Summons of Youth

Disclamer: All characters contained herein, with the exception of Ayila Mereel, are property of Square-enix and any other subsidarys thereof which retain rights to the Final Fantasy series. Long story short, I'm didn't kidnap Auron and the others, I just borrowed them. I'll have them back by their bedtimes, Please don't sue.


        So long.. Since the warm touch of a hand, the simple caress of someone else’s flesh…Irreplaceable sensations I haven’t felt since… since… No. I’ve gone without friends, family, consorts, without anyone for so long. Now, here, I’m legendary. And still so painfully alone. I can’t remember the last time I felt alive.


        A darkened alley. I wasn’t even sure there were still alleys here, but I found one. And much like the alleys in Zanarkand, it wasn’t empty.
Poor girl, who knows how long she was lying there, half-stripped and unconscious. Might have been raped, mugged, or whatever, but I sure as hell wasn’t going to leave her there. So, like the good little guardian I am, I scooped her up and carried her away.
I covered her as best I could with the clothes she had left, but that still wasn’t very much. Back in the hut I wrapped her up and put her in bed, minus the few shreds that had once been called ‘clothes’. She looked a lot better off now, curled in a warm blanket. I had wiped the smudges of dirt and blood off of her and treated her wounds. I was making some food for her by the time she woke up.
        I never saw someone resemble a deer so much. She sat up, almost too quickly, clutching the blanket to her chest. Her eyes were wide as she looked at me. She couldn’t even stutter out a full question.
“Relax kid, I’m not going to hurt you.” She curled around herself a little more, and despite how imposing I’m sure I looked she stopped shaking quite so much. “Hungry?”
I know it was lame, and probably not very comforting, but I held out the bowl of soup anyway. She glanced from the bowl in my hand, up to my face and back. “Go ahead.”
One slender arm reached out, trembling slightly, and took the bowl.
“What happened to you?” She didn’t seem to want to look up, she just… started eating. Her slight frame shook as she moved, nervous and unsure even in such a simple act as eating. Her eyes stayed focused on the surface of the steaming liquid as she spoke.
“I… I don’t remember.”
        That hurt. I’m not sure why that pulled so hard at my heart, but it did. I couldn’t help but scoot closer. I wanted so badly to wrap an arm around her slender shoulders, but I held back. The last thing she needed was me to scare her. She sniffled, wiping her nose on the back of her hand, then continued in on her soup.
        We sat in awkward silence for a while, giving me a chance to appreciate just how pretty she was. The pale firelight flickered across her smooth skin, deep shadows bringing out the edge of her every beautiful curve. She had remembered to clutch the blanket to her chest, but the soft arch at the small of her back lay exposed, as did her gracefully sloping shoulders. Her soft black hair cascaded down her back, and her mismatched eyes glimmered. So long…
        I nearly hit myself for the images that crossed my mind. How easy it would be to take advantage of her now, to hold those slender wrists down against the sheets and just take her. I forced myself back to mind the fire. “How do you feel?”
“I think I’m alright… I’m a little sore, but I’ll be ok.”
“Good, what’s your name kid?”
“Ayila.” The silence bit for a moment, and then. “Thank you.”
I guess I should have given a more eloquent response than a grunt, but I didn’t. She handed me her empty bowl, then lay down again.
“Get some rest, alright kid?” She nodded, and closed her eyes.


        My little charge has been far more helpful than I had imagined. As it turns out, she’s not a bad cook, an alright house-keeper, an amusing conversationalist, and when coaxed, a beautiful singer. Sadly, I was only fortunate enough to find all this out because she’s got no place else to go. She still can’t remember what happened (or, as her demeanor suggests, she refuses to tell me. She hates troubling people.) So I continue to provide her with sanctuary.
        Oh yes, did I also mention she’s a great handy-woman? Yesterday she put me to shame in front of everyone on that damn thatched roof. That piece of ^%&# leaks every time it rains… And I fix it every morning after it rains… She followed me up today and Voila, no leaks tonight. Figures.
        On the other side of that skill, I’d been sleeping on the floor for the past week. She refused to let me keep it up (Bad for my back, she says) and built a new cot. Of course, the one she made was a hundred times more comfortable than that chunk of lumber I made. I’m reluctant to give hers up.
        But it’s amazing, she’s such a sweet little thing, if still a bit skittish. It’s hard sometimes, just being next to her, there in front of the fire as we eat. I want so badly to hold her… But I’m sure she doesn’t think of me that way. I’m a guardian, and at least fifteen years her senior (Not even beginning to count my unnatural years). So I force myself to pretend to be a father figure, and cherish her from afar.

