Coup d’oeil

Tilte: Cuddles
Author: Birddi
Beta: Filthy Mushi

A fanwork inspired from the fanfiction story: Green Dreams.

He giggled once again, “…Pretty Cloud-bride…” Burying closer to the blonde, Kadaj’s backside wiggled in the air. Brother Sephiroth was so lucky. Sephiroth x Cloud Rufus x Kadaj

Peace.

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Kadaj giggled, and buried closer to Cloud. Clutching the blonde’s warm pajama covered back, and rubbing his cheek into the soft scent. It never failed to amuse him that his older brother always smelled like peaches. Such a queer thing, his sleep muddled brain took delight in analyzing.

Cloud was warm too, and a bit soft, much softer than his other brothers were. And if Kadaj had been in a more awake state of mind, he might have credited that physical hardness of his own body and his silver-haired brothers’ to Hojo’s hands and madness. But as it was, Kadaj was pleasantly happy in cuddling around Cloud’s body, wrapping a leg in between cloud’s own, and pressing closer.

Cloud made such a good pillow. Sephiroth should have said that earlier. Kadaj entertained thought’s of kidnapping Cloud and bringing him back to his own bed at Rufus’s. He let out a delirious grin at the idea. He couldn’t imagine his biggest brother’s face at the discovery of Cloud’s kidnapping, but he thought it might be funny. Like a banana.

He snorted. “..Banana…”

Kadaj took a bit of Cloud’s baby blue pajama shirt into his mouth, and pulled, loosening the fabric from the blonde’s back to gather more in his mouth, nuzzling in the warmth of the fabric and the skin that was exposed. Cloud only muttered something and nuzzled into his own pillows. Kadaj paid him no heed however as he was too focused on being closer to his blonde brother.

Cloud was so nice to him, letting him stay with him and Sephiroth while Rufus was away for the weekend. It wasn’t hard to see that brother-Cloud had biggest brother-Sephiroth wrapped around his fingers after all. Kadaj thought it was because of their relationship, the one that Loz and Yazoo had. He still thought it uproariously funny that Loz had been the submissive in the relationship, no matter how it looked. One look from Yazoo had second biggest brother running this way or that to do Yazoo’s bidding. Biggest brother was very much like that. He giggled again in his sleep, at the thought that it was because Sephiroth was whipped by the pretty blonde with bright blue eyes.

He giggled once again, “…Pretty Cloud-bride…” Burying closer to the blonde, Kadaj’s backside wiggled in the air.

He bet Cloud would look pretty in a wedding dress. He had seen some advertised on TV, and hadn’t known what they were for at the time. White lace, just like he had seen, and maybe some of that elaborate beading that they had shown. Kadaj still wasn’t sure why there was a silly ‘thing’ of white that covered the face, one could hardly see an approaching enemy. And surely the long multi layered skirts would make moving difficult. Cloud would be pretty though, he thought. He still thought it was impractical and a ridiculous notion…

“Ridiculous.” He agreed with himself, nodding.

…to have a lavish party, ceremony, to show your love to one another. However, if Cloud was going to marry biggest brother, then Kadaj would come. Maybe he could be the ring bearer. But he’d didn’t have a ring, and a sudden frown marked his features. Surely Sephiroth would be cross with him if he didn’t bring a ring. Or maybe not, maybe he would bring Rufus. They both started with ‘r’. Surely that would be alight.

But, he didn’t want to give Rufus to brother-Cloud. Rufus was his. And he even told the image of his biggest brother Sephiroth, the one in a tuxedo with the pretty bride-Cloud on his arm, just that.

“No!…My Rufus.” Kadaj growled, pulling the corner of Cloud’s pillow closer to him.

Sephiroth had Cloud all to himself, Kadaj only got to see his only blonde brother just once in a while, biggest brother only needed one blonde. Sephiroth would have to find something else that started with ‘r’ for his wedding.

