DOGS of War

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“The incision seems to have healed completely. We should be able to remove the stitches at any time. Would you be able to come in first thing tomorrow morning?”

Zack nodded, smiling at the young doctor. He smiled back and finished his thorough inspection of Zack’s back and collar, his smile fading the more closely he looked at the metal apparatus.

“Will you be able to remove it?” Hope tinged Angeal’s voice as he questioned the medic. He was seated against the wall with Genesis, Haine sandwiched between them.

“No.” He frowned, turning to the large man. “Not entirely. We should be able to cut off the majority of the circlet and grind down whatever we can’t, but the plate that attaches the band here to his skin and the screws driven into his spine will have to remain. Were we to pull out these screws and remove it completely… well, the best case scenario would be complete paralysis from the neck down.”

Angeal was less than pleased with that, but it would have to do.

“Good thing I look so hot in turtlenecks, huh?” Zack joked, immediately lifting the growing tension in the room.

The door to the room opened and a nurse walked in. She had short brown hair and a friendly face and she smiled at them warmly as she made her way over to the doctor. As she walked past them, Angeal suddenly grunted in surprise and looked down at the albino youth who had smashed up against him, looking for all the world as if he wanted to become part of Angeal’s bicep. He could feel Haine shaking slightly in panic and reflexively reached up to cover his face, shielding him from her as his fingers threaded through the boy’s white hair and he held him close. He looked up to meet Genesis and Zack’s matching expressions of concern, and the doctor’s bewildered face. Unfortunately, the young nurse had also noticed and she was now in front of him, reaching out to Haine, her eyes full of worry.

As if he could sense her approaching, Haine shuddered and retreated further, leaning to slip behind Angeal and nearly pushing him out of his seat as he lodged himself firmly between the man and his chair.

She froze, her hand poised midair, as Genesis wrapped a hand around her wrist gently pulling her back. “He’s afraid of you,” the redhead whispered softly. He didn’t say anything beyond that, but she thankfully seemed to understand, nodding sympathetically before quietly retreating from the room.

Once she had gone, Haine silently extracted himself from behind Angeal, straightening back up to sit motionless in his own chair. A slightly uneven tremble to his breathing the only sign that anything had even occurred.

Zack stared at him, wide-eyed. He had been so sure that Haine’s reaction to Scarlet had been caused by her similarities to Einstürzen. The nurse had looked and acted nothing like her, though. Could it be that Haine was so traumatized that he was now afraid of all women? He supposed it wouldn’t really be an immediate problem-women were few and far between in ShinRa- but what would happen to Haine when he had to leave? He pouted slightly as the doctor continued examining him in the now tense silence.

A few minutes later, another nurse entered the room, this one a male. All eyes turned to Haine, but the man walked past without so much as a twitch from the silent boy. The newcomer was clearly uncomfortable, sensing the tension he had walked into. Zack forced himself to relax, grinning up at the man charmingly. In minutes, the atmosphere in the room had returned to its previous calm, the men returning to comfortable conversation. Angeal stared at his student in wonder. Only Zack could be half starved and covered in stitches with an instrument of torture bolted to his neck, and still find the confidence and charm to bring light to the darkest of situations.

After the doctor had done a thorough once-over, asking Zack for all the details of his ordeal while his assistant took notes, they determined that the worst of the damage-aside from the obvious-was merely severe hunger pains, which would be taken care of as soon as they were through. It was then Haine’s turn to be examined. Angeal and Genesis shared a look of apprehension over the youth’s head, but with Zack’s quiet urging, the boy stood and moved to sit beside the spiky brunet on the examination table. Zack resisted the urge to wrap an arm around the smaller boy, staying out of the doctor’s way but hoping to give Haine some comfort as he was examined by remaining at his side.

Haine’s eyes were blank as he did as he was told, removing his shirt without hesitation, taking a deep breath when prompted, answering any questions he was asked in a soft monotone. He didn’t know when Zack had grabbed a hold of his hand, but he was vaguely grateful for the warmth and pressure of it. A few more questions, some nodding, movement, and his shirt was slipped back over his head, Zack was standing, smiling, time to go.

