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Chapter Nineteen: Motive of a Child

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The force was unreal. It shook the two men down to their core as they were thrown up against the trees around them. They had been fighting for quite some time, dodging attacks from beneath the marsh, and from above them simultaneously. Their eyes were frantic, the muscles in their arms and legs strained with their movements through the murky waters, and their lungs were still from the breaths they held in their chest.

The water would ripple from all directions, and they would try to trail their eyes along the unsettled surface to find the source of the disturbance. It was almost instantaneous when the figure had lunged at them, and they barely had time to prepare themselves for the attack. Zack had been pinned against a tree, while Reno was knocked into the air from below the surface of the water. They managed to fight the figure back, allowing a moment of rest.

Zack finally caught sight of the figure between the trees darting about, snaking around each tree as if trying to distract the men. The movements were hard to follow, but he somehow managed to keep his eyes locked on as it came closer.

Reno widened his stance, preparing. "Is this shit for real?"

"Don't let your guard down, Reno."

"Ain't gotta tell me twice, yo."

A large serpent emerged from the waters, rising up on its body. Water dripped from its mouth as it opened, revealing its massive fangs while it hissed. Its large tail broke the surface of the marsh and slapped against the water, sending it spraying outwards.

Reno whistled, shaking his head. "How long do ya think it is? Twenty feet? We're gonna need a pretty damn big rat to satisfy this thing, yo."

"Or just a Turk," Zack said, grinning at Reno who only just scoffed and threw his head off to the side. "So? Heads or tails?"

Reno looked to Zack and grinned widely. "You can take both, yo."

Zack chuckled and spun his sword in his hand before running forward, aiming the tip at the serpent's head. "Fair enough."

The creature reared up, stretching itself to the treetops. Its tail twitched against the water, and its eyes watched Zack's swift movements as he lunged for it, swinging his sword towards its body in a blur. And in an instant, the serpent opened its mouth once more, and projected several streams of its venom onto its prey.

Zack was quick enough to shield most of the venom by ducking behind his sword, but he fell to the water below with a startled cry as it began to burn into his skin. He landed, stumbling and had to shove his sword into the murky marsh floor below to steady himself. "What the fuck! It can spit poison!" Zack said sputtering as he quickly splashed his eyes and mouth with water. He heard a few gunshots behind him as Reno began to unload the clip, and he tried to see if the Turk had hit his mark, but his vision was blurry either from water or the venom taking affect.

The serpent convulsed from the bullets as they tore through its skin, and it let out an angry hiss once more. It dove underneath the marsh, its shadow passing under the floating vegetation on the water, making it hard for Reno to follow its movements.

"Get that shit outta your eyes so ya can help me, yo!"

Zack growled, standing on his feet as he gripped the hilt of his sword tightly. "I'm fine," he said, trying to see past the blurred scenery around him. His skin was burning, and he was having a hard time keeping his eyes open – they were relentlessly trying to close on their own from the pain. "Which way?"

Reno glanced around, trying to catch the moving shadow underneath the water, but lost sight of it. "Shit, dunno."

Zack cursed a few times, rubbing his eyes with his hands. "Which way!?" he said again, his voice becoming louder, more agitated.

"For fuck's sake! Hang on!" Reno looked around, trying to concentrate, trying to pick up any slight movement in the water. It was hard to determine what ripple in the water was caused by them, the rain, or the serpent itself. Each sound around him was becoming distracting, including the pained groans coming from the SOLDIER beside him, and he just couldn't wrap his mind around the situation. "Let's just get the hell outta here, yo!"

"We can't, that thing will just pick up on our movements through the water. We have to kill it."

"That thing is fuckin' huge, ya think we can kill that thing with you like this?"

"I'm fine."

"Like hell ya are. You're blind as a bat, yo."

Zack gritted his teeth. His vision was practically gone – lost in a haze of crawling darkness. Now he couldn't tell if his vision was turning this way from pain, or from the venom itself. It didn't matter, they needed to do something, and fast.

