Awakening trust

So here comes the usual disclaimer/comments. lol

1- I own nothing, Everyone named in the story are the property of Square-enix, but i might have a Vincent plushie soon!!!

2- I am french, a.k.a MY ENGLISH SUCKS I KNOW IT DONT COMPLAIN!!!! ~ahem~ XD thank you lol

3- I need to get out of the house a little more... really..

4- Vincent-Cid .. i am obsessed!!! I so got to try another couple (AND NOT A WOMAN! (unless its me XD) ) But please... tell me i am not rushing the sex scene again.. i swear i am making them flash bang each other O_o .... My ex has really left me some mental scars.. he must have had a rabbit in his ancestors. >_<

5- .... i shut up.. go read

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"So you say that you found him in a coffin?"

A coffin, no but for what kind of fool are they taking me? No human could ever want to be in those things on purpose. Now I know Vincent can somewhat be weird, but to imagine him in a coffin?!

"yes, exactly"

"He didn't want to join at first, but once we were about to leave the basement, he ran after us and joined."

What the hell? So it's really true? ok, of course, I learned many things ever since I joined this group. First of all, a talking dog.. or wolf, or maybe even lion. Whatever he is. Never I would have though such things existed, but they do. So here I am talking with it and a ninja girl about another member of the group. Being the last one to join a party isn't always evident and you have a lot of peoples to learn about. For many, they are easy to understand. Barret is someone who can easily explodes but has dedicated everything to his daughter Marlene, Tifa is the perfect friend you can have even if she is somewhat as sticky to someone as glue, Cloud is a confused mess of mossyness and God knows I hate this phrase. Yuffie would put an hyperactive sugared and caffeinated child to shame, cait the doll is.. errrr. a doll so what else can I get from it? Aside that he started his life in this team with a double crossing. Nanaki is .. that talking dog or whatever , but wise beyond his years, we had Aeris, poor woman who got killed by the one we are chasing after like a cat chase a mouse, and of course, we have Vincent .. the one I cant understand his story for shit.

Not that I am not trying, by far he is the one that just cannot let anyone through his wall. And hearing about him right now might help me pierce it. At least, I hope. He is probably the one closest to my age and I don't really want to be seen hanging around with minor girls. Jail isn't my favorite place to spend vacation in...

So from what I can gather of his it, he is a love sick person who went on a jealous rage and got shot then experimented on to be locked in a coffin and woke up from it 30 years later.

And I thought my last horror movie was scary.... This story is to send shivers down the spine of any man.

Yuffie swallowed another bite of her oversized hamburger. How those things can be huge in the dinning area of the Gold saucer.

"He is only thinking about her. When he joined us he probably thought he would meet her again."

"Which he also did Yuffie, but she was not... what he wanted to see. It pretty much made him clam up a whole lot more."

Yeah, I remember those few days after we were back from the submarine run. We found a cave and Vincent was in the leading party with Nanaki and Cloud. I heard they saw his girl in there but haven't heard more.

"what hapenned in there anyways?"

"Well you know Lucrecia was in there, but she was like a ghost. I don't really know how come we all saw her but we did. Anyways, Vincent and her talked for a moment and she asked him about Sephiroth, saying she never had the chance to hold her child. She asked Vincent if he was alive, like she felt he was and like she saw in her dreams, and Vincent told her that he was dead."

"So he lied to her?"

"Yes, after that it's all foggy. The only thing I remember is light, the whole place got so bright that we had no choice but to take cover. After that she was gone, dissapeared without a trace."

"geeez, what the hell was that all about?"

This story was getting weirder and weirder and making me dizzy, so I might as well just give it up for today and go change my mind.

"Bah, I'm just gonna go walk around and see what I can do.Thanks for the heads up about him."

"You're welcome old man"

Old man.... I felt the urge to shove that hamburger of hers down her throat but she is too young and as I previously said, I don't want to get into trouble. I said good bye to both of them and walked away.

