The elusive one liner game
folder
Final Fantasy VII › Het - Male/Female
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
1,328
Reviews:
2
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Final Fantasy VII › Het - Male/Female
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
1,328
Reviews:
2
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Final Fantasy VII, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
The elusive one liner game
The elusive one liner game
Summary: Never challenge Vincent when the prize is alone time with a chick he has a thing for.
Pairings: Vincent / Yuffie
Feedback: uh ya I might add more well im allredy sticking a lemon on the end might as well
Author’s notes: joy I love this story :)
Disclaimer: I don’t own ff7 and I found the list of oneliners on the internet…. Well a few are made up.
he, he, he revamped, it gets worse in chapter two the real funny ones are in there.^,^ this is a A.U; because I don't kill Sephy poo(And Vincent and Yuffie are a couple -,o)
L.K. Synthesis
P.S. sorry if I misspelled anything I'll be sure to find a spell check (I'm a Country Hick ok I was born around jets but in Austin Texas. or at lest that's what the humans think. -. o I'm over 1,000 years old what do you think, You humans are strange I had to double space just to make everything look right. Oh well some of you make since.)
^*^*^*^
Ch1: And so it begins....
"And why are you bothering us again?" Asked Vincent to a very amused Cloud. They had defeated Sephiroth, well sort of, he was still alive, and they resurrected Aries and Zack.(on top of all the troubles they already had)
"Because you," Cloud points to Vincent "need to get a life. And I thought it would be inserting to give you a chance to get rid of all of us except her, " Cloud points to Yuffie who appears to only be inserted in getting Vincent to kick Clouds ass out so she could seduce her vampire (if you don't know me thin let me explain I always pair Vincent and Yuffie. ^, ^ Ask the lill-moonba) " for the rest of the week, that means for four days. You and 'the brat' all alone..."
Vincent paused for a monument to think, " ok how about we play the One Liner Game." Vincent grinned evilly making Yuffie shiver.
"Hay!" she finally spoke up "Vinnie, what's with the devil grin."
"No one has ever beaten me at the One Liner Game before!" He whispered into her ear nipping on it as well. (He's got fangs and I can prove it) Yuffie had the devil grin on now.
^*^*^*^
After everyone had been assembled for the game, of curse Sephiroth Zack and Cloud made a couple bets. Like how long can Vincent and Yuffie go without getting into a make out session, thin Tifa reminded cloud of his little habit of intruding on her 'bath time', and he was quiet.
"Ok Vin, how is this game played?" Asked Tifa wanting him to win so Cloud would have to eat his words. ^, ^
"Its easy..." he started, "each of us takes turns saying the one liners we know, heard and some you could have made up, who ever has the most wins, none can be repeated twice. Why don't you go first Tifa?"
"Ok lets see...He who laughs last thinks slowest!
*Every one snickers, but Cloud that was dumbfounded. * (its a pause to let everyone stop laughing)
The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
*Cloud was still dumbfounded but started to snicker, when everyone was laughing. *
90% of all statistics are made up.
*More laughter.*
A diplomat thinks twice before saying nothing.
*Aries tried not to snort (ok I hate Aries she's a snob look at what she says in the game.)*
Alone: in bad company. (If that's a grammar error I'm a dolphin, I copped these from a list my friend gave me)
*Some people were rowing on the floor *
As I said before I never repeat myself.
*Now everyone was on the floor, including Vincent who didn't expect Tifa to know 'that one.'(If you haven't realized by now this is to emphasize the pause.)*
Do steamrollers really roll steam?
*Cloud stopped laughing to stair at Tifa who returned a death stair and a cow dies in background (its an anime joke me n' my friend made up)*
And the last one witch I saw on a bumper sticker... I hate to repeat gossip, so I will only say this once, now Cloud it's your turn."
*Everyone looks at cloud*
"Om." said cloud, "Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
*Tifa kisses cloud while everyone laughs and awww's (don't look at me I don't know what ambiguity is)*
Lottery: a tax on people who are bad at math.
*Just make this one up*
Puritanism: the haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy.
*Sephiroth tries not to look guilty as the others laugh."
When there's a will, I want to be in it.