Rufus…he missed him. He wouldn’t tell the other of course, the stupid fancy pants with his big fancy words was already inflated with a big head as it was. He’d never forgive him! Scowling, he shoved the pillow Cloud was using away from him, gripping the corner in an attempted strangulation. Unseeing eyes opened and narrowed, stupid pillow-Rufus, he should leave Cloud alone. “Stupid Rufus.” He flung the pillow off the bed.

Cloud frowned as he had his pillow unnecessarily dislodged, and turned in his sleep to use Kadaj’s. Burying the younger boy’s head to his chest after the boy’s hair had tickled his nose. He had enough issues with his own hair.

Kadaj agreed with the change in positions, closing his eyes in favor of savoring the peach smell that his brother had. It was much stronger here. It wasn’t Rufus’ metallic scent though. Where was Rufus? He wanted to smell Rufus. Kadaj frowned in thought, the deepening scowl marrying his sleeping features, as the realizing that Rufus was in Wutai came.

Wutai was where the conference was, where Rufus was. Stupid bastard had left him. He wasn’t going to forgive him. Never, ever. Not even if stupid-Rufus bought him all the cupcakes in the world, or is he got down on his knees and begged for forgiveness. Well, Kadaj would show him…

He kicked the covers off as he vehemently swore out at the missing president “Never, fat-head!”

…Stupid bastard, could stay in Wutai for all he cared! He’d show him.

Cloud awoke, somewhat, at the missing covers. Grasping blindly for them, he made a triumphant sound as he dragged the covers back over both the younger boy and himself. Tucking the silver-headed boy who called him brother back into bed in a state of half-consciousness, as Cloud had often done with Marlene or Denzel. Letting out a small yawn, Cloud wrapped his arms, effectly entrapping the smaller one in an embrace. Giving a muffled, “Hush,” before going back to his dream of little Sephiroths.

Kadaj let out a low snore.

Stupid-Rufus had left him, and Kadaj wasn’t going to forgive him. Even when Kadaj had thrown a fit at the news, the stupid man had only half-listened and then promptly said that Kadaj wasn’t allowed to come. It was said in Rufus’s no-nonsense face.

Sephiroth’s was scarier though.

He had seen it when he had tried to strip brother-Cloud out of his clothes so they could have a bath together. Cloud was only allowed to bathe with biggest brother, he had been told. He didn’t mind it when Sephiroth said things like that in the no-nonsense tone. It was important because it was his way of showing how much he love-loved Kadaj’s blonde brother. Rolling his eyes at the obvious, he snorted into the covers, “Duh.”

When Rufus said it, it was different. Rufus had left.

Kadaj frowned and buried his face back into Cloud’s shoulder, willing some comfort from the blonde’s lithe form into his own. Feeling a burning ache in his eyes, and tried to whip it away on Cloud’s pajama shirt. Kadaj had been so upset at the news that Rufus was leaving. Kadaj had shrugged, trying to be strong like biggest brother-Sephiroth and asked what day they were leaving. It was after he had been told that under no uncertain terms was he, Kadaj, not going, that Kadaj had lost it.

“Not fair,” he reaffirmed the words he had shouted. He had screamed at the older man, and threatened that he’d kill everyone in the twice-damned city of Midgar if the other man left. Rufus had frowned disapprovingly at the time, but had stood firm. Kadaj had screamed that he would kill himself, would kill Rufus, and demanded to know why Rufus was doing this to him. Had said awful things to the blonde man before telling him how much he hated him. Kadaj had even thrown some heirlooms, which Kadaj had personally thought were tacky, at an ever impassive president’s head, and hadn’t received so much as a blink for his trouble. Even Rufus’s stupid Turk-servants hadn’t reacted.

And Rufus had left.

Kadaj felt the ache in his eyes worsen and he buried into Cloud’s shoulder for comfort, sniffing back a whimper. Cloud, with practiced movements, rubbed his back even as the blonde continued to sleep.

Rufus had left him. And Kadaj wasn’t even allowed to come. Which was probably the worst part of it, he was supposed to stay and Rufus was allowed to go. Rufus had just shrugged when Kadaj had asked what he was supposed to do. Rufus said he didn’t really care. He didn’t care. That had been what broke Kadaj’s rampage through the apartment. Kadaj had only stormed away screaming how unfair it was.