So let's recap for a bit. We are 8 peoples in the party, aside the few crew that I have aboard the highwind. 2 women, 4 men, one "dog" and one toy. Not like I don't have a lot of peoples to talk to and get closed to, but no! I had to chose the hardest one of the bunch. Don't ask me why ok? I am not even sure you'd understand the reasons. I don't even understand it either. I mean, I am not gay ok? Let's get that thing straight, I love boobs. But there is something about this man that I just cannot put my finger on and that makes me want to get dangerously close to him.

That is... if I can even start being his friend.

He did show some openning when I was leader of the party, but after that submarine run, it all went away.

Gods women can be such a pain.. Shera and Lucrecia aren't exceptions. Well at least I know that Shera was right about the oxygen tanks in the rocket and if it wasn't of her, I'd probably be floating in a zillion pieces in space. But somehow, that cannot make me love her either. I can be so messed up... Cloud must be rubbing off on me.

And on the other hand, we have Vincent who starts to get better and maybe even enjoy life, he starts cracking some weird jokes and bam! He sees a chick and all his improvements goes to the dumpster.

Talk about a downer...

Grumbling, I watch at where I am now. Without even realising it, I ended in wonder square watching Cloud and Tifa challenge each other on the snowboarding game while Barret is playing some weird machine about a moogle in heat. And from the look of it, it's not working the way he wants. He is probably about to tear that machine off the wall.

Cait is probably at the chocobo racing area. Compulsive player and gambler. It's bad, I swear. I am affraid to see who hides behind him.

And once again, my thoughts drifts to Vincent. Where can he be? I don't imagine him anywhere where there is a lot of light and fun. Sad, but I think he is probably hiding and gloomy in his hotel room. Maybe I should go join him?

hmm.. to talk about what? Scratching the back of my head, I figure that he probably still wants to be left alone. He is retreated from everyone when on the ship, he stands in the backrow when in teams, when sharing room he will be in his corner either reading or gazing through the window. It's probably easier to start a conversation with a phone book.

Ah, and to hell with it! I'll see him later, tonight is suposed to be a night where we get everything off our mind before going to Cosmo canyon to drop the huge materias. I might as well go have some fun before heading to my room. Well fun.. I'll just go for a ride around the place.

So with a new goal in mind, I head for the Gondola. Since I like being in the air, I might as well put this love to good use and see what this place has to offer. I haven't been here very often and it's rare that I am in peace too, without anyone either bouncing around me or asking me existential questions.

So arrived at the gondola, I learn that we have to be 2 in order to ride it.

"What are you talking about? I am with no one right now and I got to drag my ass all the way to my friends and call them so they can come with me so I ain't with a stranger?!"

"I am sorry Sir, it is the rule. I cannot change it. There is already someone who is alone, maybe you can go with him?"

"And it's a dude to add up to it. Bah.. to hell with it, fine I'll go."

Hey, I wanted a ride and it appears that the only way that I'll ever get one NOW is with a stranger, so might just as well deal with it and make sure he stays on his freaking side of the seat. I pay up for my part, which at least gave me a discount since prices are doubled or whatever, they are counted for 2, and get in.

"Seems like I'll ride with yo- ... Vincent?!"

What the $%&*% ?! Vincent in the gondola?! Of all the strangers to fall on to, I fell on the only one I knew. Well, at least it won't be with some weird dude and I won't need to hold my fist closed ready to punch him in the face if he moves an inch too close.

....Between you and I.. I might even enjoy it if he did move closer.

Ah ok ok !!! I shut up about this.

"Hi Cid, I hope you don't mind."

"Not at all Vincent, it's better that it's you than some weirdo."

I sat down, while the person in charge closed the door. Each of us were sitting at our end of the gondola while it left the station.

At first, neither of us dared uttering any word. Like if a spell of silence hit the gondola. Shifting unconfortably under this, I decided to start, or at least, TRY to start a conversation.

"So what brings you here? I thought you would have stayed at the hotel."

"...."

.... I did say that I would TRY to start a conversation? Instead of replying, he turned his head around, looking outside. I could swear there was some sort of sadness in his eyes. Then again, he always seems like he is sad, deep in thoughts. Before I could think, words escaped.

"You ok?"