        Damn him, DAMN HIM!!
Maester Seymour seems to have taken a liking to her. He says she has the makings of an amazing summoner. She seemed so happy to hear that… But I’m sure as hell not. He’ll drag her off to trials, off to temples… Places far from here, far from me. I don’t want to let her go…


        Maester Seymour returned today, with a strange sort of test for her. It’s a weird sort of multi-colored egg. He says he’ll be back in a week to check her progress. Bastard. But she seems to enjoy it, as she smiles up at me from her spot in front of the fire. I smile back, trying not to let her see how much this prospect scares me.
Apparently, I’m not convincing.
“Auron, are you alright?”
“hmm? I’m fine Ayila.”
“You look troubled…” She crawls up beside me, her eyes wide and worried.
“I…” Damn it… My heart skips a beat as her hand rests high on my thigh. I’m too old to be reacting like this to a girl, I’m not some skittish teenager. “I’m fine.” I manage to blurt out, none too convincingly.
“Are you sure?” Her look proves she’s not convinced, but if I know her, she won’t press it.
“Yeah… you’d better get back to that test Maester Seymour gave you…” I give her a grin just encouraging enough for her to go back to the fireside. We sit in silence for a while as she fiddles with that damn egg and I just stare at the fire, sipping my sake.
“You were a famous guardian, right?” Well that came out of left field.
“Yeah.” And just like every time she surprises me, I answer before I can think through the consequences.
“If… If I become a summoner… will you be my guardian?” I can’t mistake that note of hope in her voice. I can’t think of my usual wise and all-powerful response about what would be best for her either. Damn it.
“I don’t know.” I don’t know if I could let you go, I don’t know if I could stand to be so close and never have you, I don’t know if I could trust someone else to protect something so precious… So many ends to that simple phrase. I know what the right answer should be, but my heart won’t let me give it. Tonight is just becoming to tense. I rise, ready to beat a hasty retreat to my cot, but she… suddenly there’s a pair of arms encircling me, a warm body pressed up against mine, and her head lying against my chest.
“Please.” She breathes quietly. I can feel her heart pounding in her chest.
“I will.”
        Damn me.


        That stupid little egg finally hatched, and now it’s a stupid little creature. Whatever it is, Ayila seems to be taking good care of it. It follows her everywhere, and clings to her when it sleeps. I have no idea what she’s feeding it, but it seems to be growing well enough.
        I have a bad feeling Maester Seymour will be back soon. And I have an even worse feeling I’m going to have to live up to my promise soon.


        Thank god that little midget demon is gone. Maester Seymour took it with him when he came back to check Ayila’s progress, so now it’s just the two of us in my cramped little hut again.
        But that’s not always a good thing. The little beast may have been annoying, but at least it was a deterrent. Now she sits so close I can smell her, talking or singing before the fire. She always seems to be smiling up at me. It’s heartbreaking, that smile. I never realized how much I missed it being just us, until I felt it again. I can’t help but think about it being like this forever, but I know that’s impossible. Still, I think as I sit here next to her, I wish it could always be like this. Shit.
        It’s a moment before my mind catches what my body is doing, and it’s already too late. I’m almost startled to see my own arm, wrapped around her shoulders protectively. And then she’s there. She’s nuzzled up under my arm, her head resting on my chest, and the most blissful smile I’ve ever seen gracing her lips. I can’t back away now, and I don’t really want to. She’s warm and soft, just like I’d imagined, and she just looks so peaceful. Please god, let this moment last forever.

        It lasted so much longer than it should have, I think as I carry her back into the bedroom. I do my best not to wake her as I try to maneuver her under the covers of her cot. And just when I think I’ve succeeded… Her beautiful mismatched eyes flutter open.
“Auron?” Why does she have to sound so much like an angel?
“You fell asleep.”
“Oh.”
I walk to my lonely, cold, empty cot…
“Auron?”
“Hai?”
“Thank you… For everything.”
“Of course, Love.” Leave it to me to tell the truth.


        Waiting is always the worst part. All the priests staring at me as they walk by doesn’t help either. It’s like they know my mind, and they all look at me accordingly. Like they’re disgusted with the dirty old man. Damn trials. One day I’ll have to strangle Maester Seymour. Slowly. Very slowly.
Doors opening pull me from my thoughts.
“I passed.” Her voice betrays how tired she is, even if her wide smile doesn’t. I smile for her. I hope she doesn’t notice my clenched fists. Damn it all, why do I have to love her?

