Memories Are Nice

Looking back, she wasn't sure when it all started. All she knew was that she didn't want this, whatever it was, to end. Rikku sent a glance in his direction. He was unrolling his sleeping mat onto the floor of the forest. They were hiding; all of Yevon was out to get them. She heard a branch snap and turned to see Yuna and Tidus coming back to camp. They were holding hands. She smiled. She wished he would feel that way about her.

As she lay down on her mat, she sighed. She was just some kid to him, she didn't matter at all and that killed her inside. She turned and glanced at Auron. There is just something about him that draws her in. Maybe it's because he's something I can't have? Or maybe it's just these teenage hormones! UGH. I just wish I knew. Age didn't matter to her; she just wanted to be close to him. Maybe if she acted more like Lulu, Auron would notice her. That's it! She decided. I'll act more like Lulu. Maybe if I'm more level-headed like her, he'll notice me. Auron was just so, ugh. She was head over heels for him, yet she didn't even know if he realized she existed. She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep. Little did she know, a certain man was thinking of her too.

Rikku awoke the next morning and decided she needed a bath. She made her way down to the river, but noticed someone was already in the water. And that someone was Auron. Being the sneaky little thief she was, decided she would spy on him. She hid herself behind the bushes and watched him. His body was beautiful. He was full of muscle, but not too much. He had a large scar running from his shoulder down across his stomach to his hip. She wished she could trace her fingers along it, learning every inch of his skin. She was so focused on Auron she didn't hear Tidus sneaking up behind her.

"Peeking are we? That's not very nice Rikku." He teased her. Rikku whipped around, her little cheeks red from being caught. "Shhh, I don't want him to hear." Rikku grabbed Tidus' hand and pulled him away. As soon as they were out of hearing, she turned on him, "What's the matter with you! He could have seen us!" Tidus' jaw dropped. "Seriously, Rikku, what's the matter with you! He's so old." She punched him in the arm, "Don't say that! I can do whatever I please. Back off." "Rikku, what would your father say. Never mind that, he's old enough to be your father." "Tidus, you just don't understand. Please just leave me alone."

Rikku ran off and found herself a different river. She slowly undressed and got into the water, letting the coolness rub against her body, caressing her. She let her thoughts drift all over. She was upset because she knew Tidus was right. Auron would never care for her because of those reasons. Not to mention, Pops would flip. She stayed in the cool water until her skin was all wrinkly. She didn't want to go back to reality. As she got out, Yuna slowly approached her. Rikku spoke before she could. "Yuna, I don't know what Tidus told you but I am just not in the mood to talk." Yuna just nodded and walked away. Rikku got dressed then laid in the grass. She just wished things weren't the way they are. It's so frustrating.

After awhile Rikku returned to camp. Everything seemed normal so obviously Tidus didn't tell everyone. She was grateful for that.

They made their way down, approaching Thunder Plains. Rikku was terrified. Thanks to Brother, she hated lightening. Sure she used it during fights, but that's different. They got about halfway before she could feel the panic attack coming on. She tried to block it out, but she just couldn't. She begged the group to stop. They ignored her. She begged and cried and then begged some more. She wouldn't be able to hang on for much longer. She could feel her reality slipping away. Rikku felt herself breaking out into a cold sweat. No, no,no,no. "Please, guys, please stop for the night." She felt her body getting weaker by the second; she would lose it any second. Suddenly, Auron spoke out, "Fine, let's stop. Before she keeps whining." Rikku was so glad he stuck up for her. It was too late though, she had lost control. And in that moment, her world went black.