What a weird thing to ask... Isn't is OBVIOUS that he IS NOT ok?! Sometimes I can really ask stupid questions...

But surprisingly, it seems as though this question stroke some string as he turns his head toward me. His staring eyes are like X-rays. I swear he can see everything in me and through me. I am not the kind of man to shake in my boots, but under this stare, I would like to vanish.

"ok, that was a stupid question to ask."

"Though you are the only one who ever asked it."

He talks ?!?!? No wait a minute, did my ears just deceived me? Am I already becomming senile?! I did see his lips move and I did hear something, so it can't be 2 hallucinations at the same time.

He must have read my surprise on my face because he turned around again to look outside.

"I didn't know... sorry to be so nosy"

"..You aren't. I just wanted some time to sort everything out."

"You've been awfully silent for a while now. Ever since we are back from the sub. What hapenned?"

" I thought Yuffie and Nanaki filled you in."

How does he know? It's not the first time he pulls one like that... I know he can read on lips, probably from his training with the Turks. So he probably saw us talk and he "read" it. I swear those Turks can do everything...

"But they aren't YOU. They can say whatever they want but never it will be the same as what you have to say about this and what you felt about it as well."

"Why are you interrested?"

" .... "

Vincent 1 , me 0 .. I hate getting blocked like that. Well, I am not really blocked..

" ... because we are friends, no?"

" .... "

Vincent 1, me 1? It's true that not talking is his favorite reply... not evident to know what he thinks about in those times..

"You consider me your friend?"

"What?! %$*&%, Vincent what are you talking about? Of course I do. Why shouldn't I?"

" .... Because I'll probably fail you."

"Fail me?"

There was something in this phrase that I didn't like and somehow, I felt it was drawing it's source 30 years ago. Maybe it was better that I didn't ask. I learned with time that it was useless to force him to tell you something, that sooner or later, he would open up by himself. He chose not to reply to me. Sometimes it can really anger me, but tonight, something felt different. Something in his eyes that I just couldn't understand, but at the same time, was worrying me. He just wasn't in his usual state of mind. Openned while being a million miles away.

He turned around again, looking outside. I got up to sit beside him and laid my hand on his shoulder. I'll give it a shot, the worse thing he can do is not respond. So it won't be a huge change.

"Vincent?"

I felt him tense underneath my touch and he slowly turned around, head low.

"...What's wrong? You can tell me you know."

"I know Cid, but right now, things are extremely clouded in my mind. Ever since I met up with Lucrecia, it's been like that."

"I know, it's like if all the improvements that you did just went away in the blink of an eye. I don't know what you talked about you and her, but... but it's in the past Vincent, you shouldn't just look toward it while disregarding the path in front of you."

" .... "

"I may never know what it feels like to be in your boots, but I know what it feel like to watch a friend clawing and destroying his mind for yesterdays. You are not alone Vincent, if this is what is in your mind."

"Everyone I've known...Cid, it's been so long that they aren't even aware that I am alive, they won't even believe it. I haven't... changed, haven't aged. Sometimes, the only thing I wish I could do is go back in time and change everything."

"It's the weight of every human being Vincent, there will always be something that someone will want to change. But the past is only there to learn from it. And if you ever need it, I am there to help you."

Gods I suck in talking like that... I am nowhere near being a philosopher, but somehow, I felt those words were getting to him. Hell, if the lighting wasn't so weird I would swear I saw a smile somehow creep it's way on his lips.

I squezed his shoulder a bit, still trying to cheer him up and show him he wasn't alone. Hell, I would have probably hugged him if I wasn't so worried about making him clam up when he was barely starting to open up.

"So go on Vincent, blare it all out. It's not like anyone else will hear you aside me. And what is said here remains here. So you can just say whatever is on your mind, about anything."

"If only I knew where to start..."

"You can always start from the beginning? Every story has a beginning."

He looked up to stare at me for a moment. I don't know what he was looking for in my eyes but it seemed as though he found it when he sighed and sat straight up, his back on the side of the gondola.

Faintly nodding, he explained his story to me. Even if I heard a lot about it, from the parts he'd relinquish of it from times to times, it never really made more sense than now. And for a moment, I could say that I was.. honored that he openned up to me.