Reno grabbed Zack's wrist and began running through the trees. Zack blindly followed along, yelling protests to Reno to stay and fight. Their movements were frantic and clumsy, causing their location to be broadcast through the surface of water for all creatures interested. Reno slipped between the trees, and as Zack followed, his sword would strike up against the trunks, making him stumble from confusion.

"C'mon SOLDIER get your ass in gear, yo! This ain't the time or place to be eaten alive!"

"We can't outrun it, Reno!"

Reno scoffed as they reached the open marsh, passing through the last of the trees. "Fine, if ya wanna stay here and be eaten, that's fine by-"

Zack heard a hard slap against the water, and then silence.

"Reno...?"


~*~*~
Ratcliff tossed his helmet to the bench he was sitting on and began to run through the sea of people. His heart was racing fast, his vision tunneling to focus on the man in the crowd. He could see him – he stuck out like a sore thumb compared to everyone else. His tall frame, dark brown skin, and wiry, fuzzy hair was unmistakable. His booming voice cut through the chatter around, and his laugh – it was forceful and strong. Ratcliff could pick that laugh out of a million.

"Graves!" He ran through a cluster of people who were clamoring around a gaming booth. They stood to watch someone make a drunken ass out of themselves by trying to knock down a pyramid of bottles with a ball, and miserably failing.

He called the man's name several times, to which Graves just continued to casually walk through the festival, glancing at the different booths around, and to occasionally step around the children who would suddenly stop running in front of him so they could gawk at the toy prizes lining the games.

And several of those children suddenly turned their attention on Ratcliff, and ran up to him with wide eyes, large grins, and an abundance of questions about the guns he had around his shoulders.

"Can we touch it?"

"What?" Ratcliff glanced from the children back up to Graves' form sifting through the crowd.

"Can we play with it?"

Ratcliff growled. He normally liked children, and had played with them on the slopes back in his hometown of the Icicle Inn on occasion, but now was not the time to humor their little minds.

"Have you ever killed anyone with your gun!?"

"What? No." Ratcliff was fidgeting now, as the parents of the children finally came up and began to apologize over and over again for their children's youthful curiosity. They blocked Ratcliff's view of Graves, and he cursed under his breath.

"Oh! He said a swear!" one of the children cried.

Perhaps he hadn't said it under his breath like he thought he had. He stammered a sheepish apology and sidestepped them quickly. Another curse word left his mouth, this time confident it wasn't said under his breath. Graves was gone.

Ratcliff felt like throttling the children, but then would rather take that out on the parents for not watching their offspring closely. But he thought against that, assuming that his job would be at stake, so he ran past them, even as the kids began to chase him playfully. He heard their parents snapping, and their little groans of disapproval followed.

He called after Graves again, spinning around in the crowd to try to find him. He was unaware that his breathing began to quicken, as did his pulse as people walked past him, shoving up against him mindlessly, or brushing against him as they turned to face the nearby booths. He shuddered and felt as if he were being closed in by the citizens and the buildings around. His skin began to flush, and then the thought of having an anxiety attack began to swarm in his head.

He couldn't stop thinking about it, and all the people so close to him. He wanted them to go away, he wanted them to stop touching him and yelling around him. He could hear each person's voice beating against his brain, digging into his nerves sharply. He couldn't control his mind as it began to race, and his vision began to blur.

He hadn't had a bad anxiety attack since the riot outside of the Shin-Ra building. Since Graves had saved him.

Not now, no. Go away, go away. Shit, not now. Please...

He somehow managed to stumble through the crowd and found himself against the side of a building in an alleyway shortly after. He couldn't even remember getting there, but somehow he did. He leaned his forehead against the cool brick of the building and sighed, his breath quivering from his lungs.

"Fuck!" he said, pounding his fist against the side of the building. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" He slowly sank down with a sickly moan, angry at himself for succumbing to a long forgotten ailment, and for losing sight of Graves.

He didn't notice when someone stepped into the alleyway, until the figure's body blocked the light from the festival.

"I thought ya stopped fuckin' in alleys a long time ago."

