Together Alone

*Having seen Advent Children, I was compelled to write a fic of course.
Events in this fic refer to my story “Blood Dreams of Jenova,” so please
read that first if you haven’t already. WARNING: HUGE SPOILERS.
If you wanna be a good boy or girl and wait for the damn movie to come
out in English (if your American that is), then rot, cuz you’ll be waiting a
good two to three years! Lol, jk, I luv you guys ^_~*

**see profile for detailed disclaimer. All you need to know is that I don’t
own ‘em**

***yes, this is part of ‘Renosaga’ (god I still getta kick outta my buddy
calling it that…)***

Together Alone

Reno stood stubbornly outside Cloud’s door with his arms crossed.
Though he had been very rude and not very appreciative of the rescue
from the former sector 6 church, something he had said stuck.

“No. Not me. I can’t save anyone.”

How can you save the fucking planet and say that?

“You coming?” Rude asked.

“In a bit.”

“Reno, that’s the way he wants to be. Let him get his ass kicked by Kadaj
and them. We’ve got Rufus to worry about.”

“I said in a bit,” Reno repeated irritably. Rude shrugged and headed
back out into the grimy slums. He knew once Reno made up his mind there
was no changing it.

Reno waited quietly in the shadows. Just what the hell was he trying to put
together to say, anyway? Yeah, there were questions about Sephiroth’s final
battle, but actually a bigger question burned.

Did he do it to you too??

Too personal to ask in front of Rude and Cloud’s girlfriend or whatever(if that’s
what Tifa was to him now). Very inappropriate. But he had to know.

The door suddenly swung open and Reno squeezed himself back into the lee of it.
Tifa stormed out crying. “Just what the hell an I supposed to be doing while
you’re out getting Denzel, Marlene and the others back?!” she cried angrily on
her way out into the semi-lit sector 7. To cool off no doubt, and with the night
sky actually visible now that the plate was half gone, the logic couldn’t be argued.

“Tifa…” Cloud sighed from inside.

Reno snaked in and closed the door. Cloud stopped what he was
doing—bandaging his right arm—to stare suspiciously at the Turk. The
bruise-like markings gave it away. “So. You’ve got it too,” Reno guessed,
though it was more of a statement. It was hard not to recognize Geostigma.

“I’m surprised you don’t,” he retorted. “What do you want?”

Blunt motherfucker.

Reno shrugged as only he could in a carefree, sloppily worn suit gesture. “I’m
curious. Whydja turn us down?”

“I told you why.”

“I don’t think you gave us the real reason,” Reno pointed out.

“You’re still ShinRa,” Cloud said firmly.

“Oh yeah?” Reno snapped. “Then what are we doin’ at the bottom rung them?
We got money that means nothing to the economy here in Midgar—what’s
left of it anyway, a crippled president and two casualties!” Reno almost choked
on those last words, though he caught himself. Elena and Tseng… he lost
Tseng once, but twice… that had been just too much. And though Elena was
sort of a brat, the group hadn’t been the same without her. “What are we
Cloud? What are we now?! ‘Cause we ain’t no empire anymore!”

“That’s not my problem!” Cloud shouted.

“It’s not?!” Reno demanded. “You think hoarding what’s left of Jenova isn’t
going to be everybody’s problem if we can‘t figure this Geostigma crap out?!
You don’t think that’s what those freaks were looking for?!”

Cloud’s eyes sort of shifted with the name Jenova, as if he were remembering
something he’d rather not. “You… you have Jenova?” he asked quietly.

“What’s left of her,” Reno muttered. “Look, I came back to ask you one
lousy question and then I’d be out of your damned spiky hair.”

“Ask then.”

“Forget it! Ungrateful little bastard…” Reno stepped towards the door and had
his hand on the knob.

“Reno.”

He stopped and glanced over his shoulder. Cloud was looking at him with those
still glowing but now hollow eyes. He seemed exhausted. “Yeah?”

“What did you come here to say?”

“… … Sephiroth…” Reno said softly, almost inaudibly. The name hung in the room,
making shadows deeper and the air tense. As if just uttering the name made the
Planet quiver in remembrance of the deep scar that Midgar was in the face of Meteor.

A look of pained sympathy slapped Cloud right across the face. “God. He did it
to you too.”

Reno turned to look Cloud in the eyes in shock. He had been wondering the same
thing, and damn, he knew all too well what Sephiroth was capable of. The rape
had been over two years ago and it was still so fresh in his mind. That and the
agony of debate over the term “rape.”