He kept on telling me his story, from his time in the Turks, when he went to Nibelheim until the moment he got shot by Hojo. After this, he skipped to when Cloud awaken him and somehow, I knew there was more to his story: that part when he had to face Hojo's madness, when he went from what he was, to who he is now.

But I dare not to ask. If he skips it, it's probably because there is a reason. It's probably what plagues him with constant nightmares, as soon as he drifts to sleep. But in this story, I understood something simple. As complex as he seems to be, his needs are simple: He just needs someone to be there. Oh! he didn't say it out loud, but I felt it in between the lines.

The gondola reached it's destination, and the door openned. I felt that this moment we just passed broke a barrier in between both of us down. Patting his back with my hand I invited him for a walk, which he accepted.

As we walked, I came into another realisation. It's strange how peoples can be mean sometimes, without even knowing. They kept on staring at us walking and sometimes, someone pointed us. Vincent partially hid his face and his left arm in the confines of his cape. I tried to remember if this usually hapenned when we were walking around, unable to decypher if it was because of him, or because we were a group of heavily armed peoples. I found myself swearing at their ignorance, if only they knew him they'd know what they are missing... and how this can embarass him. After a moment, we went back to the hotel. The gold saucer seems to never close but we needed to rest, or at least, go somewhere where Vincent would feel more at ease. We climbed the stairs toward our rooms and I once again swore, thinking of how the peoples were.

" $%&%$ jerks..."

I openned the door to my room, about to invite Vincent in.

"I don't blame them. I must, in a manner of speaking, scare them"

"You kidding me?! How can you scare anyone? You are as cute as everyone else an- .."

Vincent froze, stopping dead in his track and I jerked around, realising what I just said. Both our glance met and locked one in the other for a second that seemed an eternity, embarassement meeting with disbelief.

"...You..wh-what..?!"

It's not often that I see him unable to form words (when he speaks) and for a moment, I was scared that everything we built tonight would collapse, but his eyes spoke faster than himself and I read in them that I stroke another sensitive string. I grabbed his hand and pulled him in my room and before he had time to react, I closed the door. His gaze didn't leave me, not even for a second, thorn between confusion of what I was doing and disbelief of what he heard me say. I thought of his story for a moment again, and guessed it had been ages since he heard anything positive directed to him. And from what I heard of Hojo, he wasn't the one to compliment anyone, even those he somehow liked. Last thing Vincent must have been through in his past life must have been hell. After that came his 30 year long slumber, filled of nightmares and remorse.

I looked at him, a little unsure and moved away a strand of hair from his face. He didn't move back, didn't react at all. It's like if this last phrase I told him, this last action I did, drained everything from him. I get closer, still no reaction.

But his stare is constant, changing as I get closer. Could it be....?

With the same hand I used to remove his hair from his face, I use it to gently caress his cheek and I feel him faintly shudder. Should I? Shouldn't I? He must read my questionning in my eyes, I am sure it's apparent. After a few minutes, I decide to go forward. I approach my face and lay my lips on his's.

The reaction is immediate, first he crisps, but then, with a soft wimper, he calms and responds, slightly openning his mouth, allowing me entrance.

My hand leaves his cheek and goes in his hair while I gently push him against the wall tasting this, until now, forbidden flavor I longed for. I feel his hands creep up my back, strongly holding me closer to him and his own tongue reaches deeper within my mouth. His responding is beyond what I imagined. I press my body against his's, caressing his hip and thigh and faintly grinding on his groin. I feel him get weaker and barely able to hold himself up so without parting, we make our way to the bed where he basically tackles me down to after my jacket was discarded. Who am I to complain? I undo the buckles of his cape and push it away, along with his shoulder pads. He seems even more slender without them, almost breakeable. With his left arm behind my back, holding me close to him, he caresses my face with his right hand, while mines travels around from his back to his behind. He straddles my hips and I feel him sit on my mid section. I break the kiss in a gasp, surprised at his attitude. But I ain't one to go down without a fight and two can play this game. Flipping him on his back, leaving his legs on each sides of me, I reach for his neck with my mouth, which I ravage with kisses and soft bites, my right hand caressing his chest over his shirt. I hear his breathing comming out in a strangled moan as his right hand claws at my back, his left one fisting on the blanket.