Ratcliff turned his head slowly, sweat trickling across his brow. "Graves."

"Yeah."

"What're you...doing here?" He tried to stand straight, but his knees gave out on him.

Graves shrugged casually. "Ya know, enjoyin' the sights and shit."

Ratcliff sank to his bottom, leaning his back against the building for support. "'And shit'?"

"Scopin' out the ladies."

"Bullshit."

"That's why I called it 'shit', bro."

"What are you doing, yeah?"

Graves scoffed, folding his arms across his large chest. "Thought I went over this."

Ratcliff slammed his fist behind him, smacking the side of the building with a disturbing crack. He winced slightly. "No! What the fuck are you doing leaving Shin-Ra!?"

Graves recoiled his head, blinking in surprise at Ratcliff's unnatural outburst. "Bro, settle down, a'ight? I got motive."

"Motive!? For just walking out on us!?"

"Seriously, lower yer fuckin' voice."

"No! Fuck you! I have half a mind to beat you senseless right now!"

Graves laughed, unfolding his arms. "You and I both know that ain't possible."

"That's your fucking problem! You think you're invincible! You think that nothing can ever get you, so you just run off and do your own fucking thing! Well fuck you, Graves! Fuck you up the ass!"

Ratcliff didn't realize that he was crying.

"C'mon bro. Don't start that shit. I thought ya were also done cryin' in alleys."

He hung his head, his blond hair falling into his eyes, as if to hide his tears that had already been seen by his friend. "I'm not crying, yeah," he mumbled, his voice cracking. "I'm not."

Graves frowned sympathetically, but made no attempt to console him physically, or verbally.

"Don't leave Shin-Ra, please. You...you said that..." he trailed off, shaking his head to dismiss what he already began saying.

"I ain't got time for this."

Ratcliff shut his mouth, turning his head away from him angrily. He said nothing.

"See ya, Jo-"

He cut Graves off quickly when he realized he was about to walk away. "What about Cloud?"

"What about 'im?" Graves said, almost chuckling.

"Who's gonna watch over him?" Ratcliff finally looked at him, their gaze meeting. Several people ran past the alley, laughing joyously. It made Ratcliff growl inaudibly at their mirth.

"That ain't my job no more."

Ratcliff felt a tug in his heart, and he knew pain was written all over his face. He didn't try to hide it – Graves knew, of course. That's right, he has Zack...he doesn't need us, does he, Graves?

"Are ya done? I gotta get goin'. I told ya I have motive for doin' what I do."

"And what's that? Revenge for Elici?"

Graves frowned a bit, shifting his weight on his legs. "Well, Elici can't do it, so someone's gotta do it for 'im."

"That's nonsense."

"So what? Ya jus' want this guy to go 'round doin' what he did to Elici to anyone he fuckin' pleases?"

"Let Shin-Ra handle it, yeah."

"Fuck Shin-Ra! Fuck them up the ass! What's Shin-Ra done for us other than put a little gil in our pockets? It ain't 'nough for me."

"It's a business, Graves. What do you expect them to do for us when we are the ones that work for them, yeah?"

Graves was gritting his teeth noticeably, and Ratcliff was thankful for being quite some distance away from him as he looked ready to pounce. "So yer okay with Cloud gettin' molested and shit, and Shin-Ra doin' nuffin' 'bout it?"

"Yes, I'm okay with that."

"What?"

"No! I mean– Shin-Ra will take care of it. Don't worry, Graves. We haven't heard anything because it's probably just top secret, yeah. Of course they're not going to turn a blind eye on all of this."

"So ya sayin' Shin-Ra didn't turn a blind eye on them 1st Class SOLDIERs that went AWOL? They announced that they're dead, but ya know it ain't true, bro. Sumthin's up their dirty little sleeve."

"How do you know they're not really dead, yeah?"

"I dun fuckin' know, ask Zack! He seems to know what might've happened to 'em! Knowin' Shin-Ra, they're prolly held captive as some sort of sick fuckin' experiment or sumthin'."

Ratcliff finally stood, dusting off his trousers. "You're an idiot, yeah."