*Everyone looks at cloud in amusement, no one expected him to make it this far.*
All generalizations are false, including this one.
*Now people are laughing again*
You can't have everything, where would you put it?
*Everyone snickers saying, as it isn't that funny. *
A day not wasted is a day wasted!
*Everyone: ? *
Floggings will continue until morale improves
*Vincent shakes his head and pays more attention to the ninja in his lap. (Reference to the fact that I'm a yuffintine fan)*
Death is the answer to the question 'Why?' 502 Do fish get thirsty?
*everyone laughs but Aries who knew the answer to that one. *
I feel like a fugitive from the law of averages...that's my last one your turn Zack"
"Me...
I use to have a handle on life, thin it broke.
*Everyone laughs cause that would be the truth. *
I want to die peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandfather, not screaming, terrified, like his passengers.
*Some snicker some make faces. *
I'm as confused as a baby in a topless bar
*Baret falls over laughing (along with the other perverts in the group) everyone else just looks baffled *
Friendship is one soil in two bodies.... Its your turn Sephy."
Sephiroth looked up," Why are you involving me in this? Oh well if it will get you to shut the hell up.
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing!
*The others were laughing and rolling on the floor *
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
*Everyone was trying not to laugh too hard. *
I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minuet of it.
*Laughter. again. *
Criminal lawyer is a redundancy.
*By now you probably know what's happening *
It's not the fall that kills you. It's the sudden stop at the end.
*Gee if I were there I would be in hysterics that one matches him really good this is what the others are thinking 'if he knows so many of these why doesn't he start a stand up routine and be marry.' *
A conscience does not prevent sin. It only prevents you from enjoying it.
*Snickering. *
A friend in need is a pest indeed.
*The laughing could be heard from outside, and people were wondering what was so funny. *
All I want is a warm bed, a kind world, and unlimited power.
*Everyone was laughing so hard saying as they were expecting that one. *
An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
*Everyone was laughing but Vincent who knew what he was talking about. *
As long as I can remember, I've had amnesia.
*That's all it took to get Vincent laughing again. *
Efficiency takes time! Frugality: who can afford it?
*I didn't find this one funny but they got it pretty good. *
Forgive your enemies. but REMEMBER THEIR NAMES!
*Sephiroth had to prevent himself from snickering the others were laughing so hard. *
Help stamp out mental illness, or I'll kill you!
*Sweet drops. *
The world's one giant freak show, and I'm the star.
*Everyone was laughing again. *
If your feeling down, beet a Wall-Mart greeter half to death with a led pipe, this would do nothing to solve the problem however it is quite fun.
*The others were thinking he made all these up to force them to be quiet. *
Fortunately I'm not the smartest person you will meet I'm the dumbest. Ok cid lets see how many you know."
Cid looked at every one " Hard work has future pay off, laziness pays off now. And I bet you I could stop Gambling. Ok Brat it's your turn.
*Everyone looks shocked. *
"Well," Yuffie said. "Few women admit their age, few men act theirs.
*Aries and Tifa were laughing. *
Every time I built a character, I've regretted it. If the shoe fits buy it.
*Hyistiricel laughter broke out. *
A dirty book is rarely dusty. a mind is a terrible thing to Grawd. I forgot
*Even more laughter. *
Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain. And most do. Bugs are suns of glitches!
*Vincent grabbed Yuffie's slim waist, (she had been sitting in his lap the hole time. told you I was a yuffintine fan *
Confusion not only reigns, it pours. everyone is enlightened to my opinion.
*People were laughing so hard their sides hurt. *
Grow your own dope. plant a man.*she added in a wispier* not mine thou.
*Everyone was laughing mainly at Vincent. *
Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional. ok, Vinney dearest. make Cloud eat his words."
Everyone was snickering but Cloud who was willing to bet that, by the grin on his face that all of them didn't come close to beating him at this game.. Vincent without leaving time for the others to register what he was saying before it was too late started to list the one-liners they hadn't yet said.
"We are born naked, wet and hungry. These things get worse. Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive. Better to under stand a little thin to misunderstand a lot. Okay, who put a 'stop payment' on my reality check?
