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Chapter Thirteen: Business Card

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Cloud frowned as he walked down the corridor near the chow hall. His shirt was wrinkled, as Zack had haphazardly tossed it into the cabinet, and now it smelled of dust and wood. He would get him back, somehow.

He entered the chow hall, surveying the line and the chalk-written menu. He wanted to bring Zack something hearty to eat for after his shower, as he seemed a bit somber and lethargic from the mission he had returned from.

Cloud walked past several members of his unit who were leaving, and they gave him friendly slaps on his shoulder, commending him on his rifle score from earlier that day. He had completely forgotten about his personal improvement from his previous score. He wondered if Zack had heard of it yet, as sometimes the man always seemed a step ahead of him, even when it came down to his own personal affairs. Cloud grabbed an empty tray and began the nerve-wracking task of trying to guess what Zack would like to eat.

"Hello, Cloud." An oddly familiar voice cut through Cloud's mind as he sidestepped along in the chow line. Cloud turned, his heart skipping uncomfortably in his chest.

It was that blonde psychologist.

"H-hello, Ma'am," Cloud said through a mouth that hardly moved. His eyes darted against her gentle face as he swallowed hard. Why was she talking to him? And why was she here in the chow line with a horde of adrenaline-riddled men? She had a tray herself and had chosen nothing but a simple salad. Maybe she just liked to people-watch.

Her eyes glanced down to Cloud's tray and studied the choices he had picked, as if she were assembling in her mind a diagnosis about his psyche by food choice alone. She made him very nervous. But she just smiled at him as their eyes met once more. That made him especially nervous. "How have you been?"

Cloud looked to his right, hoping that the line would start moving a bit faster so he could flee from this conversation altogether, as he had a feeling that it was about to turn into more than a simple greeting in the cafeteria. But luck was not on Cloud's side as someone at the head of the line was arguing with another about taking the last pudding cup.

"I've been...okay." He cursed himself, as 'okay' was a rather open-ended statement, and this could allow for her to dissect said word a bit more. Perhaps he should have just lied and said: 'I'm peachy, lady. What of it?'

But she just continued to smile at him warmly, and shuffled alongside him in the line. "Glad to hear that. And glad to hear your voice, finally."

"Um...what?"

She gave a quiet laugh, her hand covering her mouth as if to punish her light-hearted reaction to his boyish confusion. "You didn't say much to me, last time we talked."

Cloud frowned.

"So speaking to me now is quite the improvement."

One step forward; two steps back. Cloud fell silent.

"I was disappointed to see that you didn't come to our scheduled appointment last week. You were supposed to come and see me. Did you forget?"

He just mumbled an apology. He hadn't forgotten; he'd deliberately avoided it.

"You can stop by my office any time you want, Cloud. Whenever you're comfortable."

"No, thank you," Cloud said, mumbling.

"We could talk about whatever you'd like. It doesn't have to be about anything in particular," she said, smiling at him still.

He figured out why she made him so uncomfortable at that moment. She reminded him of his mother. He missed her dearly, but like a lot of things in his life, he avoided her. "I...don't have anything to talk about."

She looked a bit disappointed after hearing this, but still held that benign expression on her face. "I understand."

Did she, really? Cloud just figured she was programmed to say that.

The line began to move and if it hadn't been for that, he would have bolted then. He loaded up several types of side dishes into the foam boxes on his tray, at this point not even wanting to take the time to think about what Zack would like. He just wanted to get away from the seemingly judgmental eyes of the psychologist. He stopped at the dessert section, and his hand hovered above two different flavors of gelatin cups.

Crap. Cherry or –

"Strawberry," she said.

"What?" Cloud peered at her with a dubious look on his face.

"He'll like the strawberry one."

His heart stopped dead in his chest, once more, and he cursed the woman and her uncanny ability to crawl so easily beneath his skin. He paused for several seconds, his hand beginning to shake above the gelatin cups. A bit ironic to be trembling like that over gelatin, of all things.

So he skipped the dessert.

After a few uncomfortable moments of silently shuffling beside each other, Cloud finally reached the cashier and was for once more than happy to pay for the expensive meals he had plated. Usually he hated paying for them as they were a bit pricey for the quality, but it seemed like a heavenly beacon in the darkness of the awkward encounter with this woman, and he happily obliged with the total price so long as it meant his ensuing escape.

"Wait, Cloud. Let me give you something," she said before he could make a hasty retreat back to the safety of the corridor.