"Ya just can't handle the truth, bro. Never could. Ya just run away when the situation jus' gets too scary for ya," Graves said, peering into the uncomfortable expression Ratcliff held. "Ya gotta be a strong man, bro. Otherwise ya can't protect him."

Ratcliff looked away, rubbing his upper arms with his hands. He doesn't need me.
"Whatever ya say."

Ratcliff blinked. Had he really said that out loud?

"Look, bud. I was there for ya. An' I was there for Cloud. I've...never been there for Elici, ya know? But...he...he always had my back all along. An' I now jus' realized that."

"What do you plan to do, Graves? Just tell me, yeah?" Ratcliff walked towards him slowly, afraid he'd turn and leave.

"Ya know, I ain't got no one," Graves said, his voice surprisingly quiet. "Parents're dead...all I have is my uncle Barret in Corel, but ya know I don't talk to 'im much." He rubbed the back of his neck, shrugging as his eyes fell to the ground in a rare instance of humility. "We had a fallin' out. Last I talked to 'im was a while back, and he was soundin' crazy over the Mako Reactor Scarlet was buildin' up there. He gushed about it so much – it was like talkin' to Mr. Shinra 'imself." His eyes finally trailed back up to Ratcliff, who was wiping at his own eyes angrily with his hands. "So you, Elici and Cloud...ya'll like brothers to me, ya know? That's why I gotta do what I gotta do."

"Graves, please," Ratcliff said in soft voice as he stepped to him. "Just...stay. Don't go at this alone, yeah? Come back to Shin-Ra, take a few nights punishment in the brig for going AWOL, and just...come back."

Graves laughed, placing a firm hand on Ratcliff's shoulder. "Ya sound like a girl that's beggin' her man to stay."

"Well...you did say that you'd always watch over me, yeah."

"Dun even go there, bro." He pushed Ratcliff's shoulder away, but chuckled. "I only said that 'cuz ya were cryin' like a little kid, back then."

There was a long silence that passed between them, and neither could look at each other in the eye. It was painful; it was too real for Ratcliff.

"What should I..." Ratcliff finally raised his eyes. The pain must have been written on his face again, as Graves took a step back uncomfortably. "What should I tell Cloud?"

Graves thought for a moment, frowning. When he finally spoke, his voice was its usual tone. "Tell 'im to suck it up and take it like a man."

Ratcliff scoffed, looking away.

"...An' tell 'im that you'll be watchin' over 'im...jus' in case he wants to take it like a little kid."


~*~*~
Zack paused, listening intently to the noises around him. The sound of the insects buzzing around the floating vegetation in the water was prominent, as the rain began to let up. Zack could feel the setting sun weaving in and out of the clouds that passed overhead, and he could almost feel it warming the water of the marsh. He had to concentrate past all of that nonsense to be able to hear a slapping of the water some distance away. It almost sounded like a fish jumping in the water, but judging by the strength of the sound, and the birds that once again became disturbed nearby, he knew it was the serpent.

He ran after the hazy shadow beneath the surface as best as he could for losing most of his sight, and wading through deeper parts of the marshes. He saw what looked like thrashing beneath the surface as the water bubbled up and caused the vegetation to disperse from around it. He gripped his sword tight in his hand as he jumped into the air. He hoped he judged this right.

The tip of his sword entered flesh, driving deep into the skull of the serpent. Zack landed on top of its head, pushing his weapon even farther into the creature with a vengeful growl. He heard frantic splashing right beside him, and soon Reno's gasping and sputtering followed.

"What the fuck!" He coughed as he sat up, then fell silent as he was inches away from the edge of Zack's blade.

"You okay?" Zack said calmly, turning his head to the source of all the commotion. He tugged on the hilt of his sword, and wiggled it from the creature's head. "It's dead, right?"

"What the hell do you mean by that, yo? There's no way it could've survived that!" Ya can't see it?" Reno tugged his pant leg free from the grip of the serpent's mouth, wincing.

"No, I can't," Zack said calmly, again.