*The others were laughing so hard that Vincent had to stop so they could calm down. *
Change is inevitable except from a vending machine. A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject. Have you ever dated somebody because you were too lazy to commit suicide?
*If your not laughing your head off or at lest getting your parents/ people looking at you weird. I'm gona have to poke you with a stick. *
'Tis better to be thought a fool, thin open your mouth and remove all doubt. A chicken is an eggs way of reproducing more eggs. A friend: someone who likes you even after they know you. A waste is a terrible thing to mind. Always remember no matter where you go, there you are.
*Already Vincent was listing and coming close to the max and showed no signs of stopping any time soon it was well possible that he had gone over the max. *
Ambition is the last refuge to the failure. Angels can fly because they take themselves so lightly. Bigamy: one wife too many. Monogamy: same thing. Borderline psychotic with hermit-like tendencies.
*Everyone looked at Cid and laughed. *
Chose heaven for climate, hell for society. Constant change is here to stay. Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system. Everyone hates me because I'm paranoid.
*Yuffie snickered and flung her arms around Vincent's neck and gave him a peck on the cheek. *
Everyone is gifted, some open the package sooner. Friends come and go, enemies accumulate. Give your child mental blocks for Christmas. Gravity doesn't exist, the earth sucks.
*S. D. Scythe was laughing his head off when he heard that one. *
Gun control is being able to hit your target. How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand! How much deeper would the ocean be with out sponges? I still miss my ex-wife. BUT my aim is improving.
*Yuffie was imaging Vincent trying to shoot a Lucy look-alike with the death penalty. *
I can resist anything but temptation. If a schizophrenic threatens to commit suicide is it considered a hostage situation? Before you criticize someone walk a mile in his or her shoes, that way when you criticize them you're a mile away and you have their shoes. *Vincent has a big grin on his face. * I win GET LOST!"
Every one got up to leave but a pair of strong arms stopped Yuffie. When the others were heading down to casta de la soil Vincent whispered in her ear "Not you, I have a different kind of torment in store for you." Yuffie was 'turned on' to see the devil grin had found its way onto Vincent's face once more. While the others were at the beach the happy couple was going to make Cloud's return a living hell.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
a/n ma hahahaha. it ends there hehehe. you figure out what will happen from here. don't for get to review oh btw there are more games to come
Ha I said cum!
Summary: Never challenge Vincent when the prize is alone time with a chick he has a thing for.
Pairings: Vincent / Yuffie
Feedback: uh ya I might add more well im allredy sticking a lemon on the end might as well
Author’s notes: joy I love this story :)
Disclaimer: I don’t own ff7 and I found the list of oneliners on the internet…. Well a few are made up.
he, he, he revamped, it gets worse in chapter two the real funny ones are in there.^,^ this is a A.U; because I don't kill Sephy poo(And Vincent and Yuffie are a couple -,o)
L.K. Synthesis
P.S. sorry if I misspelled anything I'll be sure to find a spell check (I'm a Country Hick ok I was born around jets but in Austin Texas. or at lest that's what the humans think. -. o I'm over 1,000 years old what do you think, You humans are strange I had to double space just to make everything look right. Oh well some of you make since.)
^*^*^*^
Ch1: And so it begins....
"And why are you bothering us again?" Asked Vincent to a very amused Cloud. They had defeated Sephiroth, well sort of, he was still alive, and they resurrected Aries and Zack.(on top of all the troubles they already had)
"Because you," Cloud points to Vincent "need to get a life. And I thought it would be inserting to give you a chance to get rid of all of us except her, " Cloud points to Yuffie who appears to only be inserted in getting Vincent to kick Clouds ass out so she could seduce her vampire (if you don't know me thin let me explain I always pair Vincent and Yuffie. ^, ^ Ask the lill-moonba) " for the rest of the week, that means for four days. You and 'the brat' all alone..."
Vincent paused for a monument to think, " ok how about we play the One Liner Game." Vincent grinned evilly making Yuffie shiver.
"Hay!" she finally spoke up "Vinnie, what's with the devil grin."
"No one has ever beaten me at the One Liner Game before!" He whispered into her ear nipping on it as well. (He's got fangs and I can prove it) Yuffie had the devil grin on now.
