Hopes Despair

Hi I know I haven't updated for a while, but i've been busy with study and work. But I have a few chapters to post, thanks to all who have read and I hope you enjoy it.

Chapter 7

I lay on the bed with my eyes closed somewhere between sleep and reality, I eventually sensed a presence in the room. I slowly opened my eyes waiting for blinding light to burn my retina’s, then I realised that I was in complete darkness except for the light coming in through the window. I opened my eyes fully taking a moment to adjust to the darkness (Isn’t it funny that when you sleep it’s dark, but you still need to adjust to the dark when you wake up) I looked around the room trying to figure where I was then realised that I was sleeping in Tseng’s spare room. I sat up scratching my head, ‘man this bed is fucking comfy’ the last thing I remember was laying down staring up at the ceiling. As I rubbed my eyes, I noticed the silhouette of someone standing by the window.
“Hey you know standing in the dark is still stalking?”
The figure did not turn nor acknowledge my question. “Hey weirdo what do you want?”
“Reno. Respect please”
“Tseng” I replied surprised
“Yes Reno?”
“What are you doing standing by the window in the dark?”
“What does it look like? I’m looking at the stars. This is the only room in the house that you can see the sky clearly”
I sat confused over why he was star gazing rather then spending time with Elena. “Why aren’t you spending time with Elena?” I sat eagerly to hear one of his speeches about taking time for ones self to reflect upon what they have and so forth, however I was treated to something completely surprising.
“She’s asleep”
I looked over his shoulder trying to figure out why he was not asleep either, and why he was still dress in his uniform standing in my room.
“I can’t sleep, if that’s what you’re wondering” he continued to stare out the window
“Busy thinking about me was you?” I asked mockingly
“And what if I was?” he replied stoically “Would that be such a crime”
I sat in silence “What are you saying Tseng.”
“I thought it was obvious” he stood for a moment before moving towards me “Reno having you here keeps me awake”
“Then why are you hiding me here?”
“Because I didn’t know where else I could keep an eye over you, without drawing suspicion” I could see concern come into his face “I didn’t want anything to happen, I didn’t want you to end up like Rude” he knelt down beside me “Does that answer your question or do you need more of an explanation?”
“So it wasn’t because…” I could feel my stomach churn “Because you wanted to be close to me?”
His eyes fell to the floor “Reno it’s complicated I can’t let my feelings and emotions interfere with my job, you’re here so I can protect you.” he looked into my eyes
“But it doesn’t mean I don’t like having you here.” he leaned in and tenderly kissed me on the lips “Because I do.” he started to stand but I grabbed hold of his collar.
“Then stay?”
He stared at me “Did you not hear what …” I cut him off with a soft kiss, “Of course I heard” I placed a hand on his cheek as I kissed him again with a little more pressure. He lowered himself back to his knees as he returned the kiss, the intensity slowly increased as he finally let his guard down. Feeling him finally loosen up I pulled him in closer, he did not resist as I slowly encouraged him to stand up.
“Tseng please stay?” I asked softly into his ear
“Do I have a chose?”
“No” I kissed him on the neck loosing myself in his scent. I felt myself flow away into the sweet scent of Jasmine as I softly caressed his neck with my mouth. I could hear soft moans of pleasure as I continued to work my way down to his collarbone slowly running my tongue along his neckline.
“Tseng”
“Don’t speak!” he moaned “Please don’t …” desire evident
I grinned as I began to kiss up under his chin, slowly climbing up onto my knees. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he lifted me off the bed, our kiss never breaking. He walked us over to the window, gently placing me on the seat. He drew away from the kiss reluctantly as I followed him forward I was stopped from going any further by him placing his hands on my chest.
“Tseng what’s wrong?” I asked annoyed
“Elena is …” he looked over my shoulder out the window “Are … I don’t want to hurt her. But when you’re …” he turned hesitantly and walked towards the door.
“Tseng, you can’t just leave like this” I called panicked. ‘I can’t let him leave’ I thought
“Reno I have to do this, stay there awhile to think over what has just happened now” then he left.
I continued to stare at the now closed door ‘what the fuck just happened’, I finally broke my stare and looked around the empty room. I turned to the window looking up to the stars, ‘what did he mean by think about what had just happened’. I stared aimlessly at the sky then I noticed a smudge on the window, I grinned to myself ‘so Tseng doesn’t always get every piece of dirt’. I began to rub the smudge, just as my finger was about to smear through it I noticed it was a word ‘wait’. I stared confused at what it could mean, why would someone write ‘wait’ on the window for? Then remembering Tseng’s last words to me, he had asked me to wait by the window and think about what had happened. The word was telling me that I had to be patient I rubbed the word off the window with my sleeve. I stared out the window again this time with a huge grin of relief covering my face, so that it was how I drifted off to sleep happy and content.

I stirred awake by the sensation of a soft breeze upon my cheek slowly I opened my eyes to see Tseng standing over me caressing my face.
“Tseng” the word not making sense to my sleep induced grogginess.
“So you actually did as I asked for once?” he asked faking surprise “Are you cold sleeping there?”
“Umm kinda” sleep still having a hold.
Tseng watched me for a moment then disappeared from my sight I could hear him move around the room I closed my eyes listening to nothing in particular. I felt something warm being place over me I opened my eyes to see Tseng sitting next to me placing a blanket over me.
“Thank you”
“What for” I replied with sleep induced confusion
“For listening, for being you” he leaned in and kissed me on the head
I did not want to tell him that I had not really meant to fall asleep here so I did the only thing that came to mind I let out a very long and satisfying yawn. Tseng let out a small laugh as he leaned and pulled me into a hug wrapping us in the blanket, I leaned against his chest. “Tseng, where did you go before?”
“I went to check on Elena” he began to stroke my hair, massaging my head in the process.
“Did you sleep with her?” I asked already knowing the answer.
“Why do you want to know” unease creeping into his voice
“You smell of a mixture of sweat and Jasmine” I looked up to see him looking down at me.
“I’m sorry Reno. She woke up as I was about to comeback” he shifted his concentration to running his fingers through my hair. “Reno you didn’t see her face when she saw me sitting on the bed, she looked so relieved that I was still there and not here with you.”
I turned slightly to see Tseng’s face clearer “Don’t apologizes Tseng. I know this is difficult for you, don’t think I don’t see that.” I placed a hand on his cheek “I appreciate what you are doing for me and I don’t want to put you in a situation you’re uncomfortable with”
“Thank you Reno that means a lot to me especially coming from you” he looked at me for a while before kissing me on the lips, the mere touch of his mouth sending shivers down my spine.