“Not fair.” Kadaj murmured again in his sleep, and Cloud tightened his embrace.

Kadaj had been so distraught that he had screamed fowl, fowl things at the bastard’s head and slammed the door to his room shut. It had only managed to survive the brutal use as Rufus issued a stronger material to be used after Kadaj had broken the first few. Kadaj didn’t care at the time, had even preferred if it did break. It had only made him madder.

After pacing in his room, he picked up the phone and dialed Cloud.

Brother- Cloud was easier to talk to on the phone than Sephiroth.

Kadaj remembered with a snort that Cloud had picked up the phone surprised, and out of breath. Kadaj giggled only now in his sleep, at the reasoning for that, but at the time had ignored it. Opting to complain and yell about how much of an idiot Rufus was being.

Cloud had patiently listened and offered that Kadaj come to his brothers’ flat for the weekend, so he wouldn’t be lonely. Kadaj had secretly wanted to jump at the chance, had bit his lip and clutched the phone tightly. Kadaj echoed the expression in his sleep.

But biggest brother was still a bit scary. Kadaj knew that Sephiroth was even more possessive of his time alone with Cloud than Yazoo had been with Loz. He didn’t want to make either one of them mad at him. It was the last thing he wanted. But biggest brother had taken the phone after Kadaj’s silent hesitation and with the sweetest words Kadaj had heard all night had told him, ‘We would both love for you to come.’

And so it was settled.

He was going to spend the four days and three nights at his brother’s flat. It was always a fun experience Kadaj thought. Even if it wasn’t all that often it happened. They played games, and watched movies. Sometimes Sephiroth would tell stories of the war with Wutai or funny recounts of the day. Sometimes, sometimes even Cloud would talk. Those were the rare occasions, when Cloud would talk about the life that could have been. The life Kadaj remembered, but didn’t. The life mother-Jenova had shown him. The life mother-Aeris had stopped. Kadaj always asked for Cloud to tell him the stories again, and again. Wanting to make sense of what he had known, had seen and done, but in this life hadn’t. It fascinated Kadaj that there were choices, options people could take to make different destines. It helped him hope.

The first time he had come over had been awkward, with neither he nor the others knowing what to do. It was only after brother-Cloud had brought him some cocoa that things had started to relax. They had even managed to play a few board games that his brothers’ friend Zack had found for them. It helped though when they were saying good-bye that biggest brother-Sephiroth had hugged him. It had been so awkward that Cloud had giggled, and Kadaj had promised to come again.

Kadaj giggled into his sleep, flopping around so his back was to Cloud’s chest. Snuggling backwards closer to Cloud, Kadaj muttered to his dream brother, “Silly biggest brother.” Cloud seemed to snort in agreement.

The early tenseness of that visit had been nowhere near as bad as the first time he had rung brother-Cloud. He had been so nervous at the time, something he had never experienced before, and had stood barefoot and, the word Yazoo often described humans as, vulnerable.

It had been a terrible feeling; standing in Rufus’s hallway, staring at the white walls and feeling but not registering the cold marble tile. Gripping the slip of paper with brother-Cloud’s phone number scribbled on it in one hand, and the phone in the other, he couldn’t remember that he dialed the number. It had been an endless sea of nothing, with him in the center, drowning. It had been four days of grief like Kadaj had never known, the realization had finally hit that his two brothers were gone. They had gone with mother-Aeris without him. It had hurt.

He had stared at the wilting flowers in a vase, and had wanted to die again. Wanted Yazoo and Loz to be there, but knowing they couldn’t. He had felt sick, wanting to be home. Had wanted to hear his brothers’ voices, had wanted them back so badly, that he had asked for the phone.

He couldn’t speak to Yazoo or Loz, but he just had to speak to his brothers, any brother. He had been so desperate at the time to just listen to a familiar voice, wanted a brother, and had been so immensely grateful at the time when Cloud had answered and every night since.