“I hope you have food at your place, because I’m starving,” Zack said bluntly, nearly bouncing in place as he looked up at his mentor and now roommate.

Angeal contemplated for a second. He knew he didn’t have much at his place, one didn’t often go shopping before shipping out for an extended mission. He glanced at Haine, the small boy’s too-thin torso still clearly visible in his mind’s eye despite being covered now by the flimsy fabric of his shirt. “I don’t have anything on hand, but I’ll have something brought in for us. I wouldn’t dream of subjecting you two to cafeteria food right now,” he finished with a small smirk.

“Thank Gaia!” Zack said dramatically. “I think we’ve had enough torture and starvation for a while!”

Genesis could swear he saw a flash of something in Haine’s eyes, though whether it was mirth or misery, he couldn’t be sure. “If we’re getting takeout, I know of this little Wutaian place down on the plate…”

Zack and Angeal turned to look at the redhead incredulously.

“What? Too soon?”

Their laughter was light and cheerful as the four made their way through the halls toward Angeal’s quarters.

= = =

Angeal deftly punched in the key code to his room and the door swished open revealing the comfortable living space within. Zack’s things had already been moved into the guest room for him, and he immediately dragged Haine along with him to check it out. Angeal and Genesis couldn’t help but smile as the two disappeared into the room. Genesis headed for the phone to order lots of everything from the Wutai restaurant, and Angeal set about cleaning up what little clutter lay around the room and putting away unnecessary throw pillows and the like to make more room on the sofa. He had no idea why throw pillows were even invented, but they came with the couch and he really had no valid reason to get rid of them.

Genesis hung up the phone, turning to watch Angeal clear paperwork and reports off of the table, taking care to sort and stack things appropriately. He took a few moments to study the dark haired man, noting the lightness in his steps and the tiny smile gracing his chiseled features. It was more than obvious how deeply Angeal cared for his student. One would have to be blind to miss it. Even Lazard had picked up on it during the brief meeting earlier. Genesis couldn’t help but believe that their lenient ‘punishment’ had more to do with Zack’s innocent charm than either of the commanders’ actions or reputations. He wasn’t joking when he’d said it, he had really grown rather fond of Angeal’s pup-despite having barely exchanged words with the boy. The profound effect his presence had on the stoic brunet was more than enough proof that he was a one of a kind, and the more time he spent with the spiky haired teen, the more he saw just what his childhood friend had fallen for. Honestly though, you’d have to be defective not to see it…

“I didn’t realize that me clearing off my dining room table was so fascinating. Maybe I should start selling tickets.”

Genesis blinked, startled out of his thoughts by Angeal’s teasing voice. He realized the table was now cleared and the tall brunet was looking at him strangely, laughter lighting up his eyes. He must have been staring. “Ah, just lost in thought, Ange. It’s been a long day.”

Angeal’s mirth faded slightly, replaced with understanding. The two shared a few quiet minutes of comfortable companionship. They were long past the need for words, Genesis leaning comfortably against the wall near the phone, Angeal seated in one of the table’s chairs, his arms resting on its top. Zack’s bright laughter could be heard emanating from the other room and Angeal lit up at the sound, Genesis unable to resist following suit.

Some time later, a sharp knock at the door signaled the arrival of food and Genesis immediately headed for the entryway. Angeal stood, following Genesis toward the door but diverting off to head down the hallway. He passed the bathroom, stopping in front of the guest room-no, Zack’s room.

The door was open, but he knocked lightly on the door frame anyway as he looked into the room. Zack looked up from his place on the bed and grinned brightly. He was seated with his back against the wall, Haine was in front of him, leaning back against his chest. There was an open shoebox on the bed beside them and pictures and memorabilia from within it were strewn about on the comforter. Angeal recognized most of the items from Zack’s time in SOLDIER; he seemed to be keeping the more personal and family related items tucked away for now. It made sense, in a way. Haine had no pleasant memories of his own, of course Zack would take it upon himself to share as much of his as he could without reminding him of his loss. Haine appeared to be asleep, but Angeal suspected he was most likely more aware than he let on; his instinct to shut down being a result of living in fear for so long. He noted the tender and protective way that Zack held on to Haine, and something in the pit of his stomach suddenly felt heavy. Angeal tore his gaze away, scanning the rest of the room. Most of Zack’s belongings had been put away already, though knowing Zack, it wouldn’t be long before the clothes had all found their way out of the dresser and all over the room along with the various odds and ends he’d gathered during his time in Midgar. Angeal’s eyes fell on the large, green lump at the end of Zack’s bed. He had no idea where or when Zack had gotten the massive bean bag, but somehow the image of a younger Zack on a train bound for Midgar clinging to the giant blob of bean-filled comfort made its way into his mind.