Reno peered at him for a while quietly. Zack's eyes were red and glazed over, and tears were streaming down his face involuntarily. And yet he hardly seemed panicked or fazed. "Ya serious?"

The SOLDIER ignored him. "Are you hurt?"

"No, it just got my pants, yo. Chomped down and prolly mostly got a mouthful of all the crap under the water. I think I'm okay, yo." Reno lifted his leg as best he could from beneath the water, which was now turning red with blood from the dead creature. His pant leg was torn from the knee down, but his skin looked relatively unharmed.

"That was a close one. I'm glad you're okay." Zack sheathed his sword and clambered off of the serpent's head. Its body began to rise in the water, and float on the surface. It made Reno jump. "There are probably more than just one of these things. We should get moving – there's probably a nest nearby."

Reno scoffed and started to wring out his hair. "Don't hafta tell me twice, yo."

Zack nodded and began to walk. "We should be nearing the cave so-"

"Other way, Slick."

"What?" Zack stopped, turning his head towards Reno's direction. He was slightly off.

"The cave is the other way, yo."

"Oh. Right." Zack looked a bit embarrassed and turned back around the other way and started to walk, ignoring Reno's teasing laughter.

"Man, ya can't get very far..." Reno trailed off as Zack suddenly staggered in front of him, and then collapsed into the water without a sound. "...with being poisoned like that, yo."


~*~*~
Reno had dragged Zack, plus that massive sword, through the rest of the marshes. It was a long haul, but he had to get them both out of the cold water. The rain came back twice as strong and pelted down on them relentlessly, and the sun began to set, taking its warmth with it behind the planet. Reno was almost sure he felt the water level rising on them.

And Zack was a heavy man. Reno was strong, but even carrying him slung lifelessly over his shoulder was more than enough for the Turk. His cigarettes were water damaged, so he wasn't the least bit happy to be doing this without one clenched between his lips and filling his bloodstream with the nicotine he was craving. He wasn't a heavy smoker, as being in the Turks required to be smoke-free, but occasionally he liked to puff on one to settle his nerves in certain situations. He had actually cut back on his smoking habit once he joined the Turks, as it was clear that smelling like an old ashtray and espionage didn't make for a cohesive combination, and he could live with that mostly. But on his own time, he was known to puff three or four in a day, depending on his stress level.

They finally reached dry land, and he lay Zack along the ground, nearly falling on top of him from exhaustion. He swore a few times to himself as he sat back, pulling out his soggy pack of cigarettes. He removed one, frowning at its waterlogged body, and crawled over to a rock that still caught a bit of sunlight on its surface. He placed it down, hoping that the sun would dry it before it crawled across the mountains behind him.

He was shivering, and perhaps he and Zack should have been the ones in the sunlight.

"Shit, you're more trouble than you're worth, yo," Reno said, patting around his jacket for something. "Count your lucky stars if I didn't lose this, Slick."

Zack responded with a small groan and squeezing of his eyes. The swelling in his eyes had gone down the past few hours, as Reno would stop and catch rain water in his hands and gently wash his face with it. It was a tedious process, but Reno wasn't sure how clean the water in the marsh actually was.

Reno just hoped Zack's eyesight wasn't too damaged. He knew that venom in the eyes wasn't too damaging, as long as it didn't enter the bloodstream through an open wound on the face or body, and as long as it was washed off quickly. But the pain was immense, and he only wondered what it was like from such a creature as the giant serpent. He always thought that story of the giant snake was a hoax, and would have called anyone who swore by its existence nothing but a loon.

He glanced down briefly to the rip in his pants where the thing had snagged him. He only had one antidote, and luckily only one of them needed it. "Good news, Slick, I got it, yo." He pulled out a vile and pulled the small cork out with his teeth and spit it off to the side. "Let's see them mako blues." He drizzled some of the antidote into each of his eyes, and wherever his skin was red and inflamed on his face. "Normally this is supposed to be ingested, but I think it'll work like this, yo."

Zack stirred and lifted his head quickly, almost frightened. "What the hell are you putting in my eyes?"