As it was, he had been so mad at Rufus leaving that he still had refused to speak to the other man as he packed, dropped Kadaj off, and left. Rufus hadn’t even leaned in to give him his usual good-bye kiss. Kadaj had made sure to kick him, although careful of his extra strength, when Rufus had only spoken to Sephiroth and had ignored him before stomping away after Cloud.

Once again Kadaj scowled, hitting the mattress, “Stupid Rufus. I’ll kill you!”

Cloud, still asleep, reached up to pat his head.

Across the room, outside a half-open door, and away from the realms of sleep stood two of the worlds strongest men. While they might have been stronger in different area’s with one in battle and the other in politics, it was the air of power which surrounded both that made for an uncertain atmosphere in the dimly lit hall. Neither of the two spying occupants paid it much mind, knowing not to with their respective partner sleeping in the bed they were watching and had been watching for the last few minutes.

“So this is what you were talking about.” Sephiroth motioned to the bed with a nod of his head. Leaning against the wall dressed only in his much unused pajama pants. They had been purchased for Kadaj-visited weekends, and had remained for that sole purpose.

Cloud and he both preferred an in-the-buff Sephiroth. It was convenient.

His companion, too dignified to lean against the wall or to go without a shirt, merely watched the scene with a slow sigh. This one dressed in a much-traveled in suit, even if the lack creases was a point in the wearer’s favor, tiredly answered. “Ironically, his therapists say it means he likes me.”

The therapists were also the ones who suggested that Kadaj work on his abandonment issues. Which was all said and good, but as Rufus inwardly scowled and remembered his still bruised shin, they weren’t the ones who had to deal with the teen’s wrath.

Sephiroth watched the bed with an amused glint touching his gaze. “I believe it.”

Thinking back to the past two days, Kadaj had either spent moping or asking Cloud to call Rufus. ‘Only to make sure the dummy hadn’t gotten killed, like he should have,’ in Kadaj’s words. Or in that case, ‘was going to be’ when Kadaj got a hold of him.

Sephiroth had bit his lip to keep from smiling at Kadaj’s very creative wording when it came to ‘the dog-licking bastard who had the soon-to-be-gone balls to abandon him’. Or the quickly followed, and predicted, crying spells when he cuddled up to Sephiroth’s chest and wanted to know why ‘stupid-Rufus,’ as Kadaj had renamed him, didn’t call yet.

An amused smirk, which Rufus personally thought wasn’t the time for, came to the general’s face. “From what I hear from Cloud… this is much less…manic than usual.”

Rufus closed his eyes to shield them rolling in their sockets with disbelief and bemusement, recalling his own experiences with the teen. His tone dry as he responded, “I’m aware,” with an interested look he turned to the taller man, “Am I to assume that it runs in the family?”

The delighted glint that appeared in the silver-haired man’s eyes, did nothing to reassure the Shinra president, nor did the accompanying words, “Perhaps.” With a fond glance to the bed, he turned back to his companion with a snake’s smile, “On some matters.”

There was a pregnant pause in which Rufus, much to his own chagrin shifted his weight, and brought a hand up to clear his throat. An automatic response that he had thought was long since shed. Self-preservation, he thought privately, did however prove to be a strong motivator. “I’m not as fond as blondes as others are.”

“Good.” The grin Sephiroth let cross his usually stoic face was far too shark-like for Rufus’s usual pallet. “…It would break Kadaj’s heart.”

The water’s ran deep, Rufus mused, keeping his eyes firmly locked with the general’s. Mincing words with Sephiroth was as challenging as it was trying. He much preferred the younger silver headed boy’s frankness as it was a wonderful escape from the usual grind. He was going to be in a word of trouble when Kadaj learned to put that charisma and crowd drawing power to use. Rufus just might be looking forward to it. But that was then, and as he was faced off against the older version of what Kadaj might become, he couldn’t say he was all too ready for it on a daily basis.

There was a reason that the general and the president did not have frequent meetings.

Rufus, of course, had been treading and parrying words since he was a child, and saw no reason to resist now. Raising an inquiring brow, he asked with all the innocence of a politician, “Playing the big brother part, are we?”