“Food here?”

Zack’s voice knocked Angeal out of his pondering and he had to suppress a snort when he realized that he’d just teased Genesis for spacing out and now he was doing it himself. Heck with long day, it had been a long week. He nodded, smiling as his student immediately tried to jump up before realizing that Haine would need to move first. As suspected, the albino youth immediately opened his eyes and began sliding himself off the bed so Zack could get up. He kept his gaze to the floor and Angeal could only wonder what was going through his head as his energetic student babbled on about how great Wutai food was and how much he was going to like it as they made their way back out to the dining table where Genesis was busy unloading carton after carton from several large bags.

Zack lead Haine to one of the chairs at the table and, once he was situated, turned to head into the kitchen to grab plates and silverware. The food did come with chopsticks, but using them was a technique that Zack didn’t have the patience to master, and he didn’t think Haine would be too appreciative of the extra hassle either right now. Once Genesis had finished unloading the bags-tossing the empties into a corner of the room and grinning impishly at Angeal’s tiny twitch of irritation at the action-he settled down at the table and began opening the multitude of variously sized cartons while watching Haine from the corner of his eye. The young boy’s nose twitched a bit as he sniffed the air appreciatively, but remained motionless otherwise, his eyes locked steadily on the bare wood of the table in front of him. Genesis frowned a little. He didn’t profess to be an expert on children, but he knew enough to realize that a normal one would be at least a little excited and impatient at the sight of so much delicious food after being starved for so long. Even a grown man would be at least eyeballing the food with intent.

Zack returned, his arms full of plates and cutlery, and began setting dishes in front of everyone. Angeal looked at the bottles of beverage that had been delivered with the food before disappearing into the kitchen to emerge a moment later carrying four glasses and a container of ice. As the four finally settled down to eat, Zack took the liberty of scooping a mass of food onto Haine’s plate, and double that onto his own.

The steaming plate of delicious filled Haine’s field of vision and he turned to look up at Zack uncertainly.

“Go on, eat!” Zack said exuberantly, his own fork poised and ready to dive into the plate in front of him.

Without hesitation, Haine picked his fork and speared a vegetable off the plate. Three sets of eyes were glued to him as he placed it in his mouth, chewing thoroughly before swallowing and repeating the action.

Once satisfied that his charge was taken care of, Zack pounced on his own dish, an utter contrast to Haine’s delicate manner.

Dinner passed in easy conversation, Zack more than happy to continue regaling Haine about the wonders of SOLDIER, and all of his friends in SOLDIER, and all of his fond memories in SOLDIER, and what he was going to do now that he was a second class SOLDIER. Genesis decided Zack was the new SOLDIER spokesperson. Angeal Vetoed. Haine consumed his dinner in silence, watching the others from behind the strands of white that fell over his eyes.

= = =

“Well, here it is.” Genesis punched in his keycode, the door to his quarters swiftly swishing open.

After dinner, Genesis and Haine had left Angeal’s apartment, and headed for home. Zack, of course, had wanted to come along, but it was rather late and both Genesis and Angeal knew that if Zack didn’t let go of Haine at some point, none of them were getting any sleep-and Zack was getting his stitches removed very early in the morning. Thankfully, Genesis was relatively impervious to Zack’s puppy-stare and Haine was a blank canvas so they were able to slip away without much ado. As Genesis led the silent youth into the apartment and began showing him around, he began to wonder if perhaps he should have let Zack come along.

“Here’s the bathroom.” He hesitated, suddenly uncomfortable. “You are, um…”

“Housebroken? Yes.” Haine’s voice was soft and bland, his face vacant of any expression, but for just a split second Genesis saw that flash again. That flicker of something buried deep in Haine’s crimson eyes.