He bristled at her voice, but found that his muscles obeyed her and he stopped, turning around slowly. His eyes were staring down into the pile of boxes in his hands. Whatever he had stacked on the bottom was piping hot, and he hoped that she would just hurry and give him whatever she was going to give him, so he could adjust the boxes promptly to prevent receiving a second degree burn caused by a lasagna.

His eyes, staring at the foam box, had to readjust as something thin and rectangular was placed on top of it.

"I feel that it would be in your best interest if you came and saw me, sometime."

He frowned down at her business card.


~*~*~
He had always hated the word 'monster', as Angeal had used it often to describe himself and his transformation. But Essai and Sebastian...

What they were turned into, there was really no other word that would be fitting.

'Ravens', he recalled, was what the Turk he was with on that fateful mission referred to them as. A result of yet another deranged and sick experiment conducted by yet another deranged and sick man of the world.

Zack's SOLDIER friends, Essai and Sebastian, had been captured by AVALANCHE in an attempt to mutate them into Ravens to fight in the ongoing battle against Shin-Ra. The result was Zack holding them in his arms as they died.

Zack grumbled in his sleep, turning on his side. He hardly ever dreamed as he slept, but when he did it was only in nightmares.

The front door was pushed open by a young blond who was performing a balancing act with foam boxes once more, albeit this time around it was a few less. His eyes fell upon Zack who was facing into the couch cushion, still wrapped in his towel.

Cloud's heart jumped in his chest as the sound of the door caused Zack to stir and the towel slipped off his body, revealing a nice view of his backside. Cloud nearly dropped the boxes onto his feet. His face was red, and almost as hot as the food in his hands. He set the boxes down onto the coffee table, and quickly picked up the fallen towel and threw it over Zack's waist, averting his eyes. He was not expecting to come back to find the SOLDIER asleep on the couch, let alone asleep and naked.

He turned his head back, and was a bit mortified that he had missed with the blind tossing of the towel. He hesitantly reached down, picking the towel back up from off his thigh where it had landed, and draped it slowly across his waist once more.

Zack stirred again, groaning. He murmured something that Cloud couldn't quite understand as he began to curl on the cushions.

Cloud walked around to the side of the couch and squatted down, resting his chin on the arm of the couch, watching Zack as his eyes squeezed tight. He was sweating lightly. "Zack?" Cloud whispered.

There was no response to his voice, only Zack's soft breathing against the leather could be heard.

Cloud frowned, reaching over the arm of the couch to touch Zack's face. He brushed a tender hand across his brow, and the touch seemed to relax him. This simple reaction to Cloud's caress made the blond feel a combination of awe and empowerment, and he continued his gentle movement along his skin.

Zack moaned softly, the eyes that were darting about frantically beneath his lids now slowing, his troubled mind as he slept being slipped away from the nightmare by Cloud's loving touch. He sighed then, pressing his head against Cloud's hand.

A warm smile crossed Cloud's face as he began to caress Zack. His fingers played into his black hair, running through the wet strands that clung to him, taking an amused interest as they began to perk up into its usual spiky style. He thought of how he'd pushed his hands into the man's hair earlier, as he ran his mouth along Cloud's stiff length...

Zack suddenly hummed a pleasurable noise, and then muttered the blond's name.

Cloud's hand stopped, and his face turned red. The noise was a very similar noise to the one he made when Cloud released into his mouth. Zack was smiling, and quite conveniently licked his lips as he slept.

Cloud mimicked him, eyes locked onto the sleeping man's face. His hand resumed its touch, which resumed the subtle yet sultry noises from Zack. He muttered his name once more. Cloud wasn't sure that he had really heard Zack saying his name, but it was confirmed when Zack repeated it a third time, and his lips mindlessly kissed Cloud's palm, which still rested against his face.

Is he...dreaming about me?

"Zack," Cloud said, his voice firm. As much as he didn't want to wake the man, he could hear his stomach growling rather loudly as he slept.

"Is that lasagna I smell?" he said, groggily, catching Cloud off guard. Zack hadn't even stirred when his senses were roused by Cloud's voice and touch.

Cloud stifled a laugh, pressing his mouth up against the arm of the couch.

"Uh huh."

"Why're...you laughing at me?" He finally rolled onto his back, opening his eyes to see Cloud hovering above him. He hadn't noticed when the towel slipped off and landed onto the floor.

Cloud noticed this, however, and his face reflected his embarrassment. He put his head down into the arm of the couch. "N-no reason. B-brought you some dinner..."