^*^*^*^
After everyone had been assembled for the game, of curse Sephiroth Zack and Cloud made a couple bets. Like how long can Vincent and Yuffie go without getting into a make out session, thin Tifa reminded cloud of his little habit of intruding on her 'bath time', and he was quiet.
"Ok Vin, how is this game played?" Asked Tifa wanting him to win so Cloud would have to eat his words. ^, ^
"Its easy..." he started, "each of us takes turns saying the one liners we know, heard and some you could have made up, who ever has the most wins, none can be repeated twice. Why don't you go first Tifa?"
"Ok lets see...He who laughs last thinks slowest!
*Every one snickers, but Cloud that was dumbfounded. * (its a pause to let everyone stop laughing)
The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
*Cloud was still dumbfounded but started to snicker, when everyone was laughing. *
90% of all statistics are made up.
*More laughter.*
A diplomat thinks twice before saying nothing.
*Aries tried not to snort (ok I hate Aries she's a snob look at what she says in the game.)*
Alone: in bad company. (If that's a grammar error I'm a dolphin, I copped these from a list my friend gave me)
*Some people were rowing on the floor *
As I said before I never repeat myself.
*Now everyone was on the floor, including Vincent who didn't expect Tifa to know 'that one.'(If you haven't realized by now this is to emphasize the pause.)*
Do steamrollers really roll steam?
*Cloud stopped laughing to stair at Tifa who returned a death stair and a cow dies in background (its an anime joke me n' my friend made up)*
And the last one witch I saw on a bumper sticker... I hate to repeat gossip, so I will only say this once, now Cloud it's your turn."
*Everyone looks at cloud*
"Om." said cloud, "Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
*Tifa kisses cloud while everyone laughs and awww's (don't look at me I don't know what ambiguity is)*
Lottery: a tax on people who are bad at math.
*Just make this one up*
Puritanism: the haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy.
*Sephiroth tries not to look guilty as the others laugh."
When there's a will, I want to be in it.
*Everyone looks at cloud in amusement, no one expected him to make it this far.*
All generalizations are false, including this one.
*Now people are laughing again*
You can't have everything, where would you put it?
*Everyone snickers saying, as it isn't that funny. *
A day not wasted is a day wasted!
*Everyone: ? *
Floggings will continue until morale improves
*Vincent shakes his head and pays more attention to the ninja in his lap. (Reference to the fact that I'm a yuffintine fan)*
Death is the answer to the question 'Why?' 502 Do fish get thirsty?
*everyone laughs but Aries who knew the answer to that one. *
I feel like a fugitive from the law of averages...that's my last one your turn Zack"
"Me...
I use to have a handle on life, thin it broke.
*Everyone laughs cause that would be the truth. *
I want to die peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandfather, not screaming, terrified, like his passengers.
*Some snicker some make faces. *
I'm as confused as a baby in a topless bar
*Baret falls over laughing (along with the other perverts in the group) everyone else just looks baffled *
Friendship is one soil in two bodies.... Its your turn Sephy."
Sephiroth looked up," Why are you involving me in this? Oh well if it will get you to shut the hell up.
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing!
*The others were laughing and rolling on the floor *
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
*Everyone was trying not to laugh too hard. *
I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minuet of it.
*Laughter. again. *
Criminal lawyer is a redundancy.
*By now you probably know what's happening *
It's not the fall that kills you. It's the sudden stop at the end.
*Gee if I were there I would be in hysterics that one matches him really good this is what the others are thinking 'if he knows so many of these why doesn't he start a stand up routine and be marry.' *
A conscience does not prevent sin. It only prevents you from enjoying it.
*Snickering. *
A friend in need is a pest indeed.
*The laughing could be heard from outside, and people were wondering what was so funny. *
All I want is a warm bed, a kind world, and unlimited power.
*Everyone was laughing so hard saying as they were expecting that one. *
An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
*Everyone was laughing but Vincent who knew what he was talking about. *
As long as I can remember, I've had amnesia.
*That's all it took to get Vincent laughing again. *
Efficiency takes time! Frugality: who can afford it?
*I didn't find this one funny but they got it pretty good. *
Forgive your enemies. but REMEMBER THEIR NAMES!