Not knowing whether to laugh or be ashamed, Genesis continued on down the hallway with little more than a nod of acknowledgment. “Here’s your room.” He opened the door, leaning in to switch the light on before ushering the smaller boy into the room. It was fairly large and nearly every wall was lined with bookcases. A sizable L-shaped desk was up against a section of wall that jutted out into the room a bit. The huge wooden surface held a computer and nearly every inch of exposed desktop was plastered with papers. A bed had been placed up against one wall of the room-the only wall not occupied by desk or bookcases-and a wardrobe had been brought in to make up for the lack of a closet or dresser. “I know it’s a little cluttered. This is usually my office… this is only temporary though. Once we find somewhere for you to stay more permanently, you’ll have your own room.” An uncomfortable sort of silence fell over the pair as Genesis watched Haine stand unmoving, clearly unsure of what to do next. Yes, Zack would have come in quite handy right about now. He looked over Haine’s small frame, taking in the uncomfortable tension in his shoulders, the slump of his spine, the limp way his hair fell into his face… “Come on, let’s get you into the shower. While you’re in there, I’ll find something for you to wear. I can’t imagine you’re very comfortable right now...” Genesis vaguely wondered where his usual gift for words had gone as Haine followed him into the bathroom. “Okay, towels are here. Soap, shampoo, and all that are in the shower already. I have a tub in my bathroom, so I usually just use the shower here, it’s less time consuming. Don’t worry about hot water, there’s plenty so take as long as you want. I think I have a spare toothbrush you can use, I’ll bring that in here for you. Tomorrow we’ll look into getting you some clothes, but for now I’ll just see if I have anything you can sleep in.” He slid the large glass door to one side, reaching in to twist the knob, turning the water to Hot, but not far enough to be uncomfortable. When he turned back he was unsurprised to see that Haine had already kicked off the borrowed boots and pulled off his shirt. He crumpled the garment a bit, holding it while he glanced around before setting it on the toilet seat lid. Genesis smiled, figuring the boy was happy to finally be rid of the flimsy, grimy clothing and far-too-large boots and thankful that he was still conscientious enough to not want to make a mess. “Take as long as you want, I’ll leave the clothes in here for you whenever you’re done. If you need anything, just shout.” With that, he slipped out the door, shutting it quietly behind himself.

Once he was alone, Haine quickly slid off the last of his clothing, setting it on top of his crumpled shirt. He looked up, noticing the mirror over the sink. Noticing himself. He stood for a few moments in front of the mirror, his eyes tracing the foreign curves and planes of his own body. Is this me? He leaned over the sink, reaching out to the face in the mirror, his fingertips resting against the cool glass as steam billowed around him. Is this what they see, or just what I see? He pulled back from the mirror, turning to the shower door and sliding it open to step into the hot spray. He slid the door shut, closing his eyes and sighing at the feeling of hot water bouncing off of his head and running down his body. He arched his back to bring his head more fully under the torrent, as he ran his hands down his torso, feeling the sharp jut of his ribs over the flat plane of his stomach. He continued exploring his body, dragging his blunt, dark nails over the skin stretched taut over his bones and muscle, leaving goosebumps in their wake. He brought his hands up to scratch and scrub at his scalp, growling softly at the sensation. After several long minutes of simply basking in the wet heat, Haine finally opened his eyes to look for the soap and shampoo so he could wash himself properly.

Once he was clean to the point of squeakiness, he turned the single knob on the shower wall to Off, standing for a few seconds in the large, steamy, tiled space. Some water ran into his ear and he shook himself, sending wetness flying in all directions. Running a hand through his hair, he slid the door open once again, stepping out onto the plush, squishy bath mat. As he wrapped himself in a massive bath sheet, he noticed that his clothes were gone, replaced with a small pile of folded clothing. He dried himself quickly, hanging the towel up again before picking up the clothes, slipping them on, and exiting the bathroom.

Haine peered around the corner of the hallway into the living room area. Genesis was nowhere in sight, but a sliding glass door was open to the darkness outside. As if sensing his gaze, a voice drifted in from the opening.