Zack sat up, too groggy to realize how exposed he was, or how bashful Cloud was because of it.

Cloud lifted his head slightly, his eyes flickering down to Zack's backside before he turned and swung his legs over the side. Zack grunted softly, realizing he was naked, and quickly grabbed the towel on the ground and draped it across his lap.

"Sorry, Cloud," he mumbled.

"N-no, it's okay." Cloud stood quickly and began opening the boxes for him. "Got some good stuff tonight."

"I love Friday's menu. Especially the strawberry gelatin."

Cloud pursed his lips together and shot Zack a very amusingly shamed look. "Oh...well...about that."

"Uh oh," Zack said, already tossing a fork into the nearest box. "Forgot the dessert?"

"May...be..." Cloud said, almost in a sing-song way.

"I'll have to find something else for dessert, then."

Cloud knew the meaning of that innuendo, but he played innocent. "I can go back and get you something before the chow hall closes. I think I have a few minutes."

A chuckle flowed from Zack's throat as he stuffed in a rather impressive forkful of lasagna. "No," he said, once swallowing, "you stay right here." He watched as Cloud bit his bottom lip, not out of shame, but possibly from the thoughts that Zack could see running around behind his eyes. They were most likely the same thoughts behind his.

They both stared at each other, almost uncomfortably, for several moments before Cloud cleared his throat and looked away.

"You must be tired from your mission. I should probably go..."

"I'd really like you to stay for a bit longer," Zack said, frankly. "If it's the lack of clothes that's bothering you, I can-"

Cloud cut him off, looking at the door longingly. "It's not that."

Oh so it's not a problem? Zack tried to suppress the grin that threatened to surface on his face over this thought. "Talk to me, Cloud." He patted the spot on the couch next to him, and watched as Cloud's muscles twitched as if his body were trying to urge him to comply with Zack's enticing gesture.

He really did want to stay with Zack, but he was unable to control his natural urge to run in a situation like this. "No, I'm okay right here."

"C'mon." His voice took a higher pitched tone, soothing. It was almost baby talk, and this Cloud was very surprised to hear coming from such a man. It apparently did the trick as Cloud found himself joining the SOLDIER on the couch. Zack had a look of accomplishment over this. He immediately scooted closer to the nervous boy, after he set his dinner down onto the table in front of him.

"N-not hungry?"

"I'll get to that in a minute." His arm wrapped around Cloud's shoulder and pulled him into his chest. "You're a bit more important than dinner." He couldn't stop the smoldering look in his eyes from showing. The thought of the blond had plagued him all day; it was maddening.

Cloud struggled for a moment in his arms, but eventually realized that Zack wasn't about to let him go, once more. "A-about tomorrow..."

"I have a few places in mind for us," Zack said lowly, dipping his head down and brushing his lips against Cloud's. "Don't worry about that." A brief thought of being too forward with Cloud crossed his mind, and he paused his actions. But when Cloud's lips pressed back – perhaps more forceful than Zack's had been -- he resumed his tender advances.

A small moan came from Cloud, despite his outward stiffness during their sensual moment. "Z-Zack," he said, through their moving lips.

Zack just hummed an ambiguous reply as he pushed his tongue into Cloud's mouth, as if he were quieting him. Which was far from the truth, however, as Zack was hoping to rile up more of those wonderful noises from the blond that just ignited his lust so easily.

Cloud could taste the lasagna in Zack's mouth, and he began to feel hungry, not realizing he hadn't really eaten much that day. What a strange time to realize it. Of course, he could tell how hungry Zack was, as his stomach still grumbled angrily. And, of course, he could tell how hungry Zack was, as the towel across his lap was no longer laying flatly.

They kissed slowly, and Zack probed at Cloud's uncomfortable demeanor with his tongue, allowing his hands to roam across the boy's body. He started at his shoulders, passing down his spine in a light touch that caused him to release one of those noises into Zack's mouth. Then they skimmed up to his face, and he pulled away almost reluctantly.

Cloud began to speak, but stopped as his head was forcefully turned to the side, and Zack's mouth was suddenly latched onto his earlobe. Cloud wiggled, and twisted against him, the feeling a bit shocking to him at first. He soon found himself smiling as Zack's tongue entered his ear, and he could hear Zack's breath against his hearing. He laughed quietly, but this was followed by a moan as his tongue passed along each ridge in his ear. His body just seemed to melt.