        My patience is ripped. Months of this, of her, so close to me and yet untouchable. I can’t hold back any longer. I grab her by the wrists, pushing her against the cool stone wall. I see the fear in her eyes, and I can’t stand myself for causing it. But I’ve taken her lips before I can stop, trying to be gentile and I know failing. Who gives a fuck if the idiot Blitzball player doesn’t like it. Her mouth can’t fight the intrusion of my tongue, a forceful probe against her whimpers. It’s so… perfect, I can’t breathe for a moment even after I’ve released her. I step away, suddenly afraid to see the damage I’ve done.
Her smaller frame is shaking as she tries to gain her balance, using the wall as a support. Her eyes are still closed, and she takes her breath in shallow gasps. Slowly, her eyes open and her gaze rises to me. Fear, loathing, I expected something akin, but all she shows me is innocent confusion.
        And then Wakka was at her side, comforting her. I can’t help but smile as she waves him away, but he’s on me too fast.
“Bastard! You just don’t do that to a woman, ya?” He’s fuming as he throws me up against the opposite wall, looking ready to knock my head off.
“Wakka!” I hear Ayila call from behind him, but he’s not listening now.
“If you eva’ touch her like that again I swear I’ll…”
“WAKKA!” He pauses, just long enough for me to slip out from under him and back to her side. He wants my hide now, I can tell. But like everything else, the rest of the party carries on like nothing happened. At least until nightfall.

        “You gotta be kiddin’ Lulu, we can’t trust him alone with her! You saw what happened!”
        Either he doesn’t think I can hear him, or he really wants me to know what he thinks of me. Whatever the case may be, I can hear Lulu giving him every reason why she’s right and he’s a worm, and that that’s the way the room arrangements are going to be. I understand her reasons, but I hate to say I agree with him. After today, after being so close, I don’t think I can trust myself with her. Not that she seems to mind.
        Then again, she hasn’t spoken to anyone since I kissed her.

        The room is too small, the beds far too close. She’s right there… But…
“Auron?” The simple act of her speaking is enough to startle me. She’s looking right at me now, her face somber. Now it comes to it.
“Yes?” I try to ask non-chalantly from my window perch.
“Auron, please come here.” Her voice sounds on the edge of tears, something I’ve never heard before. I’m beside her in a heartbeat, even if I can’t bring myself to speak. I can’t even look at her when I feel a soft hand on my cheek. She’s moving slowly now, towards me. I turn to her, to tell her I’m sorry, I was wrong, I didn’t mean it, but her lips prevent me.
        Her kiss is soft and sweet, yet far more intense than I imagined, and it sets me off. My arms are around her in an instant, my body pinning hers against the small bed, and my tongue between her lips again. I feel a hand on my back, fingers raking through my hair. Whimpers and pleas emanate from her throat, driving me further from sanity. I grab her wrists, forcing them to the bed. I hold her there, helpless as I claim my territory, marking her neck with rough kisses and sharp bites. I hear her gasping my name as I change my grip, leaving a hand free to tear off her top and expose more delicious skin to the cool night air. She moans at each nip, squirming beneath me. I run my tongue along the curve of each of her breasts and up her neck, stealing another vicious kiss before moving onward. Her skirt proves no more protection than her top and falls apart with one swift pull.
Finally… all of her naked before me. Mine. She spreads her legs willingly. I have to fumble for a moment, shedding my clothes as quickly as I can. One thrust and I’m inside of her, in heaven. Ye gods, she’s tight. I can hear my own voice distantly, moaning incoherently as I begin pumping, answering her desperate pleas for more. She arches off the bed, frantically calling my name, her voice tearing at my heart.
        Her scream is more than my tortured body can bear. I come harder than I ever have in my life, feeling her clench tight around me as she follows. She’s still repeating my name under her breath when I collapse into her arms. My sight is gone. All I can hear for a moment is my heart beating in my ears and my name on her ragged breath. I can feel the after-tremors of climax running through both of our weak bodies, and something cold running down my face.
Oh my god, am I… crying? She smiles up at me, taking my face into her hands as she dries my tears.
“Aishiteru, Auron.”
        Wrapping my arms around her, I buried my face in her shoulder and wept like a child.

Those two simple words were all it took to break me.

        The next morning was more complicated than I could have hoped for. The second I stepped out of our bedroom door, the blitzball buffoon tried to kill me. I’m still not sure what he was yelling as he knocked me down, but it must have been pretty bad, because Ayila ran out after me in nothing but a sheet. He was about to bring a fist to my face when she yelled.
“WAKKA!!!” He hesitated for just a second, just long enough for her to do something I didn’t think she was capable of. She grabbed him by the back of the shirt and twisted, at the same time kicking him in the ribs. She must have hit something in particular, because the way he contorted forced him to hunch up then fall the way she was pulling, despite him being a good three times her size. He curled up around his stomach on the floor while she tried to help me up.