Slowly, I unbutton his shirt and cover with kisses every inch of skin that I reveal. Once completly open, I remove it enough so I can see his entire chest. In the faint lighting of the room, it almost went unnoticed, but I was close enough to see them... long pale marks covering his otherwise flawless skin. So many that I dare not to count. It's at this moment that I fully understood why he skipped Hojo's part in the gondola.

Delicatly, as if not to hurt him, I pass my fingers on them. These mark alone tell me more about him than anything else, they tell me of his strenght, what makes him able to live with any remains of sanity, and they tell me of his weakness, because after all, he is only human. Lowering my head toward him again, I trace them with kisses, starting near his neck and ending on his navel, on which I softly bite. His scent is addicting, I only desire more and more of it. I feel him arc his back to my touch and I make my way up to one of his nipple, onto which I nibble.

I hear him mewl, such sound I desired to hear since so long now. I feel his hands going after my shirt and I help him remove it right before finishing removing his's. Taking a grip of on of his leg, I push myself up to grind once more on him. This single action sends jolts down my spine and I hear him catch his breath. His good hand reaches out for my shoulder on which he strongly pulls so we meet in another kiss. He is so unpredictable, at a moment, calm as a lamb, at another, hungry as a wolf.

Breaking the kiss, he slides under me, kissing and biting my neck and upper chest. My arms almost gives in from pleasure.

"Gods, Vincent.."

He flips me over and gets on top of me, in the same position I previously was in. I could scream for him to take me so my need is high. Dipping his face in the confines of my neck, he keeps on with his ravaging while toying with my nipple with his right hand. I groan, holding his head closer to me and tangling my finger in his hair. I feel him between my legs and I can barely imagine how it will be in a moment. Throwing my left hand down, I grab him by his massive belt and pull his hips closer, trying to unbuckle it with one hand. Letting go of my nipple, he reaches down to assist me until we slowly slide his pants down, mines meeting the same fate quickly after.

He lowers himself on me and in a mix of moans and groanings, our cocks meets and neither of us can resist grinding one on the other for a moment.

Digging my hand in between both of us, I slide my fingers on his lenght, hearing his breathing strangle once again. I gently wrap my fingers around him before moving up and down, watching him meeting my mouvement with his hips while moaning. Gods.. the beauty..

Letting go of his head, I reach for the drawer and manage to find a small bottle in it. With time I learned that you just never know when things like that could come in handy, so better keep some close, just in case. I give the bottle to Vincent, hoping he gets the idea. I don't want him to spend his time in my hand, I want to feel him in me..

Looking at me, he takes the bottle and pours some liquid on his fingers.

"You.. sure?"

"Gods yes, Vincent.."

With a nod, he reaches in between my buttocks and I feel him slide a finger in. I buck up, writhing beneath his touch. After a minute he slides another finger in, getting me ready. This time it is my voice which comes out strangled. Even if he cannot reach very far with his fingers the feelings of them in me drives me insane and after another moment, he withdraws them to replace them with something even bigger and warmer.

"holy...shit, Vincent.."

I hear him moan as he slowly moves in and out and I help him move in with one of my leg wrapped around him. I can feel him faintly shaking and from the look at his face, he really enjoys this.

I swear, for someone who has been in the ... "unavailable" departement for the past 30 years, he sure hasn't forgotten this tribal dance. After a few thrusts he gains speed and I let go of him, managing to hold myself high enough for him to reach deeper. It doesn't take long before I feel him come in touch with this spot, so deep in me and I violently arc up as the waves of sheer pleasure strikes my body.

"shit.."

Unable to move, as to not throw him off rythm, I grab hold of the sheets, moaning loudly at this ecstasy flooding my body and soon enough, the only downfall of being inactive for so long strikes in and Vincent joins me, his keen cry mixing with my grunting.

Panting , he lays on me and I caress his head while holding him close, my face dug in his hair.