"Ungrateful, aren'tcha? It's a fuckin' antidote, yo."

"How long was I out for?"

Reno pushed his head back down and finished dropping the remaining liquid into his eyes. "Long enough, yo. Pain musta been bad to knock ya out like that, yo."

Zack rubbed his eyes, blinking rapidly a few times as he sat up. He looked around, but his gaze seemed to not fix on anything in particular. They would dart about, almost as if he were trying to see through a room of complete darkness.

"Still can't see very well, can ya?"

"I'll be fine. It's not that bad."

"Welp," Reno said, motioning to the cave behind them, "think ya can see in that dark-ass place?"

Zack actually turned his head the correct way and Reno watched his eyes closely as they looked up and down the entrance to the cave. "I can handle it," Zack said, nodding.

Reno relaxed a bit, glancing over to the cigarette that now had a thin puddle of water beneath it, and which was no longer in the ray of sunlight, as it had moved between the racing clouds above. So much for trying.


~*~*~
They collected themselves after a while of resting, and after trying to dry and warm themselves as best as they could in the little bit of sun that remained in the area. Zack seemed to be able to see, at least a little bit. He maneuvered around the rocks and shrubs in the area with only a little trouble, and he entered the mythril cave with Reno trailing behind.

The tunnel entrance had been dug through by the miners from Kalm, and the rock surfaces around were shaved down smooth, revealing glittering flicks of the mythril woven between. The natural opening to the cave was on the other side of the mountain, facing Junon, but the people of Kalm had heard of the abundance of the metal in the cave, so they excavated into the mountain and mined their way through.

They finally reached the large void of the cave. The diminishing sunlight from above trickled in through the cracks in the ceiling of the cave, lighting up the flowstone in hues of golds and browns. It reflected down onto the calm pools of water surrounding communities of rocks littering the floor. Zack kneeled down by the water and splashed more of it on his face, and Reno attempted to light up a cigarette, only to fail.

"Where should we camp out for him?" Reno said quietly, removing his cellphone from his suit. He cursed and flicked it closed. "Damn, it's busted, yo. I was gonna see if there was any more info on his whereabouts."

"Wouldn't get any signal in here anyway," Zack muttered, rubbing at his eyes vigorously. "We'll continue on through the night. If he's traveling in here, he won't be doing it in the dark. It's too dangerous with the monsters lurking, even for SOLDIER."

Reno scoffed, giving him a rather bland look. "Yeah, 'cuz that would be stupid, even with perfect eyesight. It's gonna get dark as fuck in here come nightfall, yo. And ya just said it was dangerous for SOLDIER."

Zack stood, shaking his hands off. "Perfect time for an ambush."

"Ya mean – perfect time to trip and break your goddamned neck."

"I don't care. I told you I have a score to settle with this guy. I won't stop because of a little blurred vision."

"Right, right. Got it, yo. Although ya never explained why."

Zack paused for a moment, his mind trailing to the memory of Cloud in the hospital bed, hooked up to all those machines, but still giving him a smile as he entered the room. Cloud didn't look the least bit concerned for himself, and had looked more interested in just seeing him as he entered.

All I did was walk in, and yet I made him smile like that. I can't let him down. I can't let that smile fade.

Zack nodded to himself, his fists clenching down at his sides. "That guy tried to take something away from me. I have to make sure he never does it again."

Reno frowned thoughtfully, his eyes narrowing. He eventually nodded without a word, and began to walk ahead down the path.

"Reno?" Zack watched as his blurred form began to disappear. He could hear him speak then, his voice echoing through the void of the cave.

"I'll have to tell Cissnei ya ain't interested. It's gonna break her heart, but she'll get over it eventually."

Zack just shook his head and followed Reno even deeper into the cave.


~*~*~
There were strange noises coming from the alleyway where Cloud stood guard. It was behind him through an archway beneath the second level of the town, which held various shops for weapons and materia. He could hear footsteps of townspeople from above resonating through the concrete, which almost sounded like trucks driving over a bridge, but the noises he heard deep within the alley were different.