“I’m out here, Haine.”

He followed Genesis’ voice, stepping cautiously out on to the small balcony.

Genesis looked over as the small albino came through the doorway. He appeared decidedly more relaxed and comfortable in a pair of Genesis’ old pajama bottoms and large tee-shirt that he was pretty sure used to be Angeal’s, and he smelled fresh and clean. He set down his book and stood from his lounger to situate himself next to the boy, who was now staring out over Midgar’s skyline, his hands grasping the railing before him.

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” Genesis said softly. Considering that Haine had no memory of his life before he’d woken up in an underground prison, this was most likely the greatest wide-open space he’d ever seen. He was transfixed, leaning out over the railing, looking up to see more of the sky and the stars that seemed to be trying extra hard tonight to send their glimmer shining through the thick smog that hung over the city. Genesis placed a hand gently on Haine’s lower back, steadying him so he wouldn’t fall over the edge, his breath catching in his throat when the boy turned to look at him.

Sharp, bright, crimson eyes met his own soft blue, all traces of glaze and blankness gone. Genesis was frozen in place, his hand still resting gently against Haine as the youth’s eyes swept over him, taking in every detail. Haine’s gaze was intense, and the redhead resisted the urge to squirm under the scrutiny. Moments later, Haine brought his eyes back up to meet Genesis’. They were no longer sharp or calculating, nor were they blank or glazed over, instead they were simply… open. A soft expression that was similar to a pet awaiting a command. He shifted slightly, pulling his hand away as he turned to face Haine fully.

“It’s… pretty late. You must be tired. You should get to bed,” he said gently. He immediately regretted the words as Haine instantly glazed over again, his movements returning to their previously mechanical state as he turned away from Genesis with his head down to do as he was told. The redhead gaped for a moment in shock and anguish before he’d finally gathered himself enough to reach forward, grabbing Haine’s arm and spinning him around to face him. “Haine?” The boy didn’t struggle, simply standing limply in the larger male’s grasp, his eyes still downcast. “Haine, look at me.” He did so and Genesis winced inwardly at the vast amount of nothing he once again found in the boy’s expression. Suddenly, something clicked in his mind and he leaned down to look the young male straight in the eye. “Haine, listen to me, that wasn’t an order. I know it may be hard to understand right now, but you’re free now. She did a lot of horrible things to you, and I can’t take that back, but I promise, I won’t ever make you do anything you don’t want, okay? You aren’t a slave, and you aren’t a pet, and if anyone ever treats you that way I want you to tell me right away so I can kill them. I’ll try to be more careful with how I word things, but I want you to try to remember that when someone asks you to do something, if you don’t want to do it, you don’t have to. You’re allowed to say no, and you’re allowed to want something else. You don’t have to shut down anymore, Haine. You don’t have to hide anymore.” Relief washed over him as Haine’s eyes cleared again, only the smallest traces of blank uncertainty lingering, replaced with a cautious hope. “Tell you what, if you’re not tired, we can watch a movie. Would you like that?”

“Movie?”

“Mhm, it’s kinda like a book, but instead of seeing what’s happening in your head, you see it on a screen.” As he spoke, he straightened up again, moving his hands from Haine’s arms to his shoulders. His fingers brushed the cold metal and he couldn’t help the rush of excitement that ran through him at the thought of it being gone tomorrow. Maybe once the heavy reminder of his slavery was removed, he could move past it once and for all. “So, you wanna watch a movie?”

Haine’s nod was accompanied by the tiniest of smiles, but Genesis could swear his heart skipped a beat.

Fifteen minutes later, the two were settled on the couch in front of the large flat-screen TV in the living room. The movie had barely started when Haine’s soft weight settled against Genesis’ arm, and he looked down to see the albino lost to comfortable sleep. He smiled warmly, grabbing one of the small throw pillows on the couch and fluffing it in his lap before gently guiding Haine to lay down on it. So that’s what they’re for… He pulled the blanket off the back of the couch, laying it gently on the sleeping boy, tucking it in around him and settling in to watch the rest of the movie. Five minutes later, he too was asleep.

~ ~ ~