The general’s grin didn’t falter. “On some matters.”

Rufus didn’t dignify it. “Kadaj should be waking up soon. If I may impose in the mean time, perhaps you have some coffee about?”

Sephiroth stood up from the wall and led the way into the kitchen. “Why did you come back early again?”

Rufus chose not to dignify that either.

A few hours of discussing the meeting in Wutai and about the possible military options open, opting to do that now and over coffee rather than have to see each other anytime soon, and the raising sounds of their respective lovers came from the bedroom and filtered into the kitchen. Kadaj had been the first one out the door and into the kitchen, wanting his usual glazed donut and glass of milk, with a caffeine-deprived Cloud stumbling after.

The bedraggled duo came to an abrupt halt as Kadaj stood gapping, and Cloud squinting to see what the other had stopped for.

“Rufus!” Kadaj shouted, throwing his arms up and running to the still sitting president to wrap his arms and legs around the other’s torso in a full-body hug. Squeezing tightly and unknowingly causing Rufus’s own pained grimace. “Why are you here? Are you okay? Did anything happen in Wutai?”

Even if Rufus had wanted to answer the boy’s happy chattering of questions, they had been broken off with a sob and even more questions. “Why didn’t you call?”

A few sniffles and shaking shoulders meet the returned embrace as Rufus rubbed his hands along the upset teen’s back. And as Kadaj’s usual emotions went, sadness was quickly replaced with anger, and Rufus took it all in stride and simply waited. Kadaj reared back from the embrace and glared unmindful of the tears streaming down his face, “Why the hell didn’t you call! Go away, Stupid-Rufus!” Pushing against the man’s chest to get leverage and leave.

Rufus didn’t even blink as he pulled the distraught teen back into his embrace. “I hate you!” Kadaj screamed into Rufus’s shoulder. “You left! I hate you! Go away and die. See if I care!”

Rufus kissed his temple. “I missed you too.”

Kadaj scowled, hit the president’s shoulder and turned towards the table not bothering to remove himself from the man’s lap. And gave a polite, “Thank you, brother-Cloud,” as the other set a donut and fork in front of Kadaj before heading back to the kitchen to retrieve a glass of milk and a mug of something caffeinated for himself.

Rufus, safely at Kadaj’s back, rolled his eyes at the teen’s attitude difference when it came to Cloud. Why couldn’t he be so lucky?

Sephiroth smiled wearily around his coffee, having long ago come to terms of Kadaj’s favoritism. Nodding to Kadaj as the teen smiled sheepishly at him. Not even he, the biggest brother, had such star-struck adoration from the boy. Apparently he had that in another life, not that he remembered any of it. Although Cloud had assured him it existed, Sephiroth still found it questionable. Perhaps he had used it all up, somewhere along the way.

Sephiroth gave Rufus credit. His own honey was much more pliable, just like he liked, even if his blonde would never admit to it. All steel and will, with the cute fluff that made Cloud who he was. Zack’s phrase ‘turbo-chocobo’ was adequate, and Cloud was perfect.

He didn’t think he would know how to deal with an angry Cloud, let alone a forever emotionally manic one.

He feared the day that Cloud cried; he didn’t think the world could bare it.

Cloud sat down handing over the cup of milk to the still donut eating teen before cradling his own chocobo shaped cup, a match to Sephiroth’s own. The smell of the blonde’s drink gave it away as something suspiciously like the inbred child of coffee and hot cocoa. Sephiroth eyed what could have been whipped cream and chocolate syrup with suspicion. It looked, and smelled, like it had cinnamon as well.

He would never understand his lover’s ability to desecrate coffee.

But he supposed, as he stole a morning kiss from a still bleary-eyed Cloud and inwardly gagged at the man’s chocolate taste, that’s just what love did to a man.

Eyeing Rufus stroking the still squirming teen’s back, he couldn’t help but smirk.

“Stupid-Rufus, stop hugging me. Damnit!”

“Language.”

“Oh shove it, Stupid-Rufus. You better have brought me some cupcakes!”

Some were just unluckier than others, he supposed.


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