The hair on the back of his neck stood, which he thought was rather funny because he never thought that expression to be true. He dismissed it as nothing but a cliché that people would use to substitute for when they didn't want to admit that something had scared them shitless.

He was fearless growing up as a child in Nibelheim. Constant ridicule and being treated as an outcast was something he faced everyday. He would try to follow around the other children of the town, but each one of them pushed him aside. Even now that he was older, he never did quite figure out why they treated him that way, as he had done nothing to warrant such discrimination. At first he would get himself into stupid situations, daring that he could jump off of the water tower without getting a single scratch, or enter the creepy mansion on the edge of town without getting scared. It worked at first, as the other children would cheer him on as he performed these inane stunts, but soon they became uninterested in him. So he began to rebel against them, hoping that he could possibly establish some sort of rank within their clique. He would pick fights with the others over the littlest thing, hoping to submit them into acknowledging him. He would take what he could get, even if it was negative attention.

It drove his mother crazy at times as he would come home with black-eyes, bruises – even cracked ribs. His behavior caused his mother to have to apologize on his behalf to the other adults in the town, and it began to wear her patience thin with him. She was overbearing of course, but even a mother who was lax would become worried over such reckless actions. She often blamed him for her graying hairs, even though she was still young.

Of course he felt guilty. Of course he wished he was stronger, and well liked, like his father had been. At first his father was the town's Jack of all Trades. He would go around fixing the furnace in the Inn, repairing leaks in the water tower, or even going out of town to deliver and trade goods with other towns on an old motorcycle he received as payment for rewiring the strings in their neighbor's piano. But as monsters began to appear on the outskirts behind the town from Mt. Nibel, his father had taken up arms and patrolled the town to keep everyone safe. He was protecting the citizens, he was protecting his wife and young son. He was protecting his strength.

Cloud wanted to have that same strength for at least one person in his life. He thought he could do that by bloodying someone's nose, or yelling profanities until his throat was sore. But he hadn't realized that it made him more of an outcast. He thought he knew who he was fighting for, but he had gone about it all wrong. He had to leave. There was nothing left in that town for him anymore. It he were to stay, he would continue to degrade into even more of a coward than he already truly was. And until he found that one person to be strong for, he couldn't return.

But now he was shifting uncomfortably as the noises changed from shuffling, to scraping, to thumps, to whatever else that could possibly crawl underneath his skin. He was angry at himself for allowing such fears to wash over him, so he tried to take his attention back to the festival in front of him. But he found that he continued to glance over his shoulder warily, almost expecting some sort of creature to crawl forth and nab him.

He cursed himself for going to that stupid monster movie with Zack the night before. The special effects were laughable, the sound effects were eyebrow raising, in a bad way, and the acting was...well, the acting wasn't that awful, now that he thought about it. But he surmised that the movie was possibly the reason why his imagination was running a bit childish from those sounds behind him.

"Hey!"

Cloud yelped, rather embarrassingly, and whipped to the side to see Kumpf standing there with a few skewers of barbequed meat in his hand.

"Just making sure Ratcliff wasn't groping you in this alleyway."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Exactly what it sounds like." He held out the skewers to him, smiling a bit lopsidedly. He might have been drinking, as when Cloud looked over his shoulder he saw Zabalza not too far off stumbling around. Birds of a feather flocked together, he figured.

Cloud took the barbeque from him with a frown. "Aren't you guys supposed to be on guard? What the hell are you doing out here?"

"Goddamn Strife. Chill out. I was just bringing you something to eat. You haven't taken a break yet."

"That's because, unlike you, I'm doing my job."

"Oh great, another little Haskin."

Zabalza stumbled up. "N-no, sounds...sounds uh...more like Elici. Haskin won't even bother sayin' anythin' in...um...his...defense."

"You're really drunk, aren't you?" Cloud began to pull the meat off with his teeth. His stomach was crying with joy, as he had barely eaten anything in the morning, and whatever he had, he just threw it up on the ride over to town.