"Man Vincent..."

We lay there for a moment and I let him catch his breath back while slidding my other hand on his back and side, hoping he wasn't too drained. After a moment, he lifts his head toward mine.

"What.. about you?"

"Only if you are up to it."

I saw his eyes flicker with confusion and something I understood as fear. Not terror, not at all but maybe more like, discomfort.

"I won't force you Vincent."

"I know.."

Reaching out behind him with his right hand, he grabbed hold of the bottle then put it in my hand.

"..and I trust you."

I sheepishly smiled.

"Are you .. new to this?"

He lowered his eyes for a moment, I felt he was unconfortable with that question. He bit his lower lips before whispering an answer.

"By will, yes..."

Once again, there was something I didn't like in the answer he gave me. Something that sounded, terrible. Did he really mean that someone ... forced himself on him? Could it really be ... no , if it was him I doubt Vincent could ever be able to take it, to even live with it..

I passed my hand on his face, not trying to search for who did this to him, though somewhere inside, I had the feeling it was.. Hojo.

"I'll go easy, if you want me to stop, tell me."

He faintly nodded and removed himself from me, laying on his back. I went over him and spreaded his legs, before pouring some lub on my fingers. Caressing his inner thigh, I slowly slide one finger in, making sure not to go too fast. He arcs backward, extremely tensed, but doesn't ask me to stop. Bending forward, using the hand that previously was caressing his leg for support, I kiss around his neck and chest to set his mind on other things, feeling releived once I hear him moan. Once I feel him calmed enough, I slide another finger in. The same pattern restarts: he tenses then I calm him with kisses and bites. Making sure he is ready with a few cisoring movement, I lift myself from him and faintly push him to turn around, I want to be able to hold him tightly in this. Only God knows when this will happen again and I want to make sure it's as enjoyable as possible.

Wrapping my arm around his stomach, I lower him onto my lap, sinking in him. oh! the tightness...

Hearing him catch his breath, I hold him tightly on me, hidding my face in his hair and biting his neck through this ebony curtain. Lifting and lowering him down on me a few times, I make sure he is ready before I can start. After a few gentle trusts, I push on him and he find himself on all 4, still held around the waist. He reaches for the headboard with his left hand and grabs a hold to it while I grab him by the shoulder with my other hand to pace up once I hear him moan my name. Such melody to my hears...

Caressing his lower stomach, I move in and out of him, listenning if there is any protest. I pass my fingers on his manhood, underneath it, feeling around his black curls, listenning to the soft mewling and gasps he relinquishes. While gaining speed, I lower my lips on his back, tracing his vertebra, not making any comments about the long parallelar marks on his back. So when he morphs, those wings does break through his skin...

Little by little, I reach deeper in him and at a time, I hear him gasp and almost give in under me and he faintly scream my name. Still holding him tightly on the shoulders, I caress him around on his stomach and feel his erection has reawaken. I wrap my fingers around it to give him even more pleasure and I feel his hand join mine, adding more pressure onto my hold, while begging me to go deeper and harder. It seemed as if I was about to rip him in two and he still asks me for more, which I gave.

We last a moment at this madenning pace but his screams and feeling him release in our hands soon send me over the edge and in a loud and long moan I join him, raw pleasure once again travelling through my veins.

I withdraw myself from him and he lays down, panting and constantly whisper my name. I lay partially over him and kiss him on the cheek.

"You ok?"

He nods, looking completly drained and still trying to catch his breath. I reach for my shirt on the floor and use it to wipe his hand and mine (as well as the bedsheet) before covering each other for sleep.

I grab a hold of him, holding him tightly to me. He is so warm... when I first met him, he was so pale (and still is) that I somehow thought he was as cold as a dead person. It's completly the opposite, I never felt someone as warm as he is.

Caressing his hair, I feel his breathing calm down and I kiss his forehead.

"You are beautifull Vincent..."

Somehow, I feel him smile, his face buried in my neck. I lay my head on top of his's, still holding him tight, as if I would protect him from anything.

And for the first time, that night, he didn't wake up from a nightmare.