“So… so he did it to you too…” Reno tried to say. No, no, no, don’t crack, don’t
falter here… But his Turk composure quickly crumbled under the rush of relief,
horror and downright disgust washed over him. Dammit! Anyone but Cloud!
The fact that this gave them something in common was just as unnerving as the
realization that he wasn’t alone. Reno sank to the floor and pulled at his hair to
cover his face in shame of the imminent break down. “I knew it, I fucking knew it!”

Cloud had gotten out of bed to crouch next to Reno on the floor. “Those
scars…”

“Yeah…” Reno admitted. He unbuttoned his shirt halfway to show Cloud the
long line from his stomach up to his collar bone. He touched in nostalgically.
“I … couldn’t get my revenge…”

“He did more than rape you…” Cloud wondered aloud, his hand hovering just
over where Reno had indicated.

Reno suddenly laughed. It was more of a strained, psychotic giggle, but the
word struck him as funny that second. “Rape… oh God, if it were only that
simple…!”

“What??”

Reno grabbed hold of Cloud’s collar and pulled him so their noses were an inch
away. “The fucker made me like it, Cloud!! The bastard used every ounce
of weakness I had—I was his DOLL! He was in my head! And I’ve been
stumbling through girls and guys for the past two years ‘cause of him! It’s
sick, IT’S FUCKING SICK!”

And then it all came out. Reno’s sickness spilled out in front of Cloud before
he could stop it. He was sure the tears made Cloud feel awkward but oddly
he gripped Reno close and let him stammer out meaningless and painful
confessions.

“I’m so fucking dirty… God when they dug up Rufus out of the rubble I was so
sick inside. I was ashamed of what I did to him! I gotta look at him every
day now—wasting away!! And… and Tseng!! Out of nowhere, man, NOWHERE!
I swore up and down he was dead! I made a fool outta myself, I wanted
him to STAY dead, and now he’s gone again! I dunno what the hell is
going on! I don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing or where I’m
supposed to be going… FUCK I hate telling you this!!” Reno wiped his tears
angrily, furious with himself for showing Cloud his weaknesses. “Why you?!
Why does it always have to be YOU, Cloud?! That’s all Sephiroth would talk
about last I saw him! I was JEALOUS! Can you believe that shit?! JEALOUS!!!
God, I fucking HATE you!!”

“Reno,” Cloud interrupted quietly. His voice calmed Reno and he felt a blush
hit his ears. He made a fool out of himself when Tseng came back?? Look
at me now, fucker! THIS is rock bottom! Crying like a baby in the arms of
the man two years ago he was getting paid to kill. Now he was getting paid to
recruit the bastard. Losing it is still losing it though, no matter what you get
paid to do.

“I know; shut up you piece a shit… I know! I’m pathetic!” Reno mumbled into
the cotton zip-up that Cloud was wearing.

“Then… we’re not so different now, are we?”

Cloud’s words made Reno’s hear skip a beat. One in the same. Yes, it was
close enough. Granted, Cloud had a much deeper connection being Sephiroth’s
“clone,” and his experience was surely much different than Reno’s, but they
shared a single wound together and that gave Reno the chills. Pathetic? Yes.
Both of them were. Horribly pathetic. Cloud proved it with a kiss to
Reno’s almost feverish forehead, affirmed by his acceptance of it.

Being helpless was not one of Reno’s strong suits. He was not only humiliated
by the idiot he made himself out to be (when he wasn’t even drunk!), but
angry at Cloud for stealing away his revenge and turning him on like a dirty
manwhore. His soul was dirty, that’s all there was too it, because it was only
natural for him to try and turn the tables with a sharp and hard kiss on the
mouth. It seemed Cloud was even expecting it; he didn’t flinch at all when
their tongues intermingled.

Reno was ruthless in his pursuit now, not caring if the man were friend or
foe; weak or strong; right or wrong. Strangers… acquaintances… it didn’t
matter. He’d never had someone like Cloud—so like himself and yet so
polarly opposite—and he was hungry for the experience. He almost felt the
need to prove himself now, having nearly had a nervous breakdown in
front of the guy.

Cloud had no intentions of letting Reno prove his masculinity to him. His
strength came as a surprise to Reno. True, he’d nearly had his ass kicked
by him before, but he’d never been close enough to breathe in his specific
scent of musk and sweat with a faint whiff of Mako. It had never been
intimate before (and most certainly understandably so). Reno wanted to
kill him and fuck him and worship him for understanding all at once. There
was a brief struggle for dominance with a sharp instinctive resistance on
Reno’s part, but he gave, letting Cloud pin him against the door, open all
his buttons (the ones that weren’t already there) and explore his scars with
a strange sort of fevered awe of the fingers, lips and teeth. He felt the need
to hurt suddenly, the masochistic tick that kept him going flaring up with his
cock. He wished Cloud had nails to dig into his skin. He’d make such a pretty
girl it was scary.