*Sephiroth had to prevent himself from snickering the others were laughing so hard. *
Help stamp out mental illness, or I'll kill you!
*Sweet drops. *
The world's one giant freak show, and I'm the star.
*Everyone was laughing again. *
If your feeling down, beet a Wall-Mart greeter half to death with a led pipe, this would do nothing to solve the problem however it is quite fun.
*The others were thinking he made all these up to force them to be quiet. *
Fortunately I'm not the smartest person you will meet I'm the dumbest. Ok cid lets see how many you know."
Cid looked at every one " Hard work has future pay off, laziness pays off now. And I bet you I could stop Gambling. Ok Brat it's your turn.
*Everyone looks shocked. *
"Well," Yuffie said. "Few women admit their age, few men act theirs.
*Aries and Tifa were laughing. *
Every time I built a character, I've regretted it. If the shoe fits buy it.
*Hyistiricel laughter broke out. *
A dirty book is rarely dusty. a mind is a terrible thing to Grawd. I forgot
*Even more laughter. *
Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain. And most do. Bugs are suns of glitches!
*Vincent grabbed Yuffie's slim waist, (she had been sitting in his lap the hole time. told you I was a yuffintine fan *
Confusion not only reigns, it pours. everyone is enlightened to my opinion.
*People were laughing so hard their sides hurt. *
Grow your own dope. plant a man.*she added in a wispier* not mine thou.
*Everyone was laughing mainly at Vincent. *
Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional. ok, Vinney dearest. make Cloud eat his words."
Everyone was snickering but Cloud who was willing to bet that, by the grin on his face that all of them didn't come close to beating him at this game.. Vincent without leaving time for the others to register what he was saying before it was too late started to list the one-liners they hadn't yet said.
"We are born naked, wet and hungry. These things get worse. Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive. Better to under stand a little thin to misunderstand a lot. Okay, who put a 'stop payment' on my reality check?
*The others were laughing so hard that Vincent had to stop so they could calm down. *
Change is inevitable except from a vending machine. A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject. Have you ever dated somebody because you were too lazy to commit suicide?
*If your not laughing your head off or at lest getting your parents/ people looking at you weird. I'm gona have to poke you with a stick. *
'Tis better to be thought a fool, thin open your mouth and remove all doubt. A chicken is an eggs way of reproducing more eggs. A friend: someone who likes you even after they know you. A waste is a terrible thing to mind. Always remember no matter where you go, there you are.
*Already Vincent was listing and coming close to the max and showed no signs of stopping any time soon it was well possible that he had gone over the max. *
Ambition is the last refuge to the failure. Angels can fly because they take themselves so lightly. Bigamy: one wife too many. Monogamy: same thing. Borderline psychotic with hermit-like tendencies.
*Everyone looked at Cid and laughed. *
Chose heaven for climate, hell for society. Constant change is here to stay. Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system. Everyone hates me because I'm paranoid.
*Yuffie snickered and flung her arms around Vincent's neck and gave him a peck on the cheek. *
Everyone is gifted, some open the package sooner. Friends come and go, enemies accumulate. Give your child mental blocks for Christmas. Gravity doesn't exist, the earth sucks.
*S. D. Scythe was laughing his head off when he heard that one. *
Gun control is being able to hit your target. How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand! How much deeper would the ocean be with out sponges? I still miss my ex-wife. BUT my aim is improving.
*Yuffie was imaging Vincent trying to shoot a Lucy look-alike with the death penalty. *
I can resist anything but temptation. If a schizophrenic threatens to commit suicide is it considered a hostage situation? Before you criticize someone walk a mile in his or her shoes, that way when you criticize them you're a mile away and you have their shoes. *Vincent has a big grin on his face. * I win GET LOST!"
Every one got up to leave but a pair of strong arms stopped Yuffie. When the others were heading down to casta de la soil Vincent whispered in her ear "Not you, I have a different kind of torment in store for you." Yuffie was 'turned on' to see the devil grin had found its way onto Vincent's face once more. While the others were at the beach the happy couple was going to make Cloud's return a living hell.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
a/n ma hahahaha. it ends there hehehe. you figure out what will happen from here. don't for get to review oh btw there are more games to come
Ha I said cum!