I think I found his weakness! Zack continued zealously, pushing Cloud's hair out of the way to gain better access. He had to wrap one arm back around his shoulders once more as Cloud began to slump into the couch beside him. With each breath that Zack released into the blond's ear, it caused a shudder to wrack through his weakening body. He soon became invalid, his eyes fluttering closed, his muscles non-existent.

This just caused Zack to purr and pull him onto his lap. Cloud willingly followed, sliding onto him mindlessly. He could feel Zack's hard erection against his own, and Cloud pressed himself into it.

Zack released his first moan of the night, pulling his head away from Cloud's ear to momentarily enjoy the feeling, as the thin towel didn't do a very good job at blocking the sensation. He gripped his arms around Cloud's shoulders, slowly thrusting against his body, wanting so badly for the towel to be gone, and for Cloud's clothes to be gone as well. And this showed in his face as his teeth were gritted, and his eyes were reflecting what almost could have been mistaken for anger, if Cloud wasn't so sure that it was lust.

"Don't tease me like that, unless you plan on doing something about it," Zack muttered, nipping at Cloud's throat.

"I...can't help it," Cloud said as he tilted his head back, allowing Zack to have full access to his neck. His face felt incredibly warm, his vision blurred up at the ceiling as Zack purred once more against him.

"I like it, when you can't help it. Like how you were earlier." He nipped at him again, his hands beginning to tug at Cloud's shirt. "You enjoyed it, right?"

Cloud didn't respond. He was too embarrassed at this point by Zack's comments. His body did the responding, however, as he grinded himself against Zack's lap once more.

Maybe...with a little coaxing. Zack grasped Cloud's hands that were stiffly pressed against the back of the couch on either side of Zack's body. He urged them down, placing them carefully on his lower stomach. Zack just couldn't help it.

Cloud stiffened, whimpering in protest, but when Zack released his hands, they remained dangerously close to his erection. Zack squirmed beneath Cloud's weight, as if silently telling him to grab hold.

And he did.

A nervous bottom lip was retracted between his teeth, as a nervous hand slowly began to stroke Zack's arousal through the towel. Zack groaned, his stomach flinching from the sensation. The first touch was always the most sensitive. He continued apprehensively, and Zack watched with amused interest as his face began to turn bright with embarrassment.

After a few relatively silent moments, only interrupted by the occasional pleased grunt from the SOLDIER, Cloud's movements became more relaxed, more sensual. With their eyes locked on each other, Zack cautiously began to remove the towel that was keeping him from feeling the softness of Cloud's warm hand.

"N-now what?" Cloud said, as his eyes trembled, refraining from glancing down to Zack's lap. He blindly felt for the stiff member and wrapped his hand around it, his gaze never leaving Zack's.

"Well..." Zack cleared his throat, as his voice came out a bit shaky through his quickening breath. "Y-you can do whatever you feel comfortable doing." Of course, he was hoping for Cloud's mouth, but his hand did feel quite good.

Cloud just stayed still, his eyebrows slowly rising on his worried face. His tongue darted out and moistened his lips as a few thoughts were tumbling around inside his head. Zack tried to read into his facial expressions, but when Cloud remained inanimate, he decided to help.

He wrapped his hand around Cloud's tenderly, and slowly began to move their hands together along his member. "Like this..."

Cloud nodded, and at first he seemed reluctant with his taut muscles in his hand, but soon as Zack's eyes fluttered closed from pleasure, Cloud continued on his own. He watched as with each stroke of his hand, it caused the SOLDIER to become more and more limber beneath him.

"Am I doing this okay?" Cloud said as his hand began to move faster along.

Zack just groaned in reply, his head falling onto the back of the couch. His hands slipped onto Cloud's thighs and gripped him tightly, wanting a bit more than just his hand. But he calmed himself, as he could still feel a slight tremble though the boy.

Cloud took this opportunity to lean forward, after mustering a bit of courage, and he began to kiss Zack's exposed throat. He could feel the man gasp against his lips as he kissed him down from his jawline to the crook in his neck.

Fingers began to dig into Cloud's thighs, as Zack's teeth began to grind in building frustration. He thrust his hips into Cloud's hand, and could no longer restrain the growl that had been threatening to be released. "Cloud," he said, breathlessly. "Please."

Cloud pulled away, but kept his hand moving between them. "D-did I do something wrong?"

"No, feels good..." he trailed off, contemplating just being outright with him and telling him how much he wanted to be sucked off by those lips he loved so much. Ever since Cloud had been dangerously close to his groin the day he helped him bandage his thigh, the image of the blond between his legs was never too far off from his mind. It was beginning to become somewhat of a fantasy for him.

