. He couldn’t cry.... He couldn’t cry... He needed to be silent.


"That’s right.... ya know yer place do ya?" His father sounded winded. But it was winded with lust. His eyes were dilated. and Reno's throbbing and bruised and bloodied opening was right there... it was beautiful. The blood welts criss crossing above and over the opening with the small hole spilling crimson fluid down the boy’s ball and legs. "Yes.... ya need me boy... ya know ya do... ya need yer father ta teach ya yer place... and what yer mother could never teach ya......"


-'It's so easy to destroy and condemn

The ones you do not understand

In your life why didn't you ever try'-


Reno was gasping for air still from what had happened he didn’t make sense of why he felt his father’s finger on his back. But when he focused he could feel him tracing the lines... the fresh pain had numbed the skin slightly. But his fingers still left a trail that burned behind. If felt like he was tracing each of the lines he'd made. Reno bit his lip still. He wanted it over...behind him...


The older man grunted in satisfaction then groaned as he reached into his own pants and pulled out his throbbing member. It was dripping in excitement for what was to come. He was panting lightly in lust and want. he reached forward and traced the line that went from the top of Reno’s crack down to his boyish and un-dropped balls. Then with a quick movement he plunged himself in deep... the pathway made an easier fit in the small boy because of the lubrication of his own blood.


Reno cried out when he felt the penetration... "NOooo!!..... ah!..." The pain was actually almost nonexistent it was so bad. His whole body suddenly went cold. His eyes went wide, then blank.... and all of Gaia died around him.


-'I close my eyes as I walk the thin line between love and hate

For the person with the same blood in his veins

You show no regrets

About all the things you did or said

I have failed you

But believe me you failed me too...'-


The man pounded, pounded into the boy without mercy. With a feral grin on his face the whole time knowing only pleasure in this moment. He felt the end come quickly as the tightening started ... it spread quickly as he plunged deeply one more time and came with a loud groan leaning down over the small, broken, and bloodied boy.


-'It's so easy to destroy and condemn

The ones you do not understand

Do you ever wonder if it’s justified'-


Reno was in a faraway place. Maybe it was the universe... because for that moment everything was dead and white on Gaia. Maybe from outside of the planet he could curl into a ball and rest for a while. He could think about the happy things. His mother, warm, and comforting... holding him and humming that song to him again. She had his blanket wrapped around him and wore her necklace. Then the Kit's that he played with were there. They were all playing together on a sunny hillside. He, his mother, and the large fully grown feline-like creatures were all happy and warm. And the place he was now was like a cocoon.... yes away from Gaia....


-'It's so easy to destroy and condemn

The ones you do not understand

Do you ever wonder if it’s justified'-


Reno heard a voice. It was almost warm... It was calling him. His name...


"Reno... boy..." His father called out to him with a false sense of security about him, as he held Reno in his arms on Reno's pallet.


Was it all a bad dream? His father was home now, and he'd just fallen asleep. Maybe he could be safe now. His father had never held him like this. It was warm. His voice was nice and his arms felt strong. This is a dream still.....


"Thats it boy... yer fine now... jus' rest. Ya don need ta work tomorrow... rest fer now." He laid Reno down on the bed. Bloodied and with his pants around his knee's. His father then stood with a grin, feeling better than he had in a long while. He'd have to come back more often... He needed to keep better track of the boy. And it would give him a little meaning, needing to keep Reno in line. He had nothing else to live for.


~later that week~


The pain wasn’t really that bad. He just had to think past it. His father had hung around for about 3 days telling Reno to get back to work on the 3rd. Reno couldn’t move the following morning after what he'd thought had been a nightmare. It was real... but not completely to him. His hand hurt him worse, in physical pain and in pride. He wrapped it with some scrap burlap to hold it taut. But that was the hand he used the most. He'd have to favor it for a while and make do with his right for a time.


He'd struggled with work. Not able to do as much and as long. Not making nearly as much as he needed. His father had taken the last of the Gil with him when he left. He didn’t know why or where his father went to. He'd told him he'd be back and this time to be home. Reno would make sure he was.


He'd visit the Kit's on his day off if he could still. He needed a place to run to. to hide... his mind worked but he needed some physical reprieve also. Maybe that would work as one for him.


He'd worked with Bonno a time or two since that time... but hadn’t said a word. Everyone knew his father was tough on him and just figured it was the same thing as always. Little Red head... being taught a thing or two... Probably a punk...


He wouldn’t think about what happened. He knew what it was. Growing up in the slums you certainly weren’t shielded from such things. You grew up, 'just knowing'.... He thought he loved his father but couldn’t decide if it was love really or fearful respect. He'd been kind to him after that. Kind for his father anyway. Not as kind as some people could be... like his mother. But even talked nicer rather than only speaking when angry. Reno made dinner from rations each night he was there, and was behaved, and quiet, and went to work when his father demanded it.


Maybe things would be easier this time around. He'd do things right. Hadn’t his mother last said 'listen to your father...work hard... make him proud', yeah that was it. He just needed to prove his worth.