"Damn right I am, buddy." Zabalza placed an arm around Cloud's shoulder. He reeked of alcohol, and Cloud turned his nose away. "We jus'...um...c-checkin' in on ya...yer like our new best friend."

"Comfy, can you get him away, please?" Cloud relaxed as Kumpf peeled the drunk off of his shoulders, and he resumed eating.

"I better get him back to his post."

"He's better off back at the Inn in a bed. He's kind of pointless right now."

Kumpf laughed, glancing around for Kunsel in the crowd. "Yeah, maybe I'll see if Kunsel will let me take him back. You should at least sit down for a minute, Strife. You look really tired."

"Thanks for the food, Comfy." Cloud watched as Kumpf waved to him as he disappeared into the crowd, dragging a very inebriated Zabalza with him.

Cloud walked over to the large stone steps leading to the upper level, and sat down in the corner, away from the foot traffic. He was thankful that Kumpf had brought him something to eat, and he smiled to himself that someone was nice enough to think of him like that, even if the man had been drinking. He learned that some people became overtly friendly while drunk, but as long as it got him free food and smiles, he would be content. Although, he would probably end up paying Kumpf back, anyhow. He never liked people spending their money on him, and even with Zack he forced him to accept his gil for the movie the night before.

Zack looked rather irked at that, but just silently took it with a rather forced grin on his face. Cloud immediately apologized, but then regretted it as Zack leaned over and whispered that he owed him one kiss later, and he wasn't allowed to choose when and where it was going to be. Zack never did lay claim to that kiss that night, so he was anticipating when it was going to be, and how embarrassing it was going to be, as well.

He then wondered how Zack was doing on his mission. He knew that Zack was keeping something from him about it, but he just figured that perhaps it wasn't something he was cleared to discuss. Maybe if he prodded enough, he'd get the man to give in and tell him the true details about what he was really doing.

Or perhaps if he were to tease him with a little kissing, Zack would give in...

Cloud was thankful for his helmet, as it hid his skin that began to heat up on his face. He was shocked with himself as of late. His thoughts and actions were unpredictable with Zack; he couldn't stop himself when he was around the man. At first it scared him, but when Zack seemed to enjoy his forwardness – no matter how awkward it was – he was beginning to settle into it quite comfortably. Zack's openness seemed to draw his inhibitions from him like he thought nothing, or no one, ever could.

He initiated pleasuring Zack last night. Perhaps he was going crazy. And that nickname – 'Angel' – Zack had purred it to him again as he climaxed in Cloud's waiting mouth. Cloud normally hated nicknames, but there was something about that one that made him smile and long to hear it murmured again. It seemed more meaningful than 'Spikey', or 'Chocobo'. It had emotion and passion behind it, even if it was a girly nickname. But frankly, Zack could call him whatever he wanted during their intimate moments, so long as it meant it was coming from Zack's heart, and as long as it was only during those moments. If Zack were to call him that outside of the apartment, well, Zack wouldn't have a tongue to speak with afterwards.

The skewers of meat were quickly cleaned off, and he looked over to the booths, almost longingly. He wanted more, but he wasn't given the go-ahead from Kunsel to take his break yet.

Ratcliff hasn't reported back in over the radio yet. It's been a long time.

Cloud walked down the steps and returned to standing in front of the alleyway. He briefly thought of checking in on Ratcliff. It wasn't like him to take this long on a break, let alone not report back in to the SOLDIER in charge. He glanced around in the crowd in front of him to see if he could see Kunsel at all, and when there was no sight of him, he nodded to himself and began to sneak off to go look for him. It wouldn't take long.

"And where do you think you're goin'?"

Cloud stopped at the familiar voice, the color in his face draining rapidly. He swallowed hard, his heart beginning to thump in his chest between the lungs that suddenly failed to breathe. He could feel something hard and cold being pressed up against his spine, and he shuddered as the person behind him leaned down and whispered into his ear.

"Well, if it ain't my little fuck."


~*~*~*~*~*~*~
...To be continued in Chapter Twenty: Serendipity.