Don't scare him, you idiot.

Of course, Zack was never quite good at connecting his thoughts with the actual words that came from his mouth, at times. "Can you use your mouth?"

...You idiot.

"Really...? Uh..." His hand stopped. "H-how...do I...I mean, where do I..."

Zack squeezed his eyes shut, angry at himself. "Sorry, never mind what I had said..."

"No, it's okay," Cloud whispered, and Zack could feel him beginning to slide off his lap and onto the cushions next to him. "I'll...try."

Zack flinched once more as the boy's hand again grasped him. He forced his eyes to stay open, watching as those soft lips were moistened once more before the tip of his member was brought to them. His heart began to slam into his chest, his stomach began to flutter in excitement. And each nerve in his body tensed, waiting for that hot mouth to consume him.

Then a fearful noise came from his lap, however, and the nerves in his body gave up on themselves, and ceased to stand at attention.

"What's wrong?" Zack asked, his voice concerned.

"I'm sorry, Zack. I can't do this!" Cloud released Zack's erection and sprang to his feet. "N-not right now."

"Cloud, it's okay," Zack began, draping the towel back over his lap. "Come here, it's okay."

"N-no...none of this is okay. We...shouldn't be doing this."

Zack got to his feet, wrapping the towel around himself as Cloud rushed to the front door. "Cloud, please," he pleaded softly as he grabbed Cloud's wrist before he could open the door.

Cloud tugged on his arm, but Zack wasn't about to release him. "Zack, let me go."

"If you want to leave, that's fine, Cloud. I'll wait for you."

Cloud stopped struggling, and his blue eyes flickered up to Zack's. He went to speak, but Zack pulled him into a kiss. He whimpered briefly in resistance, but soon joined in.

Zack pulled away. "Will I still see you tomorrow?"

Cloud opened the door and slipped out, giving Zack a quick glance. "Yeah...maybe." And it was shut behind him as he left.

Zack sighed to himself and headed towards the bathroom, while tearing off the towel around his waist. He hadn't bothered to dress himself after his first shower, as he'd had a feeling he was going to need another shower that night, whether or not Cloud had stayed.

Particularly, a cold one.


~*~*~
There was a haze of cigarette smoke around the barracks. It was thick and suffocating. It reminded him of when Mejia had assaulted him.

"Hey, kid."

Cloud jumped at the voice, and his hand failed to grasp onto the door handle of the barracks. He whipped around, his eyes wide.

"Settle down, it's jus' me." Graves approached Cloud after he extinguished his cigarette against the ground with his boot.

"What do you want?" Cloud wasn't in the mood to deal with this man. He still looked fired up from the scuffle with Ratcliff.

"Why'dja run off earlier?"

"I didn't feel like listening to your shit," Cloud said, his voice carrying a very venomous tone.

Graves' eyes narrowed at Cloud. "Not everythin' I say is shit, Cloud. Ya know I'm right about Elici."

"Get to your point."

The man frowned; the look he was giving Cloud was almost a look of humility. His gold eyes glanced away from Cloud as he growled softly. "I jus'..."

...Is Graves apologizing?

"Shit Cloud, I didn't wanna believe it..."

...It was a nice thought...

"After what that fuck did to ya...it's not that far off to think that he'd kill 'im."

A scraping noise came from Cloud's mouth as he began to clench his teeth in annoyance. "I'm going inside. I don't feel like continuing this conversation with you."

"Why ya bein' a lil' bitch?"

Cloud paused as he reached for the door handle. He wanted to tell Graves all the reasons why this particular conversation was bothering him. He wanted to say that each time Mejia's name was mentioned, a sharp pain developed in his head at the memory of that night and was preventing him from continuing his growing relationship with Zack. He wanted to tell him that for each time Elici's name was mentioned, he had to bury the painful tears that begged for release on his face. And he wanted to tell Graves that he should stop concentrating on how Elici died, but to concentrate on the life that Elici had lived and shared with them as their friend.

"Fuck off, Graves," was all he was able to say, in the end.

Graves watched in silence as Cloud entered the barracks, shutting the heavy door behind him. With a brief frown, Graves heaved the seabag he had leaning up against the wall of the barracks, and swung it over his shoulder.

"Yeah...see ya later, Cloud."


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...To be continued in Chapter Fourteen: Train Tracks.