~the months pass...~


Reno fell into an endurance mode. He worked hard all week. Made dinner. Mended his clothes... dreamed. Played with the Cuahl... as it was more that, than a Kit anymore. It was getting huge. Its siblings had either been caught or had withdrawn away where the other adults hid, but this one stayed behind. Reno named it 'Kit'. He'd taught it to 'hide' when he left and somehow he stayed uncaught and alive and well every time that Reno saw him. He became Reno's only true friend.


He also got in the habit of expecting his father every couple of weeks. He'd come home... and he'd molest Reno... he'd hurt him... but never as bad again. Reno came to expect it and accept it for what it was. He'd become his mothers replacement. Only he could at least work. He would go into that blank void outside of Gaia when it hurt too much. But sometimes it didn’t, sometimes he felt complete. More real when his father used him. Maybe he was wrong for that. But every time... his father would hold him after wards. Sometimes like a little child cradled at his chest and sometimes he'd lay down with him on His pallet till he fell asleep. Then Reno would sneak off and curl up on his own in his blanket.


Times like that he would sit and think about his mother... but also about his father. He seemed so sad. Or angry... both made him seem lonely and confused at the world. He felt him withdrawing more and more. He drank a lot... usually showing back up at home drunk... those were the times he hurt him the most. Yelling at him about his mother and for making him have to be alive... Reno didn’t understand at all...


In the time that Reno's hand had been out of commission he'd learned to use his right one just as well. And he was growing lankier and a bit stronger too. He could keep up with most of the older boys and some of the men even that worked the scraps. He was 9 years old now... closer to being a man...


His father hadn't let him get another haircut. He had to tie it back in a tail then wrap it with cloth to make sure he didn’t get hurt from the scrap or any machines. And he wasn’t allowed to chop for clothes. Once or twice his father had just shown up with a newer shirt or pants as the others wore out. So again... Reno thought maybe he accepted Reno more.


He missed his mother... her warmth and sound of her voice wasn’t as strong...

~1 year later~

"Are ya sure yo!?" He asked Bonno again.


"No Red boy.... I dont need you ta come along wit' me. I'm all packed to go. " He looked at the small bundle on the floor, then glanced around his small home. His mother had passed a few months ago making it even easier to leave this place. He was headed up... He'd sign up to join the army. "But... I will miss ya.... you gotta grow up some more, then come look me up. I may be a SOLDIER by then. Who knows?" He shrugged his shoulders and started out the door.


Reno was hell bent on helping his friend. But he knew if they were caught he'd be dead meat. So he resigned to the sad fact. "Well... anyway yo... you learn lots. And don’t just light people on fire." He finished with their little salute. Bringing his pointer finger up like a gun to his forehead in a duel then saluting down with it.


"Oh god's boy, yer' never gonna let me live that down are you... didn’t even think you'd remember that anyhow." Bonno saluted him back then started in the direction the chutes came from. He knew one of the drivers from the scrap place that’d help him get to the upper plate... then it was all up to him from there.


Reno had really come to enjoy Bonno's company in the time they'd worked together. The older boy had taught Reno some quick wit and had always been a source of fun frustration. Outside of work they'd only spent a couple of hours together. One day maybe Reno would meet another person who could be a peer like that. He didn’t consider anyone a friend. But a peer wasn’t a bad guy and that was good enough for Reno.


Reno still paid way above average attention to all the going’s on's around him. His different senses were very well tuned. He'd gotten good at picking up subtlety's in peoples body language and even their voice to the point where he could usually tell when someone was lying or excited or angry... almost anything. And he'd learned how to tell if someone was trustworthy or not.


With all this and still a little under 10 years old and he still felt that he didn’t know his father. He couldn’t read him yet. But he could tell, there was some immense pain underneath his father’s skin. Maybe it was just the fact that he was still too young to fully comprehend all mature emotions...


The months would pass like the last. Only it would seem easier as Shinra seemed to be booming at this point. Rations were more substantial. Almost always two meals and pay increased slightly... as everything increased a bit. More people were beginning to talk positively... maybe more life would pick up in the slums... life would surely brighten. That is... until mention of word about trafficking had spread faster and more frequent. Few understood what really went on. And much fewer still... even Wanted to know.


Months came and went... Reno turned 10... Things seemed to lighten for him yet again. Something was coming... he could feel it....

~~~End Chapter 5~~~


A/N:

-couple of things, things really darkened for Reno in regards to his father. His dad is sick... but we knew that would come, didn’t we... I spoke in the context of simpler words such as 'butt, and sac' when it was like in Reno's POV ... and words such as 'ass and balls' when it was his father. You probably caught that. But I didn’t want you thinking I was just a wimp or completely illiterate (although I probably am... illiterate that it is... tee hee)

-I'm trying to cover a little more ground in each chapter... so that the story will progress a bit more in each reading.

-yes... things will still be bad... maybe worse before they get better. Yes still. this is angst. I hope to post another fic soon that’s a bit lighter hearted... as well as a couple of side fics for this soon.

-and I finished before 3:30 am! *smiles* its only about 2:30 am *smile falls* yay for me....


New Note:

I have done a spell and grammar check.. but still feel free to let me know if something doesn’t look right (aside from the ‘slum talk’ that’s supposed to look wrong he he)