Cloud surprised Reno with the sudden devouring of his half-erection, which
quickly solidified with sick sort of revelry. Cloud struck Reno as the “right
now” type, but there he was, squeezing every ounce of pleasure he could
out of his rival’s hot hard dick. Not an expert, but no amateur.

“Fuck…” Reno cursed by instinct. He regretted it; this wasn’t his typical lay
and it deserved a little more respect, malicious or not. Cloud either took
no notice or didn’t care if he did. Clever guy—he knew just where to slither
his tongue about to give Reno shivers. Up, over and under, then down
the shaft and back up, causing an involuntary spasm that started at the
base of the spine and shivered its way up. Fuck, fuck! he was
right in that spot that made him wind his fingers into that wild blond hair
and pull as hard as he could. Jesus, he was right on that fucking spot
and his nerve endings wildly told him how good it felt and… and he was
going to explode from it, he just knew it!

“Ugh… oh God, fuck! FUCK!” Reno cried, shoving his cock as far back into
Cloud’s pretty mouth as he could and shooting off in the powerful thrall
of orgasm. Cloud’s hands were gripping as hard as they could on Reno’s
leg and shoulder, holding him back for some reason. He didn’t even realize
it hurt until Cloud removed his mouth and gave him the strangest look. It
was as if he was expecting some reason as to why in the world a simple
unasked question could lead so something so erotically stupid.

“Don’t look at me like that…” Reno told him breathlessly. Cloud’s eyes seemed
to inquire. “I don’t know. I don’t fucking know. What do you want, Cloud? It’s
not easy being someone’s bitch, and you know it.”

It was a strange string of words that made no sense to Reno as they tumbled
blindly out his lips. Cloud accepted them carefully and thoughtfully, never
quite breaking eye contact, though Reno instantly felt like curling up in a ball
and disappearing. He did nothing of the sort of course. No, he wasn’t fool
enough to show weakness twice.

Cloud released Reno from his iron grip and went to the window, parting the
blinds to see the slums from his second story kingdom those ridiculous
deliveries had bought him. Reno felt the bruises as he shifted to pull his
loosed clothing together and savored them. No, Cloud wasn’t worth a scar,
but these wounds would be sweet for a little while anyway.

“You have to go,” Cloud said suddenly and quietly. Tifa, no doubt, finding
her way back after her frustrations had been exhausted. “Next time—,”

“No,” Reno said to his back. “No next time. Pity.”

By the time Cloud had turned around to say something the door was swinging
slightly on it’s hinges and Reno was gone, already halfway to the old ShinRa
building where Rude was waiting with Rufus. He found himself wondering why
he kept doing this to himself. He got his answer …and it did give him a little
relief to know that Sephiroth hadn’t just jumped him.

It was a sexy image, something he sort of wanted to do to Cloud himself.
What lengths did Sephiroth go to for that finely chiseled ass? Is that how
Cloud learned, sucking Sephiroth off at a breakneck pace, hating it and
strangely loving it at the same time? Was it dirty, filthy and unclean, like
Reno’s encounter?

Disturbingly both a brain tickler and a turn on. He had scratched the very
surface of Cloud (even though Reno had done most of the talking), and
even that was too far. Complex, deep and so very alone. He was a hollow
man with all those burdens. There was something about himself that gave
him a shudder, and that was the eerie similarity between them.

Well. He wasn’t so alone now. And neither was Reno.

End
***************************************************************
*I was a little reluctant to write in Reno opening up to Cloud of all people, but
I felt the need to express that he’s got some issues to work out (as if you
couldn’t guess from my other fics about him!), and an awkward and unexpected
situation is just my style I guess. (Would Reno really open up to someone he
saw regularly? I kinda doubt it…) Seeing Reno as the comic relief in FF:AC gave
me a sense of slight disappointment (but of course it’s okay cuz the movie kicked
ass in general); I had to write him as the intense but (accurately depicted) carefree
sorta guy. Rude was much more talkative that I had imagined, so I wrote him
as such, which was kinda weird. Either way, I had fun pairing Cloud with someone
who didn’t treat him